So my husband and I have agreed that we don't want family or friends to watch our baby since we met we both agreed on…

Not even gonna comment about the gay family part...

But in regards to the decision you made to not let family and friends watch the baby but being worried you will need help... In my opinion then you will either need to be frank with your husband that even though you are a stay at home mom you will need him to step up and watch the baby sometimes, or buy professional help i.e. occasional daycare or

Op not wanting people in the babys life because of sexual abuse history or other factors such as violence, drugs, unsafe environment ect. Is completely understandable. I'm not sure what advice to give you. If you friends n family are not good people (for examples listed above) and you believe they would cause your baby harm then don't let them around your child. If they are good people and just don't share the same religious views as your husband then bring them around. You have just as much say as what goes on with your child as he does. Good luck! God bless!

@amysbabies I did not know this before I married him. Not sure if he believes in that wife's submission.

I’ll start this with I am a Christian. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions/beliefs and I get that, but if he’s going to choose who is in his child’s life based on whether or not they are following the standards of the Bible there would be no one around that child unless he is picking and choosing what he thinks is acceptable. If that’s the case, it is completely unfair to the family and friends being affected by him being so hypocritical. My best friend is a lesbian and from seeing her and her girlfriend with their niece I can tell you they will be the greatest aunts and honestly, a better influence on my child than a majority of our other friends and family will be. They have been here with me through my pregnancy more than my family, just because they care so much and want to be involved in his life. Your sexual preference should not define you as a person or cause for you to be treated any differently. It absolutely breaks my heart to think about your family missing out on this baby in their life and also this baby having a few less people to love on them and care for them. If you disagree with your husbands opinion you need to stand up to him. You can do this on a respectful way I’m sure, I’m not saying cause a blow out. But this is a big deal and y’all definitely need to communicate together on this. There will be a lot of hurt feelings.

That is just silly! The Bible is also against tattoos, other religions, sinners in general. Are they going to be kept in a bubble and not allowed around anyone? Not able to attend public school? I went to a religious school growing up and there were gay students, though they kept it secret. Gay people are a lot less dangerous than some straight people. I would put my foot down, being gay is not contagious, they are just regular people. If you married him knowing this, you are kind of in a bind, but if you did not know he felt this way, you have leverage to have it your way or compromise. Does he also believe in a wife’s submission to her husband? If so you might have a harder time.

Our family and friends don’t watch our child either. We hired a sitter (nanny basically) that we trust, with the experience we wanted. What’s nice is that they will follow your lead where as family and friends will basically do what they want (usually).

Didn’t really read other comments but I personally say I get where he’s coming from but at the same time, family is family and if they’ve never done anything wrong to you why shut them out?

Judge not that ye be not judge, that is a verse in the bible. No sin is greater than another, I hate when people pick and choose which part of the bible to live by and then discard the rest as though it doesn't apply to them; that is hypocrisy

@brooklynrn I'm so heartbroken about this! It hurts my heart especially because my mom figure is married to her wife and my best friend also my cousin is gay. I love them both dearly. I'd rather choose them be in our childs life rather than just agree with him. I've cried over this several times!

@newlyironman because I don't trust many people including my family. I've been hurt sexually by my oldest brother and other family members and trusting people after that is insanely hard. I also am concerned about what they do or what they might teach our child when we are not around. I would be okay with it when the child is older. So it could talk to me if something where to happen. Also some close family dose not have a safe enough environment for our child to be in there home.

As a lesbian this just breaks my heart. If any of my family didn’t want me to be around their children bc I have a wife I would be heartbroken. If your husband doesn’t agree with being gay then all he needs to do is not sleep with men.

@raisinghazel yes I completely agree!

i hope he follows all gods rules and not just the one's that fit his own agenda

Why don't you want anyone watching the kid?

Hmmmm Im trying to respond in a

nice way to this ... but, i can't while still being honest.... so, I'll just answer the question you asked..

"how do I also make it so my family can be around our baby?"

-that baby is just as much yours as his and at the end of the day remember you have a voice too... I would say if ypu really want your family which is also that baby's family around that child then stand firm and say so !!!

I'd lose my mind if my other half did this to me 😠

I've tried to type of 3 different responses and I just can't. Your husband needs to get head out of his ass. Its 2018 for fucks sake. And don't not bring the bible into this because no real God fearing Christian would be so hateful. I'm going to pray for his ugly heart!

@angelbrownell26, I would just tell him that you understand his wishes and beliefs but you just don’t really think it’s fair that he push those same beliefs on the baby. I know that the Bible says that but you’re also not supposed to judge and stuff and by him doing that it kind of makes him a bit of a hypocrite he’s supposed to love all not just pick and choose.. I don’t really support it but I’m not against it either I see it as it’s not my business and not my place to judge them they just live their life the way the please and the lord above will handle it when it’s their time.. but maybe just express that his child may not agree with him when he’s older and will only resent him if he pushes it on him/her too much. Be kind and gentle about it I know that’s an extremely sensitive subject to some but he also needs to know that you really don’t agree and there should be some kind of compromise