I have an 8yr old but before him I had a stillbirth; my daughter, it's been 9yrs and trust me things don't get better…
I have an 8yr old but before him I had a stillbirth; my daughter, it's been 9yrs and trust me things don't get better just easier (time has shown me that) fast forward to now I am married expecting my first baby with my husband... but my sons pregnancy was not easy! I was stressed, the anxiety of losing him was hard. This pregnancy is no different. I can't get excited for fear of losing the baby, i can't go pee without thinking 'is this it? will i see blood?' every doctors appt i think what if i hear those words that still resonate in my head 'there is no heartbeat' but what bothers me the most is his family doesn't get it!!! they are over the moon and i get it, it's his first child but dammit respect the fact that if i want to keep in the down low for now you need to respect that! next thing i know i have extended family texting congrats! they are sending pictures of cribs and strollers, planning a baby shower! STOP!!! i want to yell and scream!! his sister giving me deadlines by March you should know the sex i need to know the sex for this and that.. and i want to yell 'listen let me get to March first!!' they think i am exaggerating but unless you gave birth to your dead child there is no way you will understand... they only build on my anxiety and i just don't know how to make them slow down.... sorry; end of rant😭😭😭
Karla·
Мама сына (8 лет)
thank you @hellosweetie
Alexandra McMillan·
Мама двоих (младенец), ждёт третьего
What happened to their child is tragic, but no one should EVER compare and say their pain is worse than someone else's. They will never understand your pain, I'm so sorry at how hurtful they are being...you're a great mom and I have faith that you will give birth to a beautiful, healthy baby and some day you will see your little angel girl again 😇 if you need someone to vent to just shoot me a message.
Karla·
Мама сына (8 лет)
@hellosweetie, thanks, and he's tried but his sister just says 'it's not like it will happen again, she already had a healthy boy" i almost lost it... like really?! is that supposed to make it easy cuz for 8mo my daughter had a strong and healthy heart so unless you can assure me somehow shut up!!! so i dont know why they don't get it because they are mothers themselves... i dont know; about 2yrs ago my husbands brother lost his 8yr old boy in a car accident and in an effort to help his wife I told her 'i get it, it won't get better but trust me it will be easier' her response was that my loss wasn't the same... I bit my tounge and didn't say anything... and his sister agreed with her that her pain was far worse... what they fail to see is that I would have given anything to hear my daughter cry, see her smile, run and play! i got deprived of all that!!! thank god i met her 5lb 7oz body smelled her skin and all that gorgeous thick hair she had... but if they ask me i give you 8yrs or none at all please give me the 8... i was choosing a box the next day instead of what she was to wear... like where do you get off in thinking my pain was nothing... i am just losing it😢
Alexandra McMillan·
Мама двоих (младенец), ждёт третьего
Moved me to tears sweetie...I can't imagine your pain, anyone who is a mother should understand this, just thinking about this happening to my little girl breaks my heart, I'm literally tearing up imagining....they need to have more respect for your loss, and there is nothing wrong with how you feel! Can your man talk to them and tell them to give you more space on this issue??