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Ashley Row
Ashley Row
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Breastfeeding So my SO and I got into an argument last night bc I let him know I plan on breastfeeding whether it be…

Breastfeeding

So my SO and I got into an argument last night bc I let him know I plan on breastfeeding whether it be while we're out or at home. He said he's not comfortable with me breastfeeding in public, especially without a cover. I let him know it's not about what he's comfortable with. If it's hot out or the baby is just uncomfortable under a cover then I won't be using one. I feel like he's being so immature about it. He mentioned I don't want other people seeing your breast or guys will take pictures. At that point I got so frustrated I couldn't continue the conversation. He says if I do it I won't be doing it around his family. I'm beyond frustrated

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deleted-user

deleted-user

Wow that's dumb it is literally their only purpose! Does he go out without a shirt? Sounds like he is a bit sexist.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

You could compromise and just be sure to pump often an bring bottles with you. He is bein kinda childish though. My fiancé doesn't want me breastfeeding in public for the same reasons but I honestly see no problem with breastfeeding in public. But we came to an agreement that if the baby is crying I am not going to make her wait till we get home or go to a damn bathroom. But that I will try to pump often and bring breast milk in bottles.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I pump a bottle before I go out. Gives others a chance to feed the baby too. I did wait until she was 5 weeks old to introduce a bottle and had her dad feed her. I wanted her to know that I BF, dad bottle feeds. I think you should respect your man, make a decision mutually. Come to an agreement you both feel comfortable with.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

Wow, that's odd. Your decision 100%!

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I breastfeed. I have not done it out in public because I don't fully feel comfortable or confident. But I do breastfeed when we bring our daughter over to his parents house. If his dad is home, I go upstairs into the spare bedroom. If it's only his mom I feed her on the couch. It's amazing how many people happen to visit while you are feeding or how the baby gets hungry when people are there. I do supplement with bottles of formula or pumped breast milk as well. She is 6 weeks old and had a difficult time with latching.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

Personally, I'm not sure I could breastfeed in public but that's because I am really shy and it would make me nervous. My boyfriend would never feel uncomfortable though, if it's what is best for the baby then we will both do our part! He wouldn't think twice about the fact id have a breast out, he'd see it as feeding our baby. I think you do what you know feels right and maybe once baby is here your partner will feel differently. I know for men it can be hard to grasp the reality of having a baby before they arrive. You do what if in the best interest of baby and yourself, if baby is hungry I'm sure you'll instinctively know what to do :).

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I will agree that covers are nice, but if that's what YOU want to do for yourself. I'm not changing what I wanna do just because someone else is uncomfortable with it. Also, it's nice using a cover with a newborn because they don't normally care. Once they get a few months old, they're trying to rip them off. No one wants to eat with a bag over their head ?

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I think it's just as much as what he is comfortable with than it is what you are comfortable with! It's just as much the mans baby as it is ours! Like the other ladies said, there are ways to be modest without a cover. Besides that, there are lightweight cotton covers that I'm sure would work even in warmer weather.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

You do what you need to do. He needs to grow the hell up. My 9 year old stepson tried telling me that I shouldn't breastfeed in public, but I explained to him that his sibling needs to eat when he's hungry, no matter where we are. I also explained that nursing is what breasts are for, so there is no shame in feeding your child wherever you may be, with or without a cover. If my 9 year old understands now, a grown man sure as hell should.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

Girl Ashely, I feel like if I was the one who wrote this post. I'm on the same exact train with you. My SO and I literally discuss taht all the time. Im personally not thinking about it so much at the moment but when times comes I won't really care. Men should be the one back you up and if someone dares to tell you something in public he should be the one standing up to them and now allowing us feel uncomfortable for doing what we were meant to do.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

You don't have to use a cover! You can try the two shirt method. I did it!

I wore a tank top underneath whatever shirt I wore, and I'd reach under my shirt to pull down the tank top, and pull up my other shirt while holding my son close to latch right away, and that shirt would lay overtop of my breast. No boob showed!

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I'm all for breast feeding. I'm planning to breast feed because it's healthier for me and baby, but I personally am going to be modest about it. I'm going to use a cover up or pump in advance so my SO has bonding time when feeding the baby. I get that it's like this new empowering thing to pop your tit out and feed the baby wherever because it needs to eat, but being modest about it isn't so bad either. And plus I probably wouldn't be taking my baby out in scorching heat anyway because the baby and most likely I will get fussy because of a the heat alone. Again, this is my personal opinion.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

This cracked my and my boyfriend up ? I'm a CLC, and my boyfriend is a tattooed biker kind of guy, so I was kind of nervous he would flip out if I breastfed in public for the same reason- "no one else can see your boobs!" Come to find out after having a conversation about it, he's 100% supportive and said "you're feeding our child. The first person to say something will get my fist down their throat" Haha. Needless to say, I couldn't be more thankful that he's more than supportive.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I understand his concerns. I personally don't breast feed but I pump. I personally didn't want to have to whip out a breast with friends, family and strangers. I wouldn't be too mad at him

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deleted-user

deleted-user

He better get the f*** over it REAL quick!

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deleted-user

deleted-user

My SO said do what ever baby wants or needs he isnt worried about me being stared at he understands ita completely NATURAL and the best for baby . Sorry your case is the other way around maybe he will change his mind when he sees he isnt spending money like he would on formula.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

After he can get his mind past the "that's mine" and no other guys can look and think "that's my baby's food" he will be more comfortable. Do what you feel is natural and best for your baby and you!

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deleted-user

deleted-user

My hubby and I laughed after reading your post! We both thought him saying guys would look and take pics was very comical. He will get over it. There is NOTHING sexual about breastfeeding. And I've publicly breastfeed three so far, with and without coverings. People are so ridiculous now. Get over your own over sexualized thinking before you say a word to a breastfeeding mother. So immature!

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deleted-user

deleted-user

Give him some literature on breastfeeding. Have your doctor or lactation specialist speak to him about it. He needs to be more supportive and less of a pain

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I nursed in public for 2 yrs...no one ever took my picture. Even though I wish I had more nursing pictures. I used the 2 shirt method. Tank top under a regular shirt. It provides privacy.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

Huh. Sounds a bit selfish. I guarantee most people don't care and the ones that do are rare and rarely say something. Take pictures? Lol he's taking it way too seriously. You are feeding your child.

Honestly just do it and it'll show him there's nothing to freak over. In the meantime, be prepared for his protests and anger.

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I'm all for breast feeding but me personally k just am not comfortable enough to not wear a cover (to each their own though!) and my husband was glad we didn't have to have that discussion. I think it's just a relatively Normal guy thing to not want any one else to see your breasts no matter the circumstance even though they don't get that it isn't sexual. It's definitely different for each couple though! He'll most likely change his mind when it's scorching hot and babys screaming for some milk!

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deleted-user

deleted-user

I can understand his discomfort... Might be wise to buy and have a cover available for his satisfaction and then make the decision to use or not when the time comes. Not worth fighting over it now... Good luck!

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deleted-user

deleted-user

Well unless he wants to breastfeed he can close his face gap.

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