@northernmama youre so sweet thanks lil mama

@denessev girl we basically have the same life. my man cones home eats and talks to the kids and sleep. there is not us time at all my hubby doesn't have a phone he's weird like that so I barely get to talk to him. i leave him notes in his pockets or hoodies thats how I've been able to explain my feelings lately

@virgosweetness To be honest a Momma got to be happy. You matter too. I'm not saying leave or stay you got to decide what you want. it will hurt all together but that won't last your whole life you deserve to be happy. . And i agree with you on connecting. sex and emotional connection means alot to me and sex he could care less about. which is what I'm having a problem with. ever since we had kids our sex life went down the drain. like we still do it everyday but its just a quickie to get our fix. not fun fun sexy time any more

@northernmama i feel like im not in love with him no more. He works out of town m-f and i only see him on weekends. He is so good to us besides we r not connecting sexually , romantically, emotionally. But thats a biggie for me. I am like i can fake it for my family or break some hearts and both those options suck. Im lost in my head.

@virgosweetness Denifity don't give up. I know its hard. that's why we have this app for support. i got you. so hang in there . I'm trying too

@sammybumblebee @sammybumblebee Thank you I will definitely look into that! thanks for your help and response.

@northernmama, I told my husband that! I told him that we felt like roommates with benefits and he looked at me like I was crazy. He goes to work, comes home to sleep, then off to work again! He’ll try to stay up for a bit so he can play with the kids and I love that but I feel like there is no “us” time. He is ALWAYS tired. Our life is literally texting. His days off are out of wack too because he is used to his night schedule. Sorry, I know it’s hard.

@mrschanandlerbong95 Yess. I know he loves me. he shows me by providing and supporting us and letting us do anything buts the connection. my husband was never the type for affection or mushy lovey stuff. but he will have his days were I feel like the top of the world. and with me being pregnant I need that right now. my self esteem is low.

@paige_1999 I agree. we are pretty open and straight up and fulfill each other needs. its the connection we are slacking. he works alot and my man isnt the affectionate sensitive person he not the mushy type lol. maybe when im lucky rarely. i just miss our talks and time together. he works alot so I rarely get anytime adult convos or dates nights anymore probably won't happens till another few months

its just him working alot is taking a toll on me right now.

@kaytibug2009 Yess its the connection! I feel you. thank you for his service and thank you for being strong for him.

@denessev Girl I swear my hubby and your man work at the same job. my husband works from midnight to 5pm to 7pm everyday with one day off maybe most likel6 not. he works for a big company so this past few months been hard on us. with me working and taking care of the kids and barely seeing him I miss him and I miss the connection rigjt now I feel like we are roommates with benefits.

@cmurdaa3615 Yess! I miss the connection the emotional and physical connection. my husband works and sleeps.. like I will fulfill his needs you know but then off to sleep. He works from Midnight to 5pm everyday maybe 1 day off. so we don't see eachother alot.

@lii94 my husband did that too when we got married. probably just overwhelmed they take it more different

Story of my life and i dont know what to do. I want to feel loved, desired, i want passion. He takes good care of us and is so kind but there is no passion at all.

@mrschanandlerbong95, I was reading through all these replies saying in my head “it’s two different love languages!!!” @northernmama, He’s showing you he loves you with acts of service but maybe you’re more quality time. That can be hard for men to pinpoint because he sees acts of service as the ultimate showing of love. Tell him specific things and actions that make you feel loved. I would highly recommend the book the five languages of love, totally changed my relationship!

2 words. LOVE LANGUAGES. He thinks that supporting you and providing for you is him showing you love and affection, and it is, but not the way that you need it.

@lii94 good work for doing so honey, I'm ghb lad you made your partner see what's wrong and what can be done to correct it. No they dont realize and that's why us ladies need to show our partners and tell them, otherwise they ain't going to figure it out. We are all human, we arent perfect.

@paige_1999 i agree i opened up to my hubby to be earlier today and told him how i was feeling and understood he is the only one working right now and its stressful but he should be communicating with me regardless. Not just mhm. Makes me feel unheard/ not needed. Also told him i need adult conversation since a 6m old isnt quite the best at holding up a convo. And you saw the oh shit moment go across his face.

Guess they dont realize what they're doing when they're doing it 🤷

Maybe y'all need to ask your partners for the personal attention once the kiddies go to bed for the night. I've been in the similar position as you ladies and all it has took is for me to sit my partner down and tell him. I now get a lot of personal time with my partner once our kiddo goes to bed for the night. Even if it is snuggles on the couch watching a movie, playing the xbox together, having a shower together or just simple snuggles in bed while catching each other up on our week/day. Men can not read our minds and nor can we read theirs. Sit down and make your partners sit down and talk to them. Stay up till they get home if you must to talk to them. Do what you need to do to talk to them.

At times I understand. My husband not only works 16 hr shifts, but also the military is shipping him out for 6 months as of the end of this month. Then he'll come back for 3 weeks and then will be off to another country for 9 months. I'm blessed that he loves me and provides for us and I can be a stay home mom... I just hate that he's gone so much and I miss our connection we use to have.

I go through this daily.

I know exactly how you feel. He does EVERYTHING to provide for us and I appreciate it. I know he loves me but I miss his presence, the attention that he would give me. He is just so tired and I understand that but it still doesn’t change the way I feel. He works 16 hour shifts and this week he was forced on his off days. I think this past week has been the hardest on us, especially the kids.

Yesssssss

But for us i think its the stress of planing the wedding finally getting to him. He shuts down when hes stressed 🤦