Mom.life
kelsea Nelson
mommabearkelsea
kelsea Nelson·Мама двоих (7 лет, 8 лет)
i need to rant for a moment. so im 38 weeks today. due pretty much any time now. and my bf has 3 daughters. and weget them every other weekend. well he told their mom tht since ill be on maternity leave and ill be home that were gonna take them every weekend. well he went ahead and agreed to and planned this before ever talking to me about it first. this is my first child. is it okthat im upset over this? am i selfish for not wanting 4 kids every weekend while im adjusting to the mom life? also he works 2 ft jobs, so hell barely be home. idk how im suppossed to manage a 6, 8, and 10 year old girls alomg with my newborn son by myself every weekend. on top of being home all week by myself with the baby. im stressed over this because i just think its unfair that im obligated to take on this responsibility by myself every weekend while on my maternity leave, which is given to me to give birth, recover from, and get used to being a new mom. am i wrong for feeling this way? 😢
10.11.2016
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Yeah. if he isn't gonna help you and your just raising them mom to step mom then he needs to make other arrangements. I understand he is trying to support his children and they are your children now too but it isn't solely your responsibility. You need to take care of you child and he needs to take care of all of his children. That's not fair to you
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mommabearkelsea
kelsea Nelson·Мама двоих (7 лет, 8 лет)
@beebaby, hence the reason im upset. they come to see their dad. and if hes gonna be at work whats the point? their mother never does anything with them so it cant be to give her extra breaks. im just upset
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we would be having more than a talk after that. if he isn't helping then what is the point of them being there
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mommabearkelsea
kelsea Nelson·Мама двоих (7 лет, 8 лет)
@mommyofsoontob3, exactly my point. i already have issues getting them to listen to me. they are very hyper active kids. not trying to sound horrible but i dont think im going to have the rest or patience to deal with that. olus be up all night also because he sleeps due to working. im just frutrated because he added soo much extra stress to my plate and im not ready yet
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nwhite0823
Nakeia White·Многодетная мама (6 детей)
As a step mom of three kids as well, you are not wrong at all. He should have talked it over with you.
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mommabearkelsea
kelsea Nelson·Мама двоих (7 лет, 8 лет)
thanks guys. im just worried. idk how im going to manage at first. i just wanna enjoy my baby, and get used to my. mommy life before caring for everyone else too.
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madismommy
Aurora·Мама четверых детей
I don't think you're wrong ! I feel the same way
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armywife2
Yeah, if he's not going to be there at all, that's a different story! You're going to need so much rest. I would just talk to him about it, or even talk to the kids mom (if she's understanding).
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jeanetta25
Jeanetta·Мама двоих (8 лет, 16 лет)
But you never know you might be able to juggle it just fine once you get use to the new baby . Either way just talk to him and take it day by day
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mommabearkelsea
kelsea Nelson·Мама двоих (7 лет, 8 лет)
@armywife2, dont get me wrong. i love the girls. but when they come over, they stay up super late the wake up super early and when daddy isnt around i habe a hard time getting them to listen. im just stressed because hes not gonna be home at all to help. and i feel like i wont be as available to them and their needs like i should be. and i have to keep a constant eye on the little one cuz she gets into things. and i just feel like its stressful and unfair. i understand if he was gonna be home with them, but hes gonna be working doubles all weekend every weekend. so its just me and all 4 kids. im not saying i dont want them at all, im just saying i dont think he should have agreed to every weekemd without talking to me about my feelings first.
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jeanetta25
Jeanetta·Мама двоих (8 лет, 16 лет)
No you are not and I think you should talk to him being a new mom is as it is !! Hell being a mom for the second third or etc is hard because each baby is different you have to get to know your baby . That's takes time all by itself then adding on other kids makes it harder . Specially ones of that age that needs attention and still needs to be watched . That's a lot to take on with a newborn specially YOUR FIRST !! I'd talk to him about it you can still get them but not every weekend and maybe or maybe get them for now but once baby comes let y'all both adjust to the huge change get comfortable with the new baby and then his kids can come over every weekend when you know you can handle it with no problem !!
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armywife2
In my opinion, I completely understand where you're frustrated. I would want that time to relax, recover, etc. but, at the same time, I think your boyfriend just wants to make sure his kids see yall's baby as equals if that makes sense? He can't stop seeing his kids because y'all have one together. Not trying to say anything bad whatsoever, but I came from a split home also, and my younger siblings felt the way I'm trying to explain.. Plus, the 10 year old could be SO much help with a newborn! If the first weekend is too much, maybe explain that you'll need rest the following weekend. It'll get figured out. Don't stress about it :)
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