I'm 24 and I have a 4 year old son with my ex. We were engaged but the relationship was on and off for almost 8 years. I started seeing someone new and he seemed perfect at the begining. He was very thoughtful, affectionate and he seemed to get along with my child and family. I already had an appointment scheduled with womens health to go back on birth control, the guy I was dating said condoms were trash so he would not wear one. I went against my better judgment and slept with him twice before I got pregnant. When I first told him he was a little cold, I found out I was pregnant 10 DPO. Less then a week after I told him I was pregnant he broke up with me over the phone because "he's still in love with someone else". I talk to him on a regular basis and he wants us to be best friends. He comes to all of the baby apts but he can also be very mean. If I say something he does not like he starts screaming out me and gets himself worked up to the point he will start punching himself in the face. He's told me at least 3 different times hes going to go kill himself after I try to tell him how I feel or he tells me im selfish and dont care about anyone else but myself. Recently I started sleeping with him again, my hormones are going crazy and im trying to justify it by telling myself im sleeping with my babys father so its okay. Sometimes tho I get so sad about the situation between him and myself I dont know if I am doing the right thing. What would you do?
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I can say this, I seen red flags with my husband while we were dating but I justified every red flag. Now we’re married and I deal with things I shouldn’t be. He’s not physically abusive but he’s abusive in other ways (verbally, financially, etc)
IT IS NOT FUN!
This guy sounds very unstable and you definitely don’t want to be stuck with him later on. You don’t even have to give your child his last name.
Don’t be his booty call. You deserve more than that even if he is attending every appointment. Anyone suicidal needs help and when that baby gets here you don’t need that kind of negativity for you or the baby.
He’s manipulating you into doing whatever he wants by seeming attentive but he quickly turns on you the instant you don’t give in. My husband does this. it’s exhausting. Don’t commit to him.
If he will punch himself what would stop him from punching you, your son or the new baby? That’s a horrifying thought. RUN FAR, FAR AWAY!
Girl, hes gotta go. He sounds like a sociopath. He is not safe for you or your children regardless of if he is the father of one or not. All he is ever going to do is make you feel guilty about everything threaten to hurt himself when he doesn't get his way and he will never change you and your children will never be happy or safe
Yeah i agree stop having sex with him. It just confuses things. Set boundaries and be stern with him that if he's in love with someone else then he needs to have sex with that person instead of you. People are only gonna treat you how you allow them to treat you. Call and yall only about the baby and nothing more. And insist that he gets help for his mental health....Best of luck to you mama.
I'd separate myself from him ASAP! He's not stable with you and he won't be stable with the baby either.
Stop sleeping with him. Separate yourself from him unless it involves your child, there needs to be no other involvement. When your child arrives and you get settled, get yourself to the courthouse and get your custody and visitation paperwork filed to protect all parties involved. He’s toxic.
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so yes ima go hard in the comments bec...
Girl... please stop sleeping with him. Please! I wouldn’t even communicate with his ass. If need be, I would get the courts involved. I mean his inflicting pain on to himself. He definitely would do the same to you and your babies. Pray the Lord gives you strength and wisdom to leave, not now... but RIGHT NOW