Trigger. Lost baby

Went in for my 20 week check up and found out our son had passed away. Nothing was wrong, my pregnancy has been going great. I'm so numb right now. I'll he delivering him later this week. I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. Not before Christmas. How am I'm going to tell my kids?? My dear sweet baby boy. Why did this happen?

So I'm thinking of baby girl names , because I pray that baby number two is a girl 👑

My son's name is Eli & I would like for her to have an "E" name like my son.

So far I have three I like

Elle

Eva

Eliza

Short, simple and unique 😍 Any more you ladies can think of besides Elizabeth lol ?

Sooooo Athena has to have the surgery 😥😥😥😥 I've been bawling I'm a mess ! I can't believe this is happening to my poor child ! Why ? What did I do that caused this ? I'm seriously on my knees bawling ! As much as I tried to prepare myself, I wasn't ready to hear those words . In 3 months she will have her cranial surgery & I pray to God she has a easy & speedy recovery ! Please pray for my baby ladies ! She really needs them !

Yay for migraines I have them almost everyday, sometimes with nose bleeds sometimes not. Today my nose bleed was so bad it was pouring out of my nose and I couldn’t breathe and was choking on the blood going down my throat. This is after it calmed down.🙃

Birth Plan Rant

I used to be all about getting an epidural, but after research and thinking about it more I want to have an unmedicated birth (this is my first baby). What annoys me is when I say that I'm going to TRY my hardest to have a natural and unmedicated birth people always feel the need to say that I'm crazy or that I'm going to change my mind when I get in that position. Or that epidurals are the best. I do realize that plans change, but why can't people be supportive and encouraging?