@lucyjade, you've enlightened me and you were right. She's my girl and I'm proud of her. even though she's 23+ weeks old but she was alive inside me. I'd just like to share her picture with all of you but it'd be nice if you don't say anything negative about her. After all she's my daughter, my flesh and blood. I'm not afraid to share her with you all, because all these 6 months, you've been all so helpful and so lovely towards me. Here's Melody Aurelia... I've edited her pic; cleaned up the wrinkled skin and adjusted her skin tone and I intend to use this pic for her funeral... xx
Thank you @heavenscent83 ! you're so kind. I still feel terrible for what happened. I kept telling myself what a waste of a someone's life who's been trying to survive for 6 months. If she wasn't meant for this life, then Life shouldn't have given her a chance in the beginning, rather than giving her the chance to grow and then take her away like that. She must have felt horrible as well. I wish I knew what she felt during the last moments before she passed away.. xx
@mioaurellia, awwwwww melody is absolutely beautiful, what a little angel, I know it's hard but don't ever feel like you have failed your little girl, you did a great job, she was just too beautiful for this earth and the angels wanted to keep her xx
Aww @mioaurellia it is so sad but just remember it's not as a result of anything you did wrong. Writing to her is a nice idea though. Again I'm so sorry for your loss, it will take a lot of time to heal. I hope you are getting lots of support from friends and family xx
I try not to think I'm a failure.. but the thought of her lying in the mortuary just made me think I did her wrong. I tried not to blame myself for it but it's difficult to not blame myself for what happened. I was the only one she had during the 6 months. I Should've been her protector but I didn't do what I was meant to do. I kept asking for her forgiveness everytime I see her or when I write to her even though I don't know what for. she made me whole again but when she left , I was left with a broken heart that was broken into tiny pieces like grains of sand that can't be glued back. xx @angie87
@mioaurellia, please don't think of it as a failure to bring her to life as you made something really beautiful but for whatever reason it wasn't meant to be. It's so unfair you have to say goodbye to your little angel so soon but you will always be her mummy and you did an amazing job xx
@angie87, thank you, I'm barely hanging on. I went to see her today but each time I think about her I just can't help but to think "why her? why do unborn babies have to be sacrificed in this way?" it just makes me so sad to even think I failed to bring her to life, to let her see the world. We didn't get to say Hello, but we have to say goodbye. xx
I was about 7/8 years old so I don't remember much. But they did an then left it. But they didn't go back to that hospital. Then on they went to London hospital in Whitechapel
@tam443, I'm very sorry to hear that. Did your aunt file a complain or ask for some kind of compensation? I know it was 21 years ago but medical negligence can't be tolerated. especially when it comes to people's lives xx
@tam443, oh I'm not upset my dear. I just thought stillborn might upset others but I'm okay with that term. Born sleeping seems to sound more like my child is at peace somehow.. xx
@natzie86, I'm not upset dear... In fact, I went to a psychic a few years ago and he asked me if I had a child that was born asleep. I said no. then he said well, that would happen one day and he or she would be looking looking and watching over me. All these years I had been skeptical because all I had was early miscarriages but not a stillborn. so I'm guessing Melody was the child he was mentioning about... xx
I didn't mean to upset you @mioaurellia I just thought this lady needed to know as she had commented on here not knowing what had happened. Melody will always have you as her mummy even if she is not here in body she will always be here in spirit. Some babies are to precious to walk this earth so they are here for us in Angel form and that is what melody is, she's your angel. I've lost babies in pregnancy but not as far on as yourself and I strongly believe they are always here beside me looking after me and sometimes playing jokes on me (according to a psychic) and this brings me comfort and I hope it does you too. Stay strong and remember melody is always with you in your heart and your mind.
@natzie86, @tam443 yes she's at peace now. She's sleeping in the mortuary at the moment.. Heart aches when I think she's probably feeling cold and lonely just like her mummy xx
@amy101, @baby316 @rachaellw @hannah2310 @natzie86 @mrsmowmow thank you very much for the kind words. I'm sure she's at peace and that she's sleeping real tight and having the sweetest dream... @tam443 she was 23+ weeks, very close to 24 weeks in fact. I knew instantly she was my baby when I saw her nose. I feel so honored to have my nose on her xx
@mioaurellia, I'm glad my words helped & helped you decide to share the photo. She's perfect in every way and completely at peace. Nothing can hurt her where she is now & I feel honoured that you shared her photo with us. I'm not religious but I will say a prayer for you & you will always be in my thoughts xxx
You're welcome. I think it's a bit unfair if I decide to not share her pic with you ladies because you've all been with me when I was pregnant, this is what I can do in return at least. xx @purity463