How do you and SO... Come to an agreement about something you don't see eye to eye on? Do you talk about it until you…

We compromise!

Or talk it out, pulling research out our butts and we come to an agreement on what is best ultimately. But we both give and take a lot.

we try to compromise, but we are both stubborn...however, i tend to get my way more...lol!

hugs for support!

Moving. I want to move a little further out in the country (we are in the burbs now). We talked about him quitting his job and starting his own business which he isn't 100% set on. I have also suggested me quitting and being a stay at home mom which he is 100% against.

I know it's a big decision but my goal was to move by summer so we can be settled in before DS would need to start 2nd grade, but he keeps saying "I just don't know". We need to make a decision soon or we'll be stuck her for at least another year.

We take our time comming to a decision. We mutually will agree on something or scrap the idea all together untill we find a compromise.

I always cave. Well, usually. My boyfriend could sell ice to a polar bear, I swear. ?

Im pretty sure the meaning of coming to an agreement and someone caving is totally different. I think when you are trying to find an answer to and issue and you make someone cave, you are bein very very selfish. Relationships and marrige are give and take. Not take and take more. I believe in coming to a mutual agreement with DH unless he is truely right and I am wrong or vice versa. Why be a half of a whole if you are not going to give at all?

Seven weeks doesn't sound very long for such big decisions. Take your time and make sure you're both 100% on board with whatever you decide. Good luck :)

There area my more things that weigh into this decision, I don't want to just up and move for no reason.

1. He hates his job, constantly gets belittled by certain people he works with and there is no room for growth.

2. Has always dreamed of starting his own business and I feel like he would be a much happier person and have a higher self-esteem.

3. He works late almost every night and misses dinner and bedtime at least 3x per week.

4. I'm tired of "city life" and everything being about "keeping up with the Jones'". I want trees, land, 4-wheelers, peace and quiet.

I could go on... LOL!

We can't seem to find a middle ground at all.

PP, I know 7 weeks isn't long for such a big decision but to be no where closer to a decision today than we were when we started this discussion is very aggravating. I am a doer, I just make decisions and get stuff done. I can't stand having unresolved "hanging chads" out there. Haha!

It depends on the disagreement. Whoever wants the "safer" option wins. My husband sees no problem giving our boys sips of beer because his dad did it. I am appalled by the idea. So I win and he will never do it.

As far as moving goes, I wouldn't continue to pressure him. He's not sold on the idea of starting his own business and it won't succeed unless he's 100% committed to it. It's a lot of big decisions all at once and there could be resentment if he gives in and then things don't work out. Shouldn't he see if his business is viable first before quitting his job and moving to a bigger, more expensive place?

Oh, sorry, I didn't explain. We would actually move to a cheaper place, my goal is to lower our mortgage payment by $1000 per month or more (if possible). Also, I will have paid off my car soon which will be another $500 per month savings. We will then be able to live off my salary alone and still save about $600 per month. If he makes no money in his business, we will be fine. Whatever he does make will just be extra money for us. We won't be dependent on it at all to pay bills or to save every month.

I haven't really been pressuring him, I just keep bringing it up. It's not like he says "no, absolutely not!" he more or less agrees with the reasons behind it, says he understands but then says he wants to talk about it later or that he isn't sure.

My goal for making a decision sooner is being able to move in the summer before our son starts second grade. The older he gets, the harder I feel it will be for him to make new friends.

My hubby & i either compromise or agree to disagree just because you're married or with someone doesn't mean you have to agree 100 percent of the time.

The only thing about that is that's two huge moves- a new town AND starting his own business sounds insanely overwhelming. Not to mention that if he isn't 100% now, he may not be 100% motivated to start and keep up a business especially when things get tough and you don't want to be in a bad spot

Oh, I see! Sounds like a good plan. It seems like you may need to get to the root of his hesitancy. Something is holding him back. Find a time to ask him when you are both calm and relaxed. Try to just listen instead of talking. Ask questions but don't respond to the answers. Maybe letting him open up will help.

My husband is comparatively slow at coming around to new ideas. I've learned that I have to go at his pace. I say my piece and let him stew on it for as long as he needs, sometimes I want to jump out of my skin because he takes so long (he doesn't, I'm just really impatient). I'm not willing to try to force him into a decision he's not ready for. It's just not worth risking him being resentful in the future. It may make perfect sense to you but if he's not ready, he's not ready.

Thanks ladies! You all are right. I am just trying to do what is best for my family and this is honestly what I think is best. If he isn't on board though, I guess it will have to wait or we will have to stay here forever!! ;-)

Usually talk it out and compromise. Other times argue till he caves =]