cpullin489
Cristina
Advice! So stressed :(
I need other pregnant women's point of view... My husband works in the oilfields and as some of you all know, they are in a bad situation. People are losing their jobs left and right. Already my brother lost his job because of this and he can't find work. Already put his house for sale and he has 3 small children and his wife and it's extremely sad for them. Then my brother in law lost his job and now my ex (sons father) lost his job yesterday. My FIL said he's next to lose his job. I'm so scared my husband is going to lose his job! I told my husband not to take paternity leave. He wanted to be off 3 vacation days plus his original 3 days off PLUS a week (6days in his case) for paternity leave then his normal 3 days off, totaling 12 days off. I told him just to take the 3 days off plus his original 3 days off which totals 6 days off. I'm having a c section so he's worried I need more help. Which I know I do since I have a two year old also. I can't let him know it's going to be hard but I'd rather him be working and making money then getting time off and getting a super tiny check. I'd rather him be making more money and putting it aside in case he loses his job. I'm just a mess with all this. Would you tell your husband not to take a paternity leave if his job was on the line? Or would you want him there?
I need other pregnant women's point of view... My husband works in the oilfields and as some of you all know, they are in a bad situation. People are losing their jobs left and right. Already my brother lost his job because of this and he can't find work. Already put his house for sale and he has 3 small children and his wife and it's extremely sad for them. Then my brother in law lost his job and now my ex (sons father) lost his job yesterday. My FIL said he's next to lose his job. I'm so scared my husband is going to lose his job! I told my husband not to take paternity leave. He wanted to be off 3 vacation days plus his original 3 days off PLUS a week (6days in his case) for paternity leave then his normal 3 days off, totaling 12 days off. I told him just to take the 3 days off plus his original 3 days off which totals 6 days off. I'm having a c section so he's worried I need more help. Which I know I do since I have a two year old also. I can't let him know it's going to be hard but I'd rather him be working and making money then getting time off and getting a super tiny check. I'd rather him be making more money and putting it aside in case he loses his job. I'm just a mess with all this. Would you tell your husband not to take a paternity leave if his job was on the line? Or would you want him there?
9.1 лет
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The lucky bastard had 12 weeks off with full pay when we had our daughter. I had 8 weeks off with 50% pay, took one unpaid week then went back to work. I really could of used 3 more weeks of healing after my c-section before going back but we needed the money. He just has a ridiculous amount of sick and vacation time because they get mad if he takes time off even if he's sick and puking his guts out.
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The lucky bastard had 12 weeks off with full pay when we had our daughter. I had 8 weeks off with 50% pay, took one unpaid week then went back to work. I really could of used 3 more weeks of healing after my c-section before going back but we needed the money. He just has a ridiculous amount of sick and vacation time because they get mad if he takes time off even if he's sick and puking his guts out.
I'm hoping someone comes to my rescue and volunteers to help lol it's just an overwhelming feeling and I feel guilty for feeling so negative. I should be so happy having a new baby but I'm more stressed out than anything. You're so lucky your husband gets 6 weeks off! That's amazing :)
I guess my only thing would be since you have a toddler now you can't pick up your toddler because they would weigh too much and you risk popping stitches if you do, or straining your already very sore muscles. It's a tough situation to be in. My husband is taking 6 weeks off and because he has the vacation time and sick time he will get full pay and his job is protected under fmla. Do you have other family or friends that could take turns coming over to help you out?
Ya my dad is not very understanding. I'm just hoping I can do this. I was a single mom with my first and I had a c section and it was hard but I did it. Having a toddler now tho is what worries me. I just feel so alone in all this. I can't dare tell my husband how I'm feeling because then he'll stress out and feel like he has to stay home and not work but we NEED him to be at work.
Can your mom come stay with you then? I'm sorry but your physical health is more important than your dad's feelings, and it would only be for 5-6 weeks unless there are complications. It's not like it's permanent.
Well my mom wants to help me. My dad tho is giving her a really hard time about it tho. The plan was for me to stay at my parents while my husband worked but my dad is being a jerk about it because he doesn't want all the noise at his house. I don't want to cause problems for my parents so I'm acting like I can handle everything.
How stressful! So sorry. Could you use part of the extra money to hire some help? Saving half of it is better than saving none. I've never had a csection so I don't know how much help you would need but my friend couldn't pick up her baby for two weeks and had difficulties moving around the house.
I can't imagine not having my husband home to help after my c-section. Do you have any family near by that can come help you? I wasn't allowed to drive for 2 weeks and no lifting more than 10lb for 5 weeks total.
I would have him stay at work instead of paternity leave. I'm in a similar situation except my hubby just started a new job and it is our only income so Im worried if he tries to take time off his employers will see him as disposable. A roof over our head and some money saved is the greatest thing he can do for our family right now.
However, if you are still not healed enough in the 6 days and have no one to help with the toddler you may have to ask him to take the paternity leave. Having your health suffer and possibly really hurting yourself by trying to do to much when your body isn't ready could cause you to be on complete bedrest and someone would have to take care of you longer than the original recovery time.
Your physical health should always be #1