So my husband walked out on me in January. He finally came and got the rest of his stuff like I've been begging him to. He had begged to come home and I held my ground and said no. Honestly I'll never forgive him for cheating or anything but why does it hurt so bad like he walked out on me all over again?
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@whoswhoo He admitted the grass isn't greener. He sees everything. I have ever done for him. Even when we first seperated i paid child support and kept him out of jail because he promised to see our daughter. And has he no. We were working on more family time and trying to do stuff. For a while when she was younger like 1 month he had to feed her bottles because the car accident stopped my milk production and she wanted my breast milk still and wouldn't eat a bottle for me plus it hurt so much to feed her a bottle when I was so determiend to breast feed. Other then that he hasn't done much. I keep making excuses but the fights are over that. We split up because I was tired of having her 24/7 iy was so bad I couldn't piss without her because he would let her scream bloody fucking murder to play a game. Whats worse is I fell for the games. So who's reslly the dumb one here? Probably me lol.
@kittykatsmeow, well the fact that he wasn’t taking care of his business with the other kids makes me think he’s never gonna change.
@whoswhoo He never will. I know that now. And it's a harsh reality but I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt that he loves his kids enough to do it for all of them. They deserve a dad not an asshole.
To get past this, you both need to have an honest conversation about what happened and why. There is always a root to every problem. Once you two get through that, you will have a more solid foundation to start building a better relationship to co-parent. Counseling sounds like it might be best if you two can never agree on when to really discuss your issues. It will also help having someone neutral.
I've asked for counseling I've begged for it. I've done so much and now that I finally let go. He doesn't want to. He liked watching me suffer and beg and plead and now he's doing it and I honestly know why. It was finances and a car accident. We never had a honeymoon phase like we should have. I'm a lot to blame. I was mean and nasty because I was afraid of how we we're making it to the next week financially. And now I see where I went wrong but I don't want to be pulled back in. I feel like there's nothing left. I'll co-parent but he's been messaging about wanting to sign her over to me so honestly if he does I would be okay with that too. I love her but I don't want her to question where daddy is for months on end. Or why doesn't daddy call me. I just wanna protect her. And i guess myself as well from him
@kittykatsmeow, well my first sons dad sounds a lot like him. Complete POS and I was great to him. I really loved him and it took a long time to get past my feelings for him. I’m sorry you’re having to endure his manipulative behavior. My sons dad is a deadbeat but pays child support. He threatened to sign over rights which I told him I was ok with. He doesn’t know, but he can’t unless someone is willing to adopt the child. It’s been 7 years and we haven’t seen him.
@whoswhoo did you file for full custody? Or did you never file custody? Sorry I was cleaning my house with my emotions.
I don’t know the story, but what was his reasoning for cheating? Have y’all thoroughly discussed it? @kittykatsmeow,
He never gave a reason for cheating. Everytime either of us want to talk the other doesn't. He's begging to meet me in public and I said yes so he can see our daughter who he has chosen not to see since being with an 18 year old girl. Which idc about having a new girlfriend I hate the fact that he is fucking with the girls heart and my heart and obviously my daughters. She deserves a dad not some POS sperm donor.
Because coming to get his stuff made it official. I'm so sorry u r going through this
I'm not sorry I am because it makes me all the more stronger for my daughter. I needed it to be over but for me its so much more. I feel free as a bird and yet weighed down like a bear because I never thought my marriage was going to end.
No, he’s just a deadbeat. My son mentioned wanting to meet him around the age of 4 but bio dad refused. My SO has raised my son since he was 1. The guy put me through sooo much. Cheated whenever he could. I’m so glad I’m not with him anymore and honestly I feel as if it is best he doesn’t have a role in my sons life. He pays over 700 a month of child support. My SO thinks one day he will come around. I was hoping you and your SO could come to terms on why he cheated and really work through it. But if he’s immature and unwilling to work towards closure then it’s not worth wasting your time.