@kala_elise So true. Me and my husband are always talking about how we want to actually ask our children what's the matter when they're "misbehaving". Makes me upset when parents feel like they have the right to shout to their kids and treat them different from adult humans.
@miicat, we actually are one of those families who still have family meetings... we have discussions and ask the kids their opinions about stuff. we explain things to them if they're doing something wrong (rather than screaming at them)... one of our kids actually told us that when the parents are screaming, it makes them want to scream at each other (or feel like it's ok to do so).
@kala_elise That's wonderful! And exactly another reason why impulsively shouting to your kids is a bad idea! It gives them the example that it's acceptable to do so. If onw thing ive learned through analysing my and other people's childhood experiences, is that kids learn more from the example that parents give than what they're being told by them.
@miicat, so true! and I've also learned that you get more results with positive reinforcement than with negativity..... Even just telling your child that you're disappointed in their behavior and actions will have a greater impact because it'll make them feel bad and they'll reevaluate their actions. People don't give kids enough credit, they understand a whole lot more than we give them credit for!
@kala_elise Yes that's a very smart way of disciplining. If they can see that you mean it then it WILL sink in eventually. But not through shouting. Actual conversation is important because we become blinded by emotion when we express things out like that. And it's a bit more work, but actually making an effort to catch your kids doing something good and then complimenting them is an awesome way to reinforce behaviour too 😄
Melodie·
В ожидании первенца
My gosh yes!! Thank you for posting this. Such an important message.
Kala Elise·
Многодетная мама (5 детей)
@miicat, of course! I wish everyone thought this way! so many parents lack understanding with their children and it's really sad.
Melodie·
В ожидании первенца
@kala_elise So true. Me and my husband are always talking about how we want to actually ask our children what's the matter when they're "misbehaving". Makes me upset when parents feel like they have the right to shout to their kids and treat them different from adult humans.
Kala Elise·
Многодетная мама (5 детей)
@miicat, we actually are one of those families who still have family meetings... we have discussions and ask the kids their opinions about stuff. we explain things to them if they're doing something wrong (rather than screaming at them)... one of our kids actually told us that when the parents are screaming, it makes them want to scream at each other (or feel like it's ok to do so).
Melodie·
В ожидании первенца
@kala_elise That's wonderful! And exactly another reason why impulsively shouting to your kids is a bad idea! It gives them the example that it's acceptable to do so. If onw thing ive learned through analysing my and other people's childhood experiences, is that kids learn more from the example that parents give than what they're being told by them.
Kala Elise·
Многодетная мама (5 детей)
@miicat, so true! and I've also learned that you get more results with positive reinforcement than with negativity..... Even just telling your child that you're disappointed in their behavior and actions will have a greater impact because it'll make them feel bad and they'll reevaluate their actions. People don't give kids enough credit, they understand a whole lot more than we give them credit for!
Melodie·
В ожидании первенца
@kala_elise Yes that's a very smart way of disciplining. If they can see that you mean it then it WILL sink in eventually. But not through shouting. Actual conversation is important because we become blinded by emotion when we express things out like that. And it's a bit more work, but actually making an effort to catch your kids doing something good and then complimenting them is an awesome way to reinforce behaviour too 😄