Lindsay
lindsay.mathias89
Lindsay·Многодетная мама (8 детей)
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My husband and I got married in Oct. Quit my full time job in Aug. Been doing temp work but mostly SAHM. He does industrial work and is also 7 yrs older than me. Well he thinks I don't do anything all day or being a SAHM isn't stressful. Feel like the romance is gone. He's always grumpy and never wants to do anything with the kids and I. I take care of 2- 6 kids, depending if kids have school. Our kids are 16months to 10yrs old. My 4 yr old is high functioning and 3 are toddlers. I cook, clean, do all the shopping etc. I'm trying to find a part time job with regular hours. We live in a small town so pickings are slim. Does any other SAHM have this issue? It makes me feel like crap when he acts this way.

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Комментарии

farmers_wife10
Farmers_Wife10·Мама двоих (1 год, 4 года), ждёт третьего

Honestly this may sound ridiculous to some, but it works for me and has worked for others I’ve suggested it to.

Keep a detailed journal of your day. Write in there I got up at x:xx time, child a got up at x:xx time screaming. I made (food) from this time to that time. Child b threw food, child c refused food and insisted I make (food), argued for x amount of time, then (so and so) made this and ate it. Cleaned up food from x:xx to x:xx. Child a and c started fighting, broke up fight at x:xx.

You get the idea every single detail. Food you made, time it took, chores you did, time those took, fights you broke up, errands you ran, taxing you do for the kids, everything in detail so that he gets the full picture.

Don’t stop the journal when he gets home either. Put down everything you do while he’s home too. Do that for a few days to a week.

After 2 days my husband finally asked what I kept writing down. When he saw the detailed list of all I do in 24hours he stopped being a butt about me not doing enough. Since then if he ever gets that way all I have to do is threaten to make another journal or just set my original journal on the counter before he goes to work the next day and he stops immediately.

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ladyfreyja
Andy·Мама троих детей

Lol I was actually thinking about doing this but my husband would go through the whole list of stuff he does at work and compare

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lindsay.mathias89
Lindsay·Многодетная мама (8 детей)

His parents did everything for him growing up. He works his ass off yes but so do I. I used to work full time and do everything at home. I'm trying to find a part time job with the right hours but it's impossible. I take care of his 3 youngest kids but they don't listen to me and treat me like crap because I'm not their mom. His mom used to babysit all the time and never made them do stuff. I was raised very traditional and strict. I only expect them to clean up after themselves and older kids have chores like feed the cat, help with dishes etc but they act like they're going to die. So disrespectful. I try to be as nice and understanding but I can't take it anymore. Can't sleep most nights

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ladyfreyja
Andy·Мама троих детей

That's the same with me. He wants me to work and so do I, but being a stay home mom I have to have a set schedule to work. I have limitations to when I can work. I can't work nights or over nights, I can't work weekends and the only days my mother in law has my older son is Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. So those would be the only days I can work lol. But then when I bitch about not having money he bitches at me to get a job lol. No one is just going to give me a job on only those three days. I have no family alive to help watch kids, so it's just my husbands mother and the baby sitter she pays for twice a week and it's expensive

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anavalenzuela
Ana Valenzuela ·Мама троих детей

I'm a home stay mom and it gets to be alot just hearing kids screaming all. Day... My husband will. Never last

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ladyfreyja
Andy·Мама троих детей

Exactly. It's very demanding and I don't think they get it. And someone is constantly yelling or screaming or crying or having tantrums. All day long.

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anavalenzuela
Ana Valenzuela ·Мама троих детей

@ladyfreyja they don't he leave to another room. When they kids are being loud. But I have to stay and hear them. 🙄

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ladyfreyja
Andy·Мама троих детей

@anavalenzuela ok now that's messed up

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lakota-winyan
dawn·Мама двоих (1 год, 2 года)

One time my husband said something along the lines of “why isn’t dinner ready” the next day I left, pumped enough milk for my daughter for the day and left. When came home my house was a complete mess and dinner wasn’t made. I looked him dead in the eyes and said “where’s my dinner?” “Why haven’t you picked up?” He apologize and never once said anything about the house being messy or dinner not ready. He told me he realizes how hard it is to try and do everything with a child.

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ladyfreyja
Andy·Мама троих детей

@dawnrose lol that's not what he says. It's his place, well technically his mother's.

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lakota-winyan
dawn·Мама двоих (1 год, 2 года)

Then she will have to give you an eviction notice.

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lakota-winyan
dawn·Мама двоих (1 год, 2 года)

@ladyfreyja, you love there. They can’t just kick you out. There are laws that protect us. Look into it. He’s just trying to be controlling.

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ladyfreyja
Andy·Мама троих детей

This sounds like me life. We are always comparing who's jobs harder. Either SAHM or water reclamation (sewer). Lol. My job is 24/7 most of the time. He thinks it's easy because I get to stay home. Also probably thinks I do nothing. I clean up after everyone, cook everyone their separate meals, ect. I also sleep in the same room as my twins.

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ladyfreyja
Andy·Мама троих детей

@lindsay.mathias89 you are strong mama. That must have been awful

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lindsay.mathias89
Lindsay·Многодетная мама (8 детей)
стикер
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lindsay.mathias89
Lindsay·Многодетная мама (8 детей)
стикер
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