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Jessica
Jessica
В ожидании первенца

My husband doesn't understand why I only want my in laws to stay 3 days tops when the baby is born. They live 3 hours…

My husband doesn't understand why I only want my in laws to stay 3 days tops when the baby is born. They live 3 hours away. I completely understand how it's an exciting time for them. I want them to see their grandchild. I just don't want them here for an extended stay. I don't need to worry about guests in my house when I have just become a new mother. I am hopeful that my mom or stepmother would be able to make it and stay for a few weeks. (They would be coming from half way across the country). However, they would primarily be there to help me recover from childbirth, household chores, etc. Also, they cannot easily return to see their grandson. Another side note, I am still getting used to my in laws. I think I have seen them 7 times in the last 3 years, plus my MIL was taking crap about me at our wedding behind my back. I had only met her twice at that point. (I am really a quite shy person, but I understand she felt like she was losing her son). So stressed out now. 😕

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vjsoto

VickiВ ожидании первенца

I totally agree with you! I hope everything ends up going well for you!! And thank you :)

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jjbutton

JessicaВ ожидании первенца

@reaganmommy2015, thank you! 😊

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jjbutton

JessicaВ ожидании первенца

@vjsoto, I don't think they truly understand how wonderful but Difficult this time can be. Maybe I worry too much, but I don't want to feel cornered into things that will stress me out more... On a side note....about holidays. Your statement reminded me of my dad. My brother was a premi -32 weeks. When my parents finally brought him home my dad didn't want anyone around him. The family was planning a birthday celebration for my dads father, but my dad didn't want to take the baby. He told everyone the doctor said he shouldn't be around crowds. lol. So they stayed home. Good luck and thanks for venting with me. 😊

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reaganmommy2015

Martee 💋💋Мама двоих (4 года, 9 лет), ждёт третьего

You have a right to only want them there for a few days after that is just to much for new parents

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vjsoto

VickiВ ожидании первенца

Yeah my baby is due around Christmas time, so I don't think I'm gonna be in the "family" mood this year. My husband is a bit more understanding but I can also tell that it bothers him. I just don't care much about what he thinks regarding that because he's not the one going through the pain or labor.

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jjbutton

JessicaВ ожидании первенца

My husband seems to think it's a great time for all the grandmas to socialize and have a great time....Um, this is can be done in the first few days when before we come home from the hospital. It's not the time afterwards. He even agreed, his mom does not need to be taking care of me and helping me with very personal stuff. We don't have that relationship. My husband said he would support my decision, but I can tell he doesn't understand. If I can see it in his face his mother will too! I don't need this to create a bigger problem with her. I told my husband we are going to have this conversation again until he understands. @vjsoto Hopefully your husband will understand your concerns.

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vjsoto

VickiВ ожидании первенца

I feel exactly the same. I don't want to be bothered by my in laws, especially when I'm recovering from child birth because that process alone is a struggle. I would much rather have my mom here because she'll help me with my household stuff instead of smothering my baby and not letting me rest.

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