Kaitlyn Dillon
mrsdillon
Kaitlyn Dillon·Мама дочки (1 год)

I need some advice ladies..

Okay, so my first child which is my daughter when she was born my mother and father was both in the room when I delivered her. (Which I wanted it really to just be my husband and me in the room to experience it alone) while they could wait in the waiting room. Well they slid past my feelings and basically forced their way to be in there and threatened me and said that if I didn't let them then "they wouldn't come period" well I let it slide and let them. When she was born and cleaned etc and after me and baby got our skin to skin bonding time my husband wanted to hold her, well he did for not even 30 seconds and my mom grabbed her out of his hands and said he was "hogging" her. Then invited all family during the time I was being stitched up (went natural) and they all barged in the door with my hoo ha out being stitched (I was mad currently) and my husband finally didn't get to hold her until they all left 3 1/2 hours later. I didn't even get to hold her besides the 30 minute skin to skin contact time. My husbands family couldn't even come because my mother doesn't like them. My nlaws couldn't even show up (my daughters other grandma and papaw) because my parents didn't like them. She doesn't like them for no reason. I don't understand. She doesn't want to "share her "grandbaby" Now I'm currently 18 going on 19 weeks pregnant with a little boy and my doctor next week is wanting to start talking about my birth plan and this time I have absolutely made my mind up of finally not letting anyone run over my plans or me. I told her today that nobody will be in the delivery room besides me, my husband and my (1) year old little girl and that we wanted at least an hour to ourselves before people started barging in because I want time to get cleaned up and stitched up and into some pajamas and for me and my husband and daughter to love and hold him for a tad bit for ourselves and for our time with baby before anybody else and that his family can be there with my family together to all share the moments together.. Well she got really mad at me and yelling and saying that to tell my husband "thanks" for not allowing them in the room. I explain to tell her me and him both decided it not just him. And then she continued to say "I won't be there" "don't expect me there" "I'm not coming" "thanks a lot" "it's not your choice" what should I do or say mama's I'm tired of being ran over and controlled when I'm a woman, married, with two beautiful babies, on our own, our own home, cars, jobs etc. I'm 21. I don't understand why she can't respect us. 😞

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Комментарии

mrsdillon
Kaitlyn Dillon·Мама дочки (1 год)

Thank you ladies for the support!! ♥️♥️ My mother told me today that she "respects my decision but she wants me to respect her decision" her decision was that she refuses to come to the hospital when he is born and she also decided she won't come see him at the hospital either. Then she continued to say, "maybe I can see him around or something down the road" and "she won't be close or love my son like she does my daughter" that's when I really put my foot down and told her if she can't accept one of my children then she can't accept either of them. Then she asked one more time. "So me and your dad for sure can't be in the room?" I said "no you won't, y'all will be in the waiting room with the rest of the family, please respect my decision" then she told me she didn't and that she's done with me. So I walked out and went home and loved on my babygirl and rubbed on my son. My mother will not treat my kids unfairly and won't love one more than the other and WONT have favorites. If she can't accept and love them equally then I guess she won't be in either lives of my babies. It hurts for me to even consider it but nobody disrespects my children. I love my mom to death but good lord.😞

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harleyann
Harley Snook·В ожидании первенца

I'm really sorry you have to deal with this from your own mother. But manipulation like that is NEVER healthy. I know it's hard but you gotta put your foot down and stick to your guns now. She will most likely come around eventually but even if she doesn't, it's her loss.

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mrsdillon
Kaitlyn Dillon·Мама дочки (1 год)

Well it's official I guess me and my mother are no longer in contact. My dad won't speak to me because she filled his head with BS. She blocked me on Facebook, blocked my number and before she did it all she told me she never wanted to see my face again and don't want to even know if Jayce exists. Told me it wasn't fair to her and that she knew she had a gut feeling why she "doesn't love him" I can't really even type because I'm in such tears. 😞

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brandie69.br.br
Brandie Roberts·Мама троих детей

momma my mom was the same way n she should up wen I had my daughter even after she was being hateful n saying mean things but she was only n the room for maybe five minutes looked at her n walked out

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mrscruz0530
🎀Jacqui🎀·Мама дочки-младенца

You made the right choice and she needs your decisions. The fact that she's saying she wants nothing to do with him should make you reevaluate that relationship because your son did nothing to deserve that. If she can't put her problems aside for the beautiful blessing coming into this world then maybe it's best if she doesn't go. It's obviously easier said than done but if you let her have her way then you will have that regret for a very long time. You are your own person and you have your own family and that's what you have to put first no matter what.

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jcandbabye
Jillian·В ожидании первенца

@mrsdillon Tell her if she cant be mature enough to sit her butt out in that waiting room and respect yours and your SOs decision then she doesnt have to come. Just let her know if she doesnt come dont expect you to let her have any part in her grandchilds life.

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haleyjordan825
Haley·В ожидании первенца

it's not.about them it's Bout what makes you comfortable what you want the experience to.be like . I'd tell them that's how.it is whether they like it or not they can either come see their grandbaby or don't for selfish reasons

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mrsdillon
Kaitlyn Dillon·Мама дочки (1 год)

Thank you! ♥️ she is just giving me the guilt trip. She told me currently she doesn't want nothing to do with him and that don't ask for her to even come see him and that she won't be there period and that she won't go to anymore appointments with me. (So I wouldn't have To go alone) I am so torn that she would even say this towards me.

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harleyann
Harley Snook·В ожидании первенца

I think you did exactly what you needed to. Don't give in, let the nurses know what you want so they can't just come in. I have lots of rules for my delivery and no one gets a say. You need to do what you want so you guys can enjoy it. It's not fair for them to control your moment. If they decide not to show up, that's on them. They'll regret it later on.

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