Honestly right now I do not want my ex in the room when I have my son but he is begging my mom and she said that I should allow him because he’s still the father and deserves to be there for his son. But I don’t know I need to decide soon before he’s born.
Hounestly it's your choice . What ever your most comfortable with .
I assume u two aren’t together right? Will he be supportive or stress u out? It’s 100000% up to u and not your mom. Don’t let her talk u into something that will make u uncomfortable!! It’s a very vulnerable position to be in, giving birth, and u wanna make sure you’re as comfortable as possible with good people around u! Good luck love that’s a tough one
I don’t know if he’s going to be supportive I haven’t really talked to him but I think I should before making any decisions
absolutely it’s yours and only your decision to make. Whatever you’re most comfortable with is what u need to do!
My ex husband were in the middle of a drama filled divorce when I was giving birth. I ended up letting him in the room and regret it to this day. It was such negative energy. It's ultimately up to you.
That’s how I feel that it will be negative energy and I don’t want that energy around me. I was thinking that if I don’t I will just let him visit the next day.
he can even go see her in the nursery once she gets there. Just explain the situation to the nurses
It’s your decision. You need to feel comfortable and at ease when you are ready to give birth. While I can see what your mom is saying, if I was doubting it I wouldn’t. It could cause stress and upset which would not be good for the baby or you.
I also think he has the right to be in the room cus hes the father and at least he wants to be there not like other guys that dont care but you taken him back after what happen that's a hard decision
Just because men say that we all know that’s bs mine said that shit too and they didn’t want shit to do with there kids and still don’t 💯
Yeah my mom said the same that not a lot of guys care to be there but I guess we’ll see. I think I need to talk to him and see where his intentions are at he says he’s gonna be there but I don’t know that could change men say things all the time they don’t mean.
It’s definitely your decision as to who you want in the room. There’s no right or wrong to it. You do what is in your best interest and what is less stressful for you. You want a positive environment without stress during your time.
Right cause now he is asking if his mom can come and after the car seat situation I’m just not wanting her no where near the baby or me. Not even sure why he is asking for her I thought it was about him. That makes me not want to consider it he can just come the next day like a normal visitor
your having a baby come out of you “you make the decision not your mother,not anyone but,you! On who you want in the room of the amazing moment of giving birth you want a calm environment not chaos and it’s all about you and the baby not anyone else.
Thank you I really needed this reassurance because I honestly feel like people want me to just let him be there for the sake of his fatherhood but not thinking about me
It’s good to take your moms opinion into consideration but I think you should do what’s best for you. When my daughter’s dad did the same thing to me a few weeks before I gave birth I decided to let him still be present. He wasn’t allowed to cut the cord, hold my hand or anything I just made sure he knew he was required to stand back the whole time, sign the birth certificate, take pictures and hold her. After that he was allowed to come back the next day for a few hours with family and after the 6 weeks we established a visiting schedule.
I personally would not let him. It’s gonna be negative energy and it’s gonna be uncomfortable for you. He should have thought about that before cheating 🤷🏾♀️ that’s how I see it. He can see the baby when he is born. That’s just me though at the end of the day the staff is gonna let you make the decision your the patient! It’s up to you.
Right cause honestly I feel like it’s almost like a privilege to be there and I feel like he lost that. I don’t know tbh my mom says for “support” but I don’t even really want his support. If I do it it’s gonna be for him just so he sees his son come into the world and not so much for me if that makes sense. But again he has lost that privilege
I agree!he can see him the next day and sign the birth certificate and spend some time and leave.
It's your decision. I will say I was in your position when I had my oldest. I made it clear he was not allowed into the labor and delivery room. He tried getting buzzed in but they wouldn't allow it. Later after I had my son, when I felt like it was the right time I left him come in.
I am thinking the next day will be better and he can still sign the birth certificate the next day right? and now he is asking if his mom can come and I want her no where near the baby after she pulled that stunt with the car seat
Yes, just make the nurses aware of what you want. If you don't want him there the day you give birth, let them know so they don't let him in. If you don't want his mom there at all, give them her name and tell them that. Give yourself time to rest and bond with your baby.
He literally can’t do nothing for you so if it stresses you out tell the hospital to make him leave because it’s supposed to be a happy time not focused on him and that’s really what he wants if he wants to see his kid tell him get in line at the child support office I bet he will disappear like they all do 💯🤷🏼♀️
Right and now he is asking if his mom can be there like I thought it was for you to be there for your son? I don’t know why he would even ask for his mom after the incident with the car seat. He can honestly come see he next day like a normal visitor
ugh 😩 well don’t ruin that day it’s your baby’s bday just enjoy being a new mommy
It’s 100% up to you and no one else. You’re the one going to be giving birth not him, not anyone else. And if you don’t want him there he can always come as a visitor after the baby is born.
Negative. He deserves to be at the hospital and the first to meet his child but he damn sure doesn’t DESERVE to be in the room. That’s a privilege not a right in my eyes. It’s about me at that moment and my comfort to deliver this baby as quickly, easily, & stress free as I can so I’m not having anyone in that room whose gonna effect that. Father of the child or not.
Right which is why I told my mom to tell him that he can come visit right after or be the first to hold his son if he wants
good for you!! Don’t let anyone bully you into some shit you don’t wanna do. If he wanted shit to work that way then he should of done more to make you comfortable and feel he supports you. But since he didn’t then this is what he gotta deal with. Sucks to suck is what I’d tell em 🤷🏽♀️😂
I say the next day or maybe a couple hours after so your not feeling uncomfortable during labor!
Considering the circumstances, I wouldn't let him. You need a stress free environment. He can sit in the waiting room or come the next day.
I'm usually all for dad being there if he absolutely wants to....but your situation is different. It is 100% your choice.
But good grief.....don't let his mom be in that room with you. You already stress about her enough now. Imagine the power she will think she has while your that vulnerable.
Right I don’t even know why she wants to after the stroller carseat situation. For her to take back a gift doesn’t show she cares for her grandson so I definitely don’t want her no where around
the carseat thing was petty but not ban from seeing the baby ever worthy. But no, she doesn't have any right being in the hospital with you while you're pushing a whole human out.
You want to have a stress free environment when having your baby, if you don’t want him there don’t have him there. Most definitely don’t have his mom there if she’s stressing you out. You can always let the hospital know what you want and don’t want around your baby.
Your decision, but I would go with your first instinct and not allow him in during delivery—- however once Baby is born I think he should be the first visitor. Anyone pressuring you I would kindly ask them to stop and if they don’t then reconsider them being there as well. You don’t want to be about to push and end up caving in because someone won’t shut their mouth about him being let in.
You can always talk to the nurses and Try to have him in the room. But let them know the terms y'all are on, And if you want him to leave tell them and they will escort him out.
Ss3mom·
I assume u two aren’t together right? Will he be supportive or stress u out? It’s 100000% up to u and not your mom. Don’t let her talk u into something that will make u uncomfortable!! It’s a very vulnerable position to be in, giving birth, and u wanna make sure you’re as comfortable as possible with good people around u! Good luck love that’s a tough one
Ajaecymone··
I don’t know if he’s going to be supportive I haven’t really talked to him but I think I should before making any decisions
Ss3mom··
absolutely it’s yours and only your decision to make. Whatever you’re most comfortable with is what u need to do!
scream.queen·
It's your decision. I will say I was in your position when I had my oldest. I made it clear he was not allowed into the labor and delivery room. He tried getting buzzed in but they wouldn't allow it. Later after I had my son, when I felt like it was the right time I left him come in.
Ajaecymone··
I am thinking the next day will be better and he can still sign the birth certificate the next day right? and now he is asking if his mom can come and I want her no where near the baby after she pulled that stunt with the car seat
scream.queen··
Yes, just make the nurses aware of what you want. If you don't want him there the day you give birth, let them know so they don't let him in. If you don't want his mom there at all, give them her name and tell them that. Give yourself time to rest and bond with your baby.