This isn't the easiest thing to talk about but maybe it will help someone .... the first picture you see my son was just a few days old & I wish I knew what was sneaking up on me fast & hard ... I wish I would've saw the signs sooner. I honestly wish I would've told someone how I was feeling... yes I'm talking about the awful PPD . 🙄 I already started feeling uhhhh "not myself " I pushed it off "I'm just getting use to motherhood . "Illl be okay" " I need to be strong for Abel " all I was doing was falling deeper and deeper . I didn't want to get out of bed , I would have nightmares that would keep me up all night . I didn't leave the house & I didn't want anyone around Abel . I started pushing everyone away . I guess I didn't want them to see what was going on with me .. Mark would ask me all the time if I was okay ? "Yes I'm just tired" or " WHAT WOULD BE WRONG WITH ME" ? I started so many fights with him over anything. So my relationship started going down hill with everything else . All because I was "ok" I wouldn't even talk to my family or friends. I didn't want anyone in my life other than Abel . Everyone kept telling me I wasn't acting like myself ! What do they know ? They are just trying to be a ass . I thought everyone was against me ... well one day I woke up and didn't want to feel this way anymore , I knew this wasn't Samantha . I didn't want Abel to see me cry everyday . I didn't want to lose the people that meant the most to me . Well I already did ..mark & I was broken up because he couldn't take the fighting ..& everyone else was done with me blowing them off or being a bitch .. . but I went to the doctor & I told him how I was feeling put me on a pill helped for a little while started going to a new doctor put me on some other stuff didn't help them some more new stuff well a year later I found a medicine that helps me . Yes it was hard getting put on new pills every other day & seeing no hope in sight . But I promise you can have the light at the end of the tunnel.... now in the other two pictures I am happy ... truly happy 😊 mark & I are stronger than ever .. we moved into our own place. Abel is much happier. & im slowing working on all the broken relationship I broke.. its hard but please don't give up . Please talk to someone before it gets to bad . It okay not to be okay . Being a mother is hard , being a wife is hard , being a friend & a daughter is HARD ! Take time to heal & seek the help you need not only for the people around you but for yourself. Yes I'm on medication it helps me feel normal again & maybe some day I won't need it . But I hated myself... I hated the life I was living . I hated that I couldn't be happy about anything . & now I'm enjoying life an it is rubbing off on everyone around me 😏🤗

****Sorry for the long rent ******. 🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️