rant
Okay, so long story cut short. Shortly after I became pregnant (21 weeks now) the baby's father started to become violent and stolen a large quantity of money from me so i walked away from him. His parents fully supported him through this (it's their child I understand they would) but not a single member of his family have contacted me to find out how the scans went, or even how I'm feeling about this, or how the baby is, nothing, nada. I haven't denied any contact once baba is born but regarding the father I've stated that it has to be supervised until I'm sure that he can be trusted alone. Am I wrong to be feeling put out for the baby, and myself for their lack of communication? They know I have medical condition that can severely effect the pregnancy, baby's father also has the same condition, they know the risks) It's like they've just wiped their right hands of me and the baby when we are both innocent parties in this. I may be insensitive but to me if you can't ask about the pregnancy or how it's going why would they be interested in the baby once it's here? It's their grandchild at the end of the day.
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I left the baby's father because I had no choice. Neither me or my unborn baby were safe living with him. As I'm from the UK the father doesn't automatically get rights as we aren't married and if he isn't on the birth certificate. I'll give them the chance once the baby is born to initiate any contact, I have no issues with his mum or sister so wouldn't stop them having contact. My affairs are in order as far as I can whilst I'm pregnant and baby isn't here, and we're both safe which is what was important.
I don't think an ex's family has an obligation to contact you, no. However, since you've left him you should get your affairs in order and be prepared to file for custody immediately following birth. You don't want to be unprepared for if or when his family decides that all of a sudden this baby is "family" and want visitation.
If they're peaceable, and you feel like after a probationary period of supervised visits, that they can see your LO, than you can amend agreements you've made at that point.
But from the sound of it, you really need to make it all official.
No one in my family just calls to ask about my pregnancy, sure they'll ask if they see me but they don't go out of their way. And that's my own family who I love very much and cares for both me and my child. For most people, it doesn't become real/they don't think it's necessary to check in until the baby is born. I wouldn't make any judgements on them until a few months after the baby is born. If they try to have a relationship then that's great, but if not then I'd distance them from you and your child
Dunno what changed, but his sister messaged me yesterday after posting this to find out how I was and how the baby was.
Thanks ladies, I just needed to rant.
I know I'm doing right and what's safest for the baby, that's all I'm concerned about.