??? you women crack me up!

Dont even think we were dating before i farted ?? alcohol brings out the best of me ???

@ice he imitates me when I snored- I had a stuffy nose from my allergies and snored when I slept. But I fell asleep on him on the couch while he was gaming and kept imitating me til I woke up ??.

But I'd wipe his ass too. I'm just very shy when it comes to farting. I poop at his house, but never witnessed me before because every time i had to go, he was at work lol. And I pee in front of him. But farting is a no lol. Just very shy about it lol. He told me earlier "you've been cleaning my apartment all week, from doing dishes to getting on your hands and knees cleaning up a mess my room mate made in the fridge, you deserve to at least toot once in front of me." ???

Btw my beautiful 4 yr ild dd thinks it hilarious when she farts. She has to say she did after she does it.

??

What?! That long? Hahhahahhahahhahahahaha sheesh.

My DF and I have seen each other and heard eachother,

Fart

Take a s*** (toilet)

Belch

Snore

Drool

Fart sneeze

Pee from laughter (as in only meeee lmao)

Gosh, we are human and shall be ourselves around our mates. I'd wipe DF's ass when he is too dam old to do it. Hhhahhahahhaahahhahaha

Lol I farted on my SOs face a couple weeks after been together we wrestling and he squished it out ???

Just do it more often and he won't tease you. If you're only farting once every 3 years of course there's going to be a big hurrah around it.

My DH has only heard me fart (that in aware of) once. I was drunk and he carried me too bed when I was asleep, literally threw me into the bed and I farted. That was 5 years ago.

Although he's probably acting like he hasn't heard those sneaky "cough farts".

My husband said he didn't know girls farted till he met me lol. Unfortunately I'm lactose intolerant and love my cheese lol. So I've always been kind of a gassy person. With this pregnancy I've been super gassy. It's to the point where im getting really annoyed about it. Then the smell doesn't help either. I've had some come out and the sound it makes shocks me. I didn't think a human being could make such a noise. I know it sounds gross but it is what it is. Honestly I'm busting some out as I type this. I never however do it in public. I will def hold it in till I get somewhere alone. Hey my hubby knew what he was getting himself into lol. Accidently farted on him the first week we were dating. Omg I was sooo embarrassed.

Y'all are so classy, lol! My husband found out very early on that I'm not going to hold it in. Especially if I'm at home! Over the years he's just like, "You're gross" and keeps it moving, but at first he was so disgusted that a female did that.

Lmao. ??????

It happens, girl. It happens.

Was laying with bd and he said "my stomach hurts....like really bad...." So i put my hand on his stomach and pushed down and he farted really loud and i went "i could be a school nurse" he was like "...ya i feel alot better now" lol. I still havent farted in front of him. I mean. I may have done it in my sleep but hes never let me know lol

I've been with my SO for 6 years now and he's heard it a few times. I'm not a naturally gassy person though so that's why. I don't have a problem with it, as long as it's not while we're eating lol. He does it ALL the time haha. Apparently I do it more often in my sleep, especially while pregnant. If I am awake and it happens he just laughs and says, "I heard your butt."

He's seen me in worse shape than a fart here and there. I can't imagine sharing my life with someone and never having things like that happen. Idk how some women do that lol.

I'm sorry this made me laugh so hard.

I think I win this one..We have been married 40years ,and I have never done that in front of my husband ..or children for that matter...

I blamed it on the the pregnancy ??

But he keeps bringing it up ?

I know your embarrassment all to well. SO and I have been together for 6 years and he heard me fart for the first time this past pregnancy. I was seriously mortified ?

We've always farted around each other I think about 6 months in we were naked about to DTD and I got on top of him and let out the hugest loudest fart right on his you know. He just laughed and hugged me and said it was cute lol

OP now y ur relationship is on a different level ???

My 91 year old great-grandfather chuckled like a kid when my son tooted on him. His words exactly, "I don't care how old a person may be, but that is always funny and I don't know why." ? (He was a great man! I miss him dearly)

Sorry OP. I've been with the same man 10yrs. He's watched me give birth 3 times. He's too comfortable about it honestly. It doesn't bother me either way.

It's okay. I use to be a little shy too. But, not so much anymore. Actually, he told me I done it in my sleep after 2wks of dating. Soooo, yep! What can you do? ?

My husband first heard me fart after like a week. We were play fighting and he got me round the tummy and squeezed a little too hard ?

DF and I have competitions of who's fart is better. ? But we're gross lmao we got comfortable with each other fairly quick.

I made it a week. We were hanging out at my house watching a movie late one night (I worked until midnight so I was exhausted but still wanted to see him) I was passed out and let out a loud fart. He didn't tell me til next day. Just laughed it off. Not even embarrassed.

I had food poisoning in the first month I started dating my now husband. He heard many noises. That will be 11 years ago this summer!

I don't get farting. I don't fart like ever. I just don't really have to.

We have a no farting at the table rule for the dh and kids.

I don't mind farts but I don't find them funny or amusing.

Lol I don't fart in front of my so either ? I was brought up that it was impolite to fart in front of others. When I was pregnant I would fart in my sleep and he used to make fun of me? I would get so embarrassed. Other than that time in my sleep I refused to do it in front of him I get so shy

Man your relationships all sound stressful lol. I farted on the first day we hung out, we do it in front of each other all the time. Never been a big deal for us!

Here for the comments. You ladies are hilarious...ahhhhhh coffee and baby bump! ☺☕

OMG I'm crying reading these comments! ? I've shared everything with my hubby for the past 13 yrs fluffs included. Hubby squashed me during sex a month ago & I fluffed! I couldn't stop laughing it totally ruined the moment. I just blamed it on the baby! ?

It's just idk. I know he'll keep making a huge deal out of it ?? and I don't want that to happen ???

I can't even imagine holding in my Farts. We gave an open door policy here. Feel free to fart, poop, pick your nose. Just not allowed to eat it. ?

???? I love u right now

He watched me push his baby out my vag. He can handle a toot. ???

I think I made it a couple weeks into us dating before I farted in front of him though. He broke the ice by doing it first lmao.

I accidentally farted on my husband about 7 months in. Like, naked spooning, bare-assed, farted on his junk. ? He tickled me, I couldn't help it.

I just woke my husband up with a big fart. Then he did a little fart and said "our butts are communicating."

It's no big deal for us. We have plenty of manners, but there's no reason for one of us to be uncomfortable trying to hold in gas when it's just the two of us.

We've had to do a lot more "embarrassing" things for each other in the course of our marriage. Farting ain't got nothing on me being spread eagle on the bathroom floor so my husband could shave me.

When I was 23 weeks ( two weeks ago ) after eating Burger King, I got really nauseous and made dh stop the car so I could throw up so I'm bending down out the car mind you my ass was facing him and while I was puking I accidentally let out a big crusty sour fart RIGHT IN HIS FACEEE! First and last time he has ever heard me lol

My first time was 2 years after we met. I was in labor and farted my first push. I stopped pushing to apologize.....I was so embarrassed

My husband and I have been together for 9+ years and I have to admit it happened to me about 3 months ago. Also, it wasn't just him, my sil was right there too. We were just standing around talking (I was 8 months pregnant) and it just happened, absolutely no warning, I was as shocked as they were! Lol, my hubby gave me a shocked look and my sil laughed, I still blame the baby for it since it was so out of nowhere.

10 years together, married for two and I was pregnant. Hasn't happened since. He will never let you live it down!

See I'm one of those that has never done it in front of my husband but it's not that I'm embarrassed anymore. It's that if it ever DID happen he's been anticipating it for so long that he would make a huuuuge deal out of it. I can hear it now.. The laughing, the taunting, the proclamations of "Youuu farted!!! Finally!!!!" Ugh I just can't. Can't do it. I'll hold it in until I die lol

Lmaoooo

iMiss, in my case, no. Like I said, we think it's bad manners, so he doesn't either. My biggest thing is that it turns me off! I actually dumped a guy years ago because he did it, often, and I just didn't want to touch him anymore. ?

Lmfaoooo!!!! At least now you can let it go any time no more hiding it ???

Ugh I feel you. I can't even hold them in or anything now in my third trimester they just come out ? it's horrifying. I'm not one to fart in front of ANYONE

My SO tells me to just do it lol. He says I fart in my sleep so why not do it when awake and I said "because I don't like doing that in front of people"

He said everyone does it, he even farts in front of me. It's just I'm scared to get out my comfort zone.

So all you ladies who are embarrassed to fart in front of your dh/so... Does he fart in front of you? I don't get the expectation that women shouldnt fart. Better out than in I always say!

I've lived with my husband for 10 years, and I've never done that. Not once. But we are pretty big on manners.

I didn't even fart in front of my parents or sibling even they have only heard me fart once when my dad was cracking my back he pushed to hard and made me fart he still makes fun of me about that and I was 10-11 when it happened

My SO has never heard me either in the 3 years we have lived together lol it's less of an embarrassing thing more of that's just fu*king rude... I get so mad when he does it around me like go to another room with that please.

It's natural, everyone does it!

I made it 2.5 days before farting in front of my DH...

2.5 weeks before farting ON him. ?

It's just how I am. My friends don't even hear me fart. Known my best friend for 13 years, she hasn't heard me fart.

I farted on our 2nd date. He laughed, thank goodness. 12 years later, we do it in front of each other all the time.

Oh my lord. How'd you make it so long???? I farted the first day we hung out

I'll never understand this whole being too embarrassed to fart in front of your SO/df/dh. Like you can get naked and sex all over each other, but a tiny little fart is cringe worthy embarrassing? I don't get it lol.

I've always tried to not let him hear me dart because I feel like somethings should remain a mystery you know? Lol but my husband came and gave me a kiss after work the other day and patted me on the butt and it just came out of NO WHERE. Honestly at this point in my pregnancy the mystery is dead because it's too hard to hold it together. I'm a gas monster these days. ???

It happened to me after 11 years, during my 4th pregnancy and it was sooooo embarrassing!

I didn't make it very long at all with my boyfriend. The sneeze fart did me in. ??

??? he knows I've been gassy but he didn't know that I was REALLY gassy ????

He won't let me live it down for the rest of my life ??

Omg how embarrassing my husband has only heard me fart in my sleep and that started when I was pregnant with my first he says he's waiting for it to happen and he's going to make fun of me when it happens it's been 5 years I hope it doesn't happen anytime soon it took 3 years for him to know When I was having a bm and that was because I had horrible constipation after delivery so I was there for a really long time so for 3 years he asked me if I ever popped and would say he didn't believe I did because I was always in and out of the restroom

We were together almost 3 years. To this day he's only heard me fart that one time. ?

Lol mine happened after only a couple weeks

Like he heard it. It was quiet in. The room???

Just yell April fools then run and hide ?

Wow, I think I made it 2.5 weeks ?

That happened to me he wouldn't of known I had farted if I wouldn't of said anything. Haha I know how it feels ?