Tomorrow is the day
Kinda freaking out. Almost 2 decades ago my husband was bit by a black widow spider in his leg. For the last 20 years basically he's been in constant pain. The venom damaged his lymph system in that leg and his body is unable to regulate the fluid. So it's always swollen and he's always in pain. They've never been able to tell him what was wrong exactly except that he has lymphodema. They would look at his leg, offer him narcotics (which he won't take because pain pill addiction runs in his family) and send him on his way. He recently contacted a new Dr to get it looked at and the Dr called him back freaking out based on his history with the leg. They are doing an MRI on the leg tomorrow, and if the Dr is right....amputation of the leg below the knee is a serious possibility. I'm scared, worried and nervous all wrapped up into a giant ball of anxiety. For years he's jokingly talked about getting it amputated to relieve the pain he deals with everyday. But now it's real. Way too real. ?????
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The MRI went fine, the physician was a general practitioner so he referred us to an orthopedist because in his words "I have absolutely no idea what to tell you". Awesome.
My dad didn't take narcotics for his pain either. He found neurontin (gabapentin generically, I think) was more effective because they target nerve pain. There is also cymbalta now which is an anti depressant that is effective for pain management. To my knowledge, they are no habit forming.
My aunt had a bone die in her foot from a old fracture and was in constant pain. She ended up choosing to get her foot amputated because she just didn't want to live the rest of her life in pain. She says it's the best decision she every made, she no longer has the constant pain to deal with and enjoys taking her prosthetic off as a party trick to gross people out.
Hopefully they find another solution but many people live great lives as amputees.
The narcotics worry him. He refuses to take them now and uses other means of pain relief. Narcotic addiction runs in his family. His dad has a 50 pill a day Vicodin habit and 3 of his cousins have been to rehab multiple times for narcotic addictions. That's why he refuses to take them now. He knows he'd become addicted.
The nerves adjusting is the worst. My nerves would go crazy and my leg would literally jump. Once that stopped it was good. ;) I think the jumping only lasted a month or two, but it does take time for the nerves to calm down. And making sure I kept ahead of the pain meds in the beginning. I had control over my morphine and the nurses got concerned I wasn't using it enough (hello, I was used to pain 24/7, so I was using it as much as I needed). One nurse took away my control over it ands them the machine messed up and SHE got me behind. Haha. I'm sure they got it fixed quick, but it felt like hours. To give you an idea, my amputation was the end of May and I walked down the aisle (with the support of a groomsman's arm) for my sister's wedding in mid-September. And that's with my healing issues from my birth defect. If it's the route he has to take, he'll get through it. :) If you need to, let me know if you have questions!
The recovery sounds brutal GS after reading about it. So major props to you!
Don't stress until the doctors have made their recommendations--they may say it's not necessary! No matter how much time you have to prepare, it's a rough transition. I had a below knee amputation at 19 (I'm 30 now) due to a rare vascular disorder (that also involves lymphodema issues). I was first told to consider amputation when I was in 6th grade. I wish I'd done it sooner! My birth defect is a chronic disorder and amputation was the best decision for me. I am no longer in pain 100% of the time (still have pain, but that's because my disorder goes up my thigh and mildly into my pelvic region). And I don't experience any phantom pain. I do have phantom sensations--in fact, as I read through the talk on this thread about phantom pain, I felt my non-existent toes curl. Sometimes the toe next to my pinky toe will feel achy, but I haven't had that sensation in years, and that was the worst of my phantom sensations. :) If amputation is necessary, it's not the end of the world. In fact, from a person who also has lived with chronic pain, it may be better! He can walk again. It'll be a hard road, but it's possible. Let me know if you have any questions or need to talk!
Eta: I was trying to sound positive in this but after re-reading, not sure how it'll be taken. Just know I'll be praying for you and your hubby that he gets good news tomorrow (hopefully another solution), but I'm here for support if it's news you don't want to hear, because I've been there. Good luck!
I'm sorry. I hope everything goes well. My husband's cousin is a double amputee. He had a motorcycle accident a few years ago. He still experiences phantom pain. His legs were immediately severed when he hit (ironically) a speed limit pole in the accident. He thought his pants had fallen off and was trying to lift them up when it was actually his legs that were severed. For what it's worth he lives an extremely full life. He did go through a period of depression, but he even says himself that he's in a better place now than before his accident.
Please keep us updated. He'll be in my prayers.
Chronic and often debilitating, although there are some treatments, but they will not work for many. It's due to residual representation of that limb in the brain. Reason for loss isn't a factor. It's a brain thing. The latest study on the issue was in 2013.
80% of amputees experience phantom pain. So the lifelong pain will likely still exist even with amputation unfortunately.
I would be so worried about phantom limb pain. 15 years ago doctors wanted to amputate my mom's foot and she declined for the simple fact that she would continue to have pain regardless if her foot was attached or not.
I will say a prayer for you and your husband. Hopefully they won't have to amputate!
Yesterday I went out with my boyfriend went to watch a movie, me and him don't live together yet. but point is yesterday when he was dropping me off his like sleep over at my house witch the mom and dad lives. I said no,
his response was why is everyone deciding or making choices for you and their going to do the same with the baby, when I know that's not true. what he thinks is that my mom tells me not to sleep over. So he left all mad. and I felt in my heart that he went on and cheated on me...
My husband and I aren’t exactly strangers when it comes to relationship challenges 💞. We have been together for 14 years and married for eight, so we’ve definitely gone through some growing pains as we navigated a long-distance relationship in college and our first year living together as a married 👫 couple.
But nothing has challenged our relationship quite like our first year as 👪 parents .
Before you have your first child, you have these grand ideas of what it will be like. There’s more slee...
@itsamemario, you deleted your post before I could hit send but this is my comment: I don’t know if this answers your question but this is my answer.
My son is 7 and he knows race and color. Why? Because he himself comes from a family that is multi racial and because he has already experienced racism. I also believe as his mother it’s my job to teach him color and the cold hard truth about society. He knows what’s going on in this world. I’d be hurting him if I allowed him to blindly walk out...
“You look too young to be a mom!”
Or how about …
“You have a BABY? No! You look like a baby yourself!”👶
Oh wait, here’s a good one …
“Are you the nanny, ooor … ?”
“No, yeah I’m his mom,” I’d reply. “Yes, I am young,” I’d agree.
Considering I got pregnant straight out of college, I was certainly on the younger end of the parenting spectrum. (No one was more surprised than me, I assure you.) And yet, I wasn’t exactly a teen mom. I wasn’t juggling school courses and motherhood, like so many s...
Rant
My SO has been rude a lot ever since I've gotten pregnant...he said he doesn't care about my pregnancy, he doesn't even take one day off from work just ONE to come to at least one ultra sound appointment. I mean he's always making sure I'm fed, he lets use the heating pad, and even apologized to saying he doesn't care. He can mess with me all day but when I want to join and play around he gives me an attitude. He just makes me feel like s*** at times. He's a great fiancé don't get me wro...
Prayers that he gets some relief from his pain without losing his leg.My dh's right leg is amputated above the knee.