@igeerry

1st off I didn't attack you in any way.. all I did was look for clarification of the story you decided to share on social media.

So therefore I no longer feel the need to treat you with kid gloves since you are obviously looking for a fight.

And 2nd off I don't need your "horrible life situation" to make my life better.

I lead a good life and am quite content in it, because I don't make reckless decisions which cause me to go to jail and be separated from my children.

You might want people on the internet to blow sunshine up your ass by telling you that you're the victim in this whole situation... but it isn't what you need... you need a reality check!!!!

For the record you can't be that good of a mother if you allow your children to witness you hitting your husband.. it doesn't matter that it was only once and that it was because you were mad... YOU'RE THE FUCKING ADULT and it's you're job to protect them from such things. How horrible and scary for your kids to see you taken away by the police.

And the cops wouldn't have taken you to jail in the first place if you hadn't lost your temper and hit your husband.. even if your mil would have called the cops anyway.. the police wouldn't have had any reason to arrest you... so that's on you sweatheart.

So put your big girl panties on and show some fucking accountability for YOU'RE ACTIONS and stop blaming everyone and thing around you..

Go to court, show the judge some respect and do what he says.. then go be with your babies and be a better human being for Christ sake.

@igeerry, just the brief glimpses into your life does sound horrible and I don’t envy the position you are in.

You have a choice though. You can choose to use these trials and mistakes to grow as a person and as a mother, or you can continue on a roller coaster of misery.

First of all, regardless of why you were angry or how many times you hit your husband, that’s wrong. It is never okay to be violent. I highly recommend seeking anger management so that you can learn some healthier means to letting out the anger and stress.

Second, I saw something about your man being on drugs. If he is still on drugs and won’t get help, then leave. Your children and you deserve better than that. No good comes from addiction. Loving someone won’t make them well.

If your mother in law is that vile and your husband refuses to follow through on respecting boundaries and you, then leave. You cannot control his actions, and if he won’t honor his word- you have a choice. Leave

Lastly, whatever legal troubles you have and why, take the steps to do what you need to do to sort them in the best way you can.

Ultimately get your life together so you can be the type of mom your kids deserve.

You aren’t a victim. Life is what we make it. You have choice and things can get better and they will if you choose a better path.

Thankyou, I will probably take you up on that offer here and there. Also if you need to talk to someone, I may not seem like I have a lot of knowledge when it comes to that stuff, but I do, and am here for you too

@igeerry, that’s great you are so positive!!! Keeping him away from the ones who enable him are key. He could fall right back down in the hole if he was around the toxic people. I hope everything goes good for you!!!! Like I said I’m here if you want to talk!!! I know addiction is a hard subject

@lincolnsmommy18 wow I'm sorry that happened. I believe it, but I am slowly helping some of the closest people to me come down off it. Cough medicine, and weed are a struggle for some people I love and care so much about. Also another drug, I refuse to be open about. I'm not worried though, sc is what caused things to get better for us the first time we were there. But we are building a life and income for our boys. So in a few months we will have them back in our care, and under our roof, very safe and sound

@igeerry, by no means am I saying to leave him... helping him is the best thing for the situation. You can be his support system. If you want to talk I’m here. It’s a rough road I just wish I would have known my aunt was struggling so I could have helped her before it was to late..

@incognit0, unfortunately their dad is in jail for drug problems, so their grandma has them. They stayed with us for a good 5-6 months after the passing until their grandma could move here from Tennessee. It was a very bad situation. No one knew she had an addiction problem. It started with weed then once that couldn’t control the feeling she moved up the ladder. She had only been using herion for almost a month... it’s a shame and I miss her everyday. This is such a tough subject for me so I would hate to see anyone else go through the pain and suffering and wondering what would have happened if you would of known about the addiction problem.

The drug that he is addicted to is not something that is lethal, but it can be if it isn't used right, doctors use drugs to treat people all the time, and it's all about how much money they are going to get from it when prescribed to their patience. Self medication isn't safe, but you have to give a person that has family members that encouraged it to him as a teenager, time to heal, and it isn't easy when they go into a relapse. I'm done now, my head is starting to hurt from talking about this with all of you. It's nice to speak to someone about what has been going on, but I just need to hear it's going to be okay, don't stop trying, and that's all. Not people condemning me for staying with him cause of his and my choices

@incognit0, thank you. Tomorrow makes 3 years!!!

He has a job now, and that's all that matters, we will be doing good soon. Sometimes it's not easy and I have to talk about it, cause I get very frustrated over what I can't control. But we are good, and we will be good now

Whether you think he’s a dead beat or not. Messing around with drugs is nothing something to take lightly? Especially when you have kids? He wants to be in their life I would think.. so I think getting help and leaving the drugs is the route to go. A court system would not give the kids back if they knew drugs were involved. I’m not trying to be rude or judge mental. I lost an aunt to an overdose and she left behind 3 kids....

Yep, and I'm about to be 18 weeks on tuesday, I have alot together. I will vent when I need to, and you can too. I don't do it that much, just sometimes to stress relieve. I'm okay, but he is not a deadbeat father, we just had to make the decision to send them there. It is hard and sometimes I'm going to sit down and post how I feel about it

What if I do drugs (smoke some) does that make me a dead beat? Really none of you know the actual situation until you've walked the town in my shoes. He is not a deadbeat father, he is working and will continue to do so. Btw, we got pregnant with baby number 3, when my husband, I and our two sons were doing really good. But after his mom found out, she did nothing but try to create extra drama and stress for our family. We plan on going to SC together once we have enough money built up to leave. So when I vent, i don't vent to be judged, I vent for encouragement. My boys are perfectly safe with my family. Here, they wouldn't have a roof over there head, or food in their stomach everyday right now. So with that being said, I can get them back whenever I want. We plan on moving there with our bus tickets in a few months so we will have a place and a good financial situation put together when we get there

Shut up, I went to court today, and it was all dropped, and again I made the decision to send them to SC with thier grampa and grandma. Upon having an eviction notice for too many complaints. My husband may have his issues, and so do i. But who are you to point the finger and say we are dead beat?

We are okay, he got his old job back here so I'm just going to see how that goes, he feels better when he works and treats me better when he feels more like himself. Sorry for how angry I got at everyone. It doesn't help that I'm alone most of the time lately, so I am very depressed. It's all good though, I'm not leaving him

I am not an angry person. However with my ex he was an alcoholic and drug addict. He made me so angry I hit him once. I hated that I reacted that way. I went to therapy and realized if someone’s actions caused me to get violent then that person and I don’t work. I was wrong and I got help. Get some help and leave your husband. He sounds like he isn’t doing you any good.

@igeerry, honestly, you have anger issues. Everyone here is telling you that you CAN get through this. BUT it’s up to you to do this. You have to make better choices. Getting angry and blocking people isn’t going to help your situation. You should be angry at yourself, then you should make peace with that and move on so you can get yourself together.

That is it. Enough, I will block. I never got rid of my boys. I made a really hard decision, so stfu incognit0 and just stop commenting, second of all. Like I've said before no-one has any control over what the Fed up cops do in this area. This is SD, so really just don't comment if you can't say something nice, and I'm not playing victim, I am old enough to know I have learned from what occurred, but I have been bottling it up, so I really just needed to talk to someone about it today. I am tired of all you other mom's that just want to make it sound worse than it is. I am trying not to stress too much either, but I am getting there with no control, cause some of you are making me very mad. So just stop commenting, leave your negativity off my post

@igeerry

1st off I didn't attack you in any way.. all I did was look for clarification of the story you decided to share on social media.

So therefore I no longer feel the need to treat you with kid gloves since you are obviously looking for a fight.

And 2nd off I don't need your "horrible life situation" to make my life better.

I lead a good life and am quite content in it, because I don't make reckless decisions which cause me to go to jail and be separated from my children.

You might want people on the internet to blow sunshine up your ass by telling you that you're the victim in this whole situation... but it isn't what you need... you need a reality check!!!!

For the record you can't be that good of a mother if you allow your children to witness you hitting your husband.. it doesn't matter that it was only once and that it was because you were mad... YOU'RE THE FUCKING ADULT and it's you're job to protect them from such things. How horrible and scary for your kids to see you taken away by the police.

And the cops wouldn't have taken you to jail in the first place if you hadn't lost your temper and hit your husband.. even if your mil would have called the cops anyway.. the police wouldn't have had any reason to arrest you... so that's on you sweatheart.

So put your big girl panties on and show some fucking accountability for YOU'RE ACTIONS and stop blaming everyone and thing around you..

Go to court, show the judge some respect and do what he says.. then go be with your babies and be a better human being for Christ sake.

@igeerry, just the brief glimpses into your life does sound horrible and I don’t envy the position you are in.

You have a choice though. You can choose to use these trials and mistakes to grow as a person and as a mother, or you can continue on a roller coaster of misery.

First of all, regardless of why you were angry or how many times you hit your husband, that’s wrong. It is never okay to be violent. I highly recommend seeking anger management so that you can learn some healthier means to letting out the anger and stress.

Second, I saw something about your man being on drugs. If he is still on drugs and won’t get help, then leave. Your children and you deserve better than that. No good comes from addiction. Loving someone won’t make them well.

If your mother in law is that vile and your husband refuses to follow through on respecting boundaries and you, then leave. You cannot control his actions, and if he won’t honor his word- you have a choice. Leave

Lastly, whatever legal troubles you have and why, take the steps to do what you need to do to sort them in the best way you can.

Ultimately get your life together so you can be the type of mom your kids deserve.

You aren’t a victim. Life is what we make it. You have choice and things can get better and they will if you choose a better path.

It was in March, I paid the penalty for it, I'm done talking to anyone about how hard this is, cause none of you will listen and try and give me some positive encouragement

Yes, and I only hit him once, please tell me by hearing my horrible life situation it's making yours better..

@igeerry

Were your children in the house when you and your mil were screaming at eachother and you were hitting your husband? Did the kids see you taken away by the cops?

@goodleah I hit my husband out of anger when his mom got two inches from my face with her drunk self. I was very stressed out and angry, because we had an agreement that she would go if she were to come back drunk, and be around my baby boys. She instead told me how terrible of a mom I am, how I shouldn't be having another baby and came to just start tons of drama. My husband, sitting there, didnt do anything about it, so yes out of anger, I hit him. And don't go telling me all you mom's are such saints that don't do anything wrong, because look at your posts. I am just as much a human as all the rest of you. I can and will speak my mind, instead of blowing up on someone, off of social media at the wrong time. My mil went to the neighbors and called the police on me. They came, and my husband said I'm not going to press charges. I was very fortunate to only spend one night in jail, and get out the next day. Only to come home when my husband was getting back from work, to go to jail again. That time I spent 4 days in their, because even after all that was through my mil being nowhere to be seen, called again on me. She knew my husband was getting home from work at 3 that day, and it was her time to call, and put me in jail for 4 days. I got out after court on a pr bond, and they kept the no contact order going for a whole month, didn't matter if my husband took the papers in or not. SD is the King of no contact orders and simple assult domestic violience. My husband having no job went back to his drug lifestyle, because they fired him for missing work and staying home with the kids when I was put in jail. He couldn't be home with our boys or me for so long. So there is the FULL story. Happy, seems like all I wanted was a little positivity and all I got was a bunch of mom's looking for some HOT drama

@igeerry, I don’t really understand what you’re going through, so it’s hard to say if I can commiserate. For some positive words though: life is what you choose to make of it. If you work hard and focus on your goals- you can achieve them. There will be brick walls along the way, but they’re not there to stop you. They’re there to see just how badly you want things. Sometimes it’s not what you pictured, but you’ll get exactly what you’ve worked for.

@incognit0 all I'm going to say is its not, that's why I'm ranting. So that's all I need to say and just let it be. Sorry I didn't think it was such crime to ask for some positivity from other mom's who have possibly been through what I'm going through

Why would you have your children live with someone else due to a financial situation? Your last post is asking if other women deal with their SO having a drug addiction and a hard time admitting it. Is that the real reason your children aren't with you? Because I don't understand how your MIL got a no contact order for you just yelling at her. You usually have to have evidence someone is a threat to your safety to get a no contact order. This whole post makes no sense. You must be leaving something out. 🤷

So let me just try to understand this: your MIL is keeping things at your home, comes back drunk and you yelled at her. She gets a no contact order and the judge was supposed to lift it, but didn’t in error. So you violated it and went to jail. Now you have court.

How did you violate it? Did you know it hadn’t been lifted? Did you have prof it should have been?

@skymomof4 thankyou, I really needed to hear that. My boys are in my parents care, because my husband and I had a terrible home/financial situation occur, so we made the decision to send them with my dad

If youre going to share personal info like that be prepared to hear both criticism and support. Thats how social media works. Idk what happened but im sure it isnt good. Deal with the court and be respectful to the judge or things will be worse for you. Good luck

I am just running my mind, do you honestly think I'm going to do that? I'm just fed up, and fyi the reason there WAS a no contact order is because of my mother in law, who caused so much hell to break loose and nothing I did or said changed that. Didn't matter if my husband understood that I am pregnant, and going through so much stress with her just parking all of her ish at my place back then, and going out to drink. Then coming back with her bf to tell me off, I was seriously poed, and I had every right to be. So please don't tell me the no contact order is serious and had something serious happen that resulted in it in the first place. I am very much aware of that, I haven't had anytime to just speak my mind about it, because everyone I talk to shoots me down

I agree. Honestly, if I were you I’d wanna get on the judges good side cause remember he has the power.

I can’t imagine what you are going through. I hope everything goes well ❤️ Good luck.

I don’t know your story but a no contact order isn’t easy to get where I live so there must have been something serious going on. Acting foolish and telling of a judge or going against court orders is just going to cause you more issues than it’s worth and I’m sure you’d be better off just dealing with things in a calm fashion rather than end up locked up over some drama