I try not to be a negative Nancy, but things have been really hard lately. Had to get my gallbladder removed, go back to work next week but haven't been able to find good child care, can't afford child care, can't afford bills, my unemployment benefits were suspended and I have to pay back $609 to them since I'm supposedly considered not able to work, it's just been struggle after struggle and it's finally taking its toll. I try so hard to be the positive one and to keep a game face on for my girls but I'm tired of the trials. It's holiday season and I'm dreading it. The little assistance we get from food stamps will end starting next month. I just don't know what to do at this point. I look at my kids and want to cry because I feel like a failure as a mother. I can't buy my oldest clothes or shoes that she needs and her good for nothing sperm donor never pays child support. I can't buy diapers for my little one. I can't even produce enough breastmilk for her and had to start supplementing with formula. Just need something positive to happen. A rainbow in this storm of shit.