So my SO has been looking around at colleges trying to get an idea of how to enroll and go to school...he wants to either try and be a teacher, or mayne a nurse if he can...well one of them called him this morning and has been talking and apparently he just enrolled without even discussing this with me. WTF? I mean shit, I know he wants to further his education for a better job, I totally understand and support this. But we are living paycheck to paycheck, our credit cards are maxed out and we have to oay over 1k to get out of our last phone contract before we get reembursed by our new phone company for that money. How in the flying fuck does he expect us to fucking pay for college??? SHIT. We can barely pay fucking RENT, we only have $600 left in our savings because the past two months we have had to pull out money to help oay bills. I AM FUCKING FREAKING OUT. And I have no fucking control over SHIT because I can't go back to work yet 😣😣😣😣😣
Thank you @myliltadpole1116 and @babynessa, I appreciate your comments...I'm going to be off preggie for a while in light of what is happening so this will be my last reply for a while. My SO is getting ready for work now and has assured me he loves me and my opinion matters, he asked if I wanted him to tell the guy he needs to think about it and of course I told him no, go ahead and continue because I won't hold him back. Doesn't mean I'm not hurt but it doesn't really matter anyways because this isn't my decision. Thanks again...
There's Financial Aid, FAFSA, grants, scholarships, and loans. My sister has five kids goes to college full time and lives pay check to pay check and her entire college is paid for through financial aid and fafsa. I live pay check to pay check and I'm a full time college student and i use fafsa and loans.Theres ways to go to school and not pay. But he should have talked to you about it before he signed up for college. You guys are together so decisions should be made as a team. Hope you get your time to discuss this with him.
@hellosweetie, it will get better hun. He should have talked to you and I would be feeling exactly just as you are if my so had gone and done that because as great as a future would be, bills that are due now won't wait for later. I read a little piece that said he's done things like this before( Just going and doing something) have u talked to him about how you feel when he doesn't include you?i know how It's hard to be happy for someone when they blindside you like that..but he is wanting to better himself and as wrong as it was to bypass a conversation with you, at least he's got the motivation.. If your religious or spiritual just pray Hun God will hear you, it takes time but it will pan out. Take deep breaths and center yourself again , it will be okay😘❤️
Just leave me alone, okay?? You don't know my struggles. You know nothing about me. And I am already crying my eyes out enough I don't need you in here making me feel more depressed and worthless. I'm done. Go pick on someone else's feelings, bully. @halsey11
I've been a SAHM for 6 years. So I'm not sure why you are trying to use that as a crutch to feel minuscule. SAHM actually have a very tough job. Good luck.
Oh for goodness sake get off your high horse. Have you heard one word I've been saying?? Obviously not because I have said numerus times that all I want is for him to discuss things before making major ass decisions. But no, that's okay, apparently my opinion doesn't fucking matter here nor there so why the fuck should I even try?? I have crippling anxiety and depression but that's fine, I don't matter because I am the lowly SAHM so nothing I say or do matters, my place is at home being a glorified house keeper and baby sitter. I better know my place, right?? Our "partnership" is a joke apparently. @halsey11
Oh okay, I get it. You were looking for others to agree with you and talk about how horrible he is for trying to better his future. You're right, he's an insensitive ass for not getting your approval first. 👌🏼
I am gonna have to politely ask that we stop this conversation here because obviously you're not seeing my side of things and I am looking for a place to vent my frustrations and get support from someone who may actually sympathize with me, not someone to judge me for feeling this way. As I said, bottom line is, he should have discussed this with me. I would NEVER make a decision like this without discussing it with him first. I wouldn't go and put in applications for a job without first discussing if he is okay with trying to figure out how I can go back to work, so it is a two-way street. In order for it to be a partnership we need to be on the same page, and he didn't even give me the luxery of knowing what was going on before he jumped into this. @halsey11
Well maybe if he goes to college and gets a degree you guys wouldn't be so bad off financially? Like the only way to do better is to make changes. I have four kids, 33 weeks pregnant; my husband works close to 60 hrs a week. You have to make time for things/sacrifice things, especially if you don't want to be stuck in the same position that you're in now. You can't blame him for trying to better his life, your life and your child's life. Especially if he does online courses, it won't be that bad. It's also your job as a "partner" to be supportive.
@alexislopez, thank you...I dunno what we're going to do yet I am waiting for him to get off the phone now to talk but I am boiling right now because he didn't even discuss this life-changing decision with me, I have literally no control over my own life or anything that goes on in our partnership and this is not helping my anxiety and depression, I am on the verge of panic attack right now 😣
Apparently that's what I get for wanting some damn support from other mommies....so it's okay to complain about wanting our babies out too soon but not this? I get it. @halsey11
I'm sorry but I am not looking for someone to come in here calling me selfish. You have no idea what I go through every day. In appreciate your input regarding the financial aid and hope that he qualifies to do this without out of pocket costs, but that isn't all there is to it. We are PARTNERS, which means all major decisions should be DISCUSSED between the two of us before deciding. And he didn't. He is jumping right into this without even discussing this with me, which makes it seem like obviously my opinion doesn't matter and we AREN'T partners like we're supposed to be, because I have no say. I have no means of transportation and he already works over 40 hours a week, we barely get our shopping done let alone my doctor's appointments and our daughter's doctor's appointments. We don't even get to be intimate more than once a month because he is always so tired and I appreciate all the work he does for us but this is only gonna push us away even further from each other and limit our time together and with his DAUGHTER even more. I can't even go back to work yet even though I have wanted to for months now, so I am literally stuck in this damn house all day every day with nowhere to go. Bottom line is, we could have discussed this and he could have told me his fucking plans to reassure me and I would be okay and supportive but NO, he is jumping right into this without even fucking THINKING about it. So again, thanks but you know nothing about me and I am not selfish and you ARE rude for saying so.
I don't think your being selfish mama. I would be freaking out too. Living paycheck by paycheck is stressful enough! Hope you guys works it out!
Uhm not to be rude but I think you're being selfish. If he gets federal aid, which he should of y'all are as bad off financially as you said above; the federal aid will pay for it all. He would probably even get money back once his tuition is paid. My husband makes over 50K a year and my college is completely funded by pell grants and scholarships. And i STILL get 4K back a year. @hellosweetie
It is you decision as well as him. I'm glad you guys talked. Hopefully everything works out for you guys. Keep your head up mama try not to be sad. 💕 @hellosweetie