Looking for advice.
Back story - my bf and I have been together for 3.5 years. we have a 17 month old together, and just bought a house together. His mom is not a nice person and never has been. she has no relationship with anyone in her family including her 3 kids.

Ok so, his mom had always been rude. and when I say rude, I mean she never once said hi to me when I came in her house. When my bf calls her with a question she answers the phone saying “what?”. She called me out on facebook because my daughter wasn’t wearing a jacket in a photo when it was 57 degrees outside that day and she had a sweatshirt on that was lined with fur on the inside. She told me i was being stupid and I needed to use common sense. She saw my daughter one time in her 41 day nicu stay. she never asked me how i was when I was pregnant. she never asked how i was after my emergency csection 7 weeks early that ended in a long nicu stay. She has seen my daughter probably 5 times in her 17 months of life and hasn’t seen her since christmas, 7 months ago🙄 She never asks to see her. She never asks how she’s doing or how we are doing. She doesn’t reach out to me. My bf told her she needed to apologize to me for bashing me on facebook and she never did.
Fast forward to 2 weeks ago, I told him I want to know why she doesn’t see her granddaughter. So he asked her.

She said she shouldn’t have to ask to see her granddaughter. I disagree and lemme tell you why. I don’t like being around her. She’s not nice, she makes me feel uncomfortable and she never made a single attempt at having a relationship with me. I’ve been NOTHING but nice to someone who deserves nothing in life. So if you’re going to treat me like that, then no I will not ask you if you want to see her. You should 100% ask me, if you really wanted to see her. Which I don’t think she does.

She also said that she wasn’t in the wrong for bashing me on facebook because my daughter wasn’t wearing a jacket. The way i feel is, if you’re concerned..text me or call me and i’ll clear it up for you. NEVER call a mom out on facebook for something. I do everything for my child. My bf is never home & that’s not to take away from the father that he is because he loves his daughter, but he works SO much. I feed her every meal, change every diaper, I work 40 hours a week WITH my daughter and take her to every appointment alone. Do NOT call me out on my parenting and especially online. Apparently she has an issue with me because of something she did.

He told her that our daughter has no idea who she is and if that’s what she wants then it’s her loss and that he was going to marry me if she likes it or not. Her response to that...and y’all lmk if this is rude..was “if you chose to marry her that’s your choice”
that’s rude to say right?

I’ve given everyone an equal chance to be apart of our daughters life. some stepped up, and others didn’t. I hate her. and I don’t want her in my daughters life. If she wants to see her, then that’s fine but I want to sit down and talk about this first. without my daughter present. and if she’s not down for that then I don’t care. She won’t get to see her. but I will not be respected by someone who i’ve always had respect for even when they don’t deserve it.

Please give me yalls advice