Going to have a bit of a vent because I need to let some steam out and need some honesty ladies.. I…
Going to have a bit of a vent because I need to let some steam out and need some honesty ladies.. I can handle it (I think 😕 lol) OK.. my partner has a 6 year old daughter with a partner in his past (19 at the time) basically they split before she was born but he did see her when she was here however not for the first few months due to personal reasons. after then he would take her whenever he could and every other weekend however one weekend he had to cancel as his nan went in hospital but she thought he was just going out with the lads.. since then she's refused him access (she didn't put him on the birth certificate either) and they've had the same argument every couple of months about him wanting to see her and she has refused calling him a shit dad. Move forward a few years she's got a new partner and had a few more kids and we're pregnant with our little girl.. she has very recently split up from her (abusive) partner and now is messaging my partner about them meeting up to start allowing his daughter to build a relationship with him.. I whole heartidly do not have an issue with him seeing his daughter again I'm really happy for him my issue is her! why when she was with her partner was he a shit dad etc etc even said she made his daughter call her partner dad and he wasn't allowed to build this relationship up but now she's away from him and she wants to meet at a local park just the 3 of them to start building a relationship? all those things she would say and call him just don't seem to be an issue and she wants to have conversations with him 😒 I'm not jealous of her and I trust my partner 100% but it still makes me angry how she's being now when this could have been done a long time ago not 3 weeks before I was due 😣 my question at the end of all this (sorry) is.. am I in the wrong for being angry? or is it my hormones 😥😥 lol
Rachel·
Мама троих детей, ждёт четвёртого
if this meeting happens then you go with him, sorry but your a couple expecting a baby and you come as a package! if the ex doesn't like it then she clearly isn't doing it for her daughter (just my opinion) xx
Mio·
Мама дочки-младенца
@raych, I have to agree too... If she's doing it for her daughter to have a relationship with your OH, then the appropriate thing is to let you go with your OH to meet up with her daughter. xx
steph·
Мама четверых детей, беременна
I agree with the other ladies, ur a family with a baby on the way so u will be involved in his daughters life so start as u all mean to go on and do it together xx
Beth·
Мама сына (2 года), беременна (39 нед.)
No your not being silly!! Id be furious lol! Maybe she's realised how wrong she was and is trying to get things right or maybe she's lonely and has an ulterior motive (hope I spelt that right) 😂 I hope it's the first one.. But only time can tell and maybe get your partner to say that your a couple with a big future and his daughter would need to build a relationship with you too!! And see how/what she replies xxx
Sweet Sesame·
Мама дочки (8 лет), беременна (35 нед.)
I've private messaged you as I didn't wanna post for all to see x
Claire·
В ожидании первенца
Thanks for all replying.. and well it does make you think that doesn't it @beadyeyes93 ? I don't know I said I don't mind him going alone because I know he needs to build the relationship first with his daughter but she's made me so mad I want to go now.. she messaged him saying 'well will your girlfriend not mind you being alone around me' and it just made me furious like why would there be a reason? I know she's going to go all caked in makeup and dressed up and if I go I'll waddle up with my huge belly.. not that I don't love why I have a huge belly but 😔 I don't want to ruin the chance he has by being all hormonal but I feel like she needs to realise this is only for his daughter not her chance to build a relationship as well xx @raych @mioaurellia @safiamammy1
tresea·
Мама дочки (1 год), беременна (33 нед.)
I see what the other women are saying about you going with him as your a family and expecting a baby but I do think seeing as he hasn't had a relationship with her in so long maybe it would be to much for he's daughter meeting you all at once I 100% think after they have billet there relationship you should be involved and she should meet your chill but just think it might be a bit much all at once but I don't blame you at all for being upset for the way shes handled things as I think she's probably doing it because she's lonely not for her child because if she was doing it for her daughter then she would have done it a long time ago as for the messages can't you tell your oh to ask her to only message him about his daughter and that he's not interested in speaking to her about there personal lives not sure if any of this will help as I don't have any exs and my husband didn't have any serious relationships before me (we got together really young) xx
Mio·
Мама дочки-младенца
@clairey, not a problem hun. we're here to help. but like what @beadyeyes93 said, it also makes me wonder if the reason your OH's ex asked him to meet up with her and his daughter was not only about just meeting up and that she has an ulterior motive (I didn't want to mention this because I didn't want to upset you). Listen hunnie, she's lonely and sometimes people (men and women) do things when they feel lonely. If you can go with him when he's meeting up with his daughter, it'll be better. So his ex is clear that it is in fact just about building a relationship with his daughter and not his ex. I would want you to be involved so you know what is going on. xx