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Erin Brooks
Erin Brooks
Мама двоих (младенец)

So I've completed day 5. I know I had a lot of tension in my neck and head today. It was a bad day yesterday. Sammy was…

So I've completed day 5. I know I had a lot of tension in my neck and head today. It was a bad day yesterday. Sammy was just completely out of control. I had so much stress and anxiety from all her not listening, over reactions and almost breaking things. She's never malicious but she is just so impulsive before she thinks that things happen, and 9/10 it's not normally me that suffers from her antics. So when I started my practice this morning I knew I had to really to let go so I wouldn't be bringing the tension from yesterday into today. We start every day fresh!

I know if I had had a day like yesterday before all this I would be in tears, crying and breathing myself up for lashing out or thinking I'm a bad mom. But my patients are growing, and I'm able to say "hun I need a moment" so step back focus my breath and come back to the situations a little more chilled. Don't get me wrong I still have those moments but this is giving me the extra patience and ability to relieve some of the anxiety.

While in my practice I'm starting to realize that this time I spend focusing on my breath and working on slowing my thoughts down and just being, is as productive as physically getting something done. I was able to exhale all the tension of yesterday. I'm also noticing that even though my thoughts still wonder I'm able to wrangle them up sooner and come back to focusing on my breathing. We tend to think that if we aren't achieving something physically that we aren't accomplishing anything, but that can not be further from the truth! If we don't take care of our inner self we aren't as affective.

I'm on a 12-day streak and I look forward to this brief time with myself every morning. I'm so thankful for that this business with its positivity, focus on bettering others and it's family came into my life! I am forever changed and forever growing!

I LOVE It!

!!!!LABOR STORY!!!! Saturday at 1AM, lost my mucus plug/bloody show, and I was freaking out! A couple of hours later I…

!!!!LABOR STORY!!!! Saturday at 1AM, lost my mucus plug/bloody show, and I was freaking out! A couple of hours later I had cramping, but felt like BH just a little stronger. They came and went, but felt stronger with each hour. Didn't sleep that whole night! I called the midwife at my hospital and told her I lost it and was having really bad cramping and she told me I was fine and was prob just having BH contractions. The next day I was having what I thought were strong BH contractions every 10-15 mins, but the new City Target had opened across the st from my MiL house in Fenway, (go Red Sox! ⚾ ) and I had to coupon (it is a big coupon week!) so, I went to Target and couponed, hurled over in pain every 10 minutes, coupons in hand 😂😂😢 Went home, contractions were really intense and came every 3-4mins, so around 3am I called the hospital again and said I'm having really bad pains, and I can barely walk. They take my breath away and I think I'm in labor. Again, she said I would be screaming and unable to be so "chatty" if I was in labor, and to stay home and go to sleep. Obviously I couldn't sleep with these killer contractions every 2-3 mins now! Monday morning, July 27 contractions were now every 1-2 minutes, intense like someone was rilling out my insides, I tried rocking on the glider in the nursery, tried soaking in the bathtub, but I was in tears from the pain and from lack of sleep for two nights now, so I told hubby if these aren't labor pains I'm not waiting until I'm actually in labor. Let's to go the hospital and get the Epidural (my plan was to go natural) and he's like ok let's go. Arrived at the hospital around 10:15, got admitted, sat around moaning while the nurses told me relax, you'll catch your breath, we will get you a room in a minute. Meanwhile I'm in a wheelchair doubled over barely able to breathe. I thought I was going to pass out from the pain! Got into a room, they listened to baby's heartbeat, and midwife came in to check for dilation. "Oh my god I don't even feel much cervix. You're 9cm dilated honey let's go push!" I almost passed out at that point! I told her I can't do this it hurts soooo bad. But we got into a room, I pushed for the longest ten minutes of my life and out he came! I tore and got stitches, but not from end to end thank god. Still sore and uterus is cramping but everything else is going well. Breastfeeding is so hard! We will get there though! Third night of no sleep so don't mind the bags under my eyes hahaha And yes I am going to hunt down that darn midwife who told me to stay at home cuz I was fine and not in labor! Smh I had a CVS coupon trip planned for yesterday, but I'll take Ezra any day! So glad I pulled through with my plan though. It feels so empowering! Not saying next time I'd do it again 😂😂😂

LADIES !!!!! IM IN SHOCK!!!! so my period showed up a day earlier than expected, as you know I took those two blue dyes,…

LADIES !!!!! IM IN SHOCK!!!! so my period showed up a day earlier than expected, as you know I took those two blue dyes, both had a faint positive. Well the next day, I tested with a FRER and a Walmart 88 cent test and both were very very negative. Then I had a temp drop below coverline. AF showed the following day, a day early. I just knew i was out !! Well, yesterday I was sick as hell when I woke up, i get to work, and discover that my boobs are very sore as i ran into a wall coming around the corner, lol.. i NEVER get sore breasts or nauseated during my period.. EVER !!! Something told me to take a pregnancy test although I had been bleeding for 3 days at this point. Today makes 4 !!! Still bleeding, and even had clotting!! To my surprise, myy test was positive !!!! I tested again this morning, and it's even darker !!!! How is this even possible.. I dont know what's going on, I'm in total disbelief right now!!! 10dpo, my FRER was negative, no hint of a line at all!!! Here I am, 14dpo, bleeding for 4 days now, with a positive test that keeps getting darker !!! Looking at my chart it looks like baby implanted on the same exact day AF was actually due, although it showed a day early!! I took my period off of my chart so you ladies could see my chart as a whole, but my period started on cd32, the last day of the big temp drop.. now the temps are back up !!! The test I took yesterday evening is the dried one.. its yellow tinted as it's old . The other is from this morning , first morning urine !!