For any suffering from depression I feel deeply for you. I know you've heard this 1000000 times but please try and reach out to someone. You may not see how much you mean to people but I promise you do. My sister took her own life this last week and even with all the problems we had growing up I miss her dearly. I regret not trying harder to show how much sge meant to me. I never would have thought this would happen in a million years. My daughter was never able to meet her aunt and the world has lost an amazingly talented individual. Please try s get help. No matter how much you think you don't matter, you do.