As I'm getting to the very end of my pregnancy and I think about being a mother. All the wrong that was done to me and is still being done and thrown in my face with my dad bothers me more and more.
He was in my life growing up, my parents were for the most part together, but he wasnt actually there. My mom raised and disciplined me. He didn't bother with me at all. as I got older I grew hatred towards him more and more.
now that I've burried those feelings and realized it is what it is, it's killing me to see him doing EVERYTHING he NEVER did for me, with my sister.
Things my mom would of beat my ass for growing up, my sister does daily. My dad kisses the ground she walks on and would mentally abuse me all of the time when I was her age.
He continues to doubt me and just treat me the way he always has. but now that I see him treating my sister so much better, it fuckin kills me.
how can you treat your children so differently? what the fuck did I do wrong to make him feel a certain way towards me. I'll never have resentment towards my sister, envy? sometimes, but I love her little ass, my dad though? sometimes I can't stand the thought of him.
sigh...
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I'm an open person and nobody is afraid to say how the feel around here, I've said something about it plenty of times and it either gets blamed on me being a mean kid or just ignored. which to me Is both bullshit!
This seems to be pretty common sadly 😔 and then the younger ones just end up being little brats and problems because they don't get disciplined
I was the baby in my family and didn't have a great relationship with my dad. I used to beg my mom to divorce him. He treated my older siblings perfect and they were just his step kids. It was until I got pregnant with my daughter that we developed a strong bond. He took care of me my whole pregnancy and just absolutely loved my daughter. Sadly he ended up dying of cancer a year later and he begged me to forgive him for every fight or arguement we ever had. He made sure to tell me he loved me and I did the same til he passed. My word of advice is don't give up on him. You never know when hes going to be gone. Tbh I actually miss my dad arguing with me lol