I'm going to vent and I don't care what anyone says I just need this for me!!!!

I'm going to vent and I don't care what anyone says I just need this for me!!!!

Ughhh I don't get why I'm so paranoid/self conscious about being a petite pregnant woman... I've always been petite. Heck i used to get called names(anorexic, twig, skinny Minnie, stick, thin mint, etc.) for it, but I never gave a care in the world because I was proud of it. I was healthy and small so what if others hated me for that. I didn't care. Now that I'm pregnant with my second son I'm the most paranoid/self conscious girl ever. My husband says I look fine and beautiful as always which I appreciate but I still just don't feel like I did last time. I lost all my baby weight plus like 3 or 4 extra pounds last go around and yet this time I seem to be packing on the weight so much faster and I feel like I snack a lot more. I try not to snack as much because last appointment I got in trouble for gaining 9lbs instead of just the normal 1-3lbs that they recommend... but yet I feel guilty and I don't want to do much of anything and I'm just emotional about a lot of petty shit. I really can't wait til April/May for this to be over with; I'm so over being pregnant already because I haven't been/felt like "Me" this entire pregnancy..... rant over, also I know this has been like my 3rd post this wk or so about my weight but like I said I can't help how paranoid/self conscious I feel