Confession I'm so not proud of 😔....

My entire life everyone around me smoked cigarettes and it literally made me SICK. I mean literally sick to smell them or be around the smoke. Well fast forward to the end of my pregnancy.. Weirdest craving ever I craved the smell of cigarettes fresh in the pack, the menthol smell. Then I ended up craving smoking a cigarette. Of coarse I never gave in to that craving but a month after I gave birth craving is still there. I buy a pack and smoke one and I didn't hate it? So I've been smoking like one a week and I'm so disgusted at myself and no one knows about it. All the people I've judged and lectured and now I smoked? Ugh I'm so disgusted lol I'm stopping but I'm just disturbed that I actually CRAVED this. Feel free to judge me lol