I honestly think I don't enjoy pregnancy very much, simply because in my head I link it to being a…

I honestly think I don't enjoy pregnancy very much, simply because in my head I link it to being a very lonely time. Extremely lonely. I always had pictured something else in my head, and I see women who have a loving boyfriend or husband, super involved... And I have never had that. My first pregnancy I did completely alone. And now it is basically the same. I feel like it's even worse actually because I am the only one working/providing, and I feel taken away from my first born too because I am so busy. I wish I didn't feel this way but I truly don't ever want to have another child because I don't like being pregnant and it is a very lonely time for me. I relate it to EXTREME LONELINESS. I don't know if I will ever feel different about it. This is ROUND TWO pregnant all alone, round three if you count my first pregnancy which ended in miscarriage, and still nothing was different then. I count it and that adds to it. Not only am I emotionally and physically drained.... but I constantly feel so alone. I love my children but I believe these will be my only two.