Mom.life
Natasha
no062014
Natasha
So i posted a few days ago about my best friend wanting updates every 2-3hrs while im in labor and deliver and that she was supposed to watch my oldest. Mil got clearance from work to leave anytime she needs to from now till i deliver. She has the week before and after my due date off from work.

I did end up in labor Thursday night. I have prodromal labor, which is fun. But mil was here in 10 mins and not a peep. Her only ask was to let her know we made it to the hospital safely and if they were sending me home. Which we did. Thats it!

I did talk to my therapist and was informed i definitely was not a jerk and that what i wanted to do was not out of the ordinary. She feels i was manipulated and now worried i will develop further anxiety after my friend using her family members situation to try and use it to demand updates. She states friend needs to handle that with her own therapist and that her even knowing im in labor would more then likely send her into a spiral regardless.

I was gentle in the message i sent friend that we both have a hard boundary and i understand not being comfortable watching my oldest and that i do have other childcare lined up.

Apparently my boundary is to much and now she is upset about not being in the inside circle (no one is but childcare and hubby), and not being able to help with the baby where she could take baby overnight (didnt need that or help with the oldest when we got home), so she would then be company to us and our guest.

Mil knows once we get home she is heading home. And that was her saying that not me asking.
15.10.2023

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mswedes
mswedes
Your friend sounds coo coo bananas
15.10.2023 Нравится Ответить
no062014
no062014
My previous post the person thought I was a jerk. She came completely unhinged. Said her therapist told her my request is nuts. I told her she would obviously know when we went to the hospital and when I got to recovery. But after a family member of hers had a complication she freaked, asked me if we could update her every 2-3 hrs as to my health status. I said no and she went behind my back to my husband with the same request. My husband not having talked to me first said he will see what he can do. He and I talked it over. He started putting a plan in place then told my friend we wouldn't need her any longer and we would let her know when we were ready for visitors.

I trusted her bc she is a nanny. But she does have bi polar disorder and her boyfriend just informed me she hadn't been taking her medications so he was worried about her coming out for 3 weeks and having a manic episode and looking after my daughter. I appreciate him letting me know as of an hr ago.

So I'm more at peace at least. Mil has the freedom from work, I don't feel obligated to allow for "help" either
16.10.2023 Нравится Ответить
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