How to Handle Aggressive Behavior in Toddlers?
Hey y’all. So my daughter is 18 months old (adjusted at a little over 16 months). I’m a full time nanny and I bring my daughter with me. the girl i watch is also 16 months. The situation is great and my daughter has learned a lot from her already. But the girl is really not nice to her. She’s not nice to her brother either. All day long she’s taking things away from my daughter, she hits her, pulls her clothing until she falls on the ground, she grabs her skin and her hair and pulls her. She threw toys at her head last week and gave her a bruise. I’ve told the parents and they’ve seen it happen to. But nothing has changed. She doesn’t listen and when she gets yelled at it makes her want to do it more. They want me to put her on the couch and make her stay there when she’s in trouble. I suggested the crib but they want that to be her safe place so I respect that and don’t put her in there for time out. but she doesn’t stay on the couch. I’ll yell at her, put her there and tell her to stay and she will immediately get back up and come back over and hit again. I don’t know what to do because the job is really great that they’re the same age but I can honestly see my daughter getting really hurt one day. I understand a lot of it has to do with the age, but my daughter isn’t doing any of this to any other child
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What she is doing is normal for her age. Being yelled at is a big no. You don’t yell at a child her age. You show her by example how to act. You give her time outs if needed. She isn’t just going to start listening because you yell at her. Behavior takes time to change. Praise her for good behavior. Be consistent on what’s expected and on time outs.
@jtaylorg, and clearly it doesn’t work. So try a different approach.
At this age this is how to do it. You don’t yell. You sit the child down. Keep it simple, “hands are for hugging” “toys are for playing” “you hit you sit” you say it once and sit her down. When she get up you sit her back and repeat yourself, the first time. Beyond that, you just get up silently sit her back down. It’ll be a game at first. But with consistency, she will understand. Consistency is key. You keep doing it. It’ll be exhausting at first, then it will become second nature for 16 months I would round up to 1.5 minutes. If you can get a little timer as the time out timer. 1.5 minutes. When she gets up start again. Once she sits for that time and the timer goes off, she can get up.
Does she have a play pen a high chair or a small stroller?
I remember my son doing that at that age but that’s because my sil playfully will tell him to hit someone. It did bother me because that’s not the kind of behavior to be teaching toddlers even if it’s just playing around just for laughs . Maybe she got that from some one or maybe her parents spank her too much ?
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I agree she doesn’t understand yet I would sit her down and stay there with her and every time she gets up sit her back down and say no sit down for hitting that’s not okay or whatever you say