having a panic attack. I'm a type one diabetic and I'm just short of 27 weeks pregnant with my first child, my little boy. The past few weeks as I head into the third trimester my blood sugars have been dangerously high even though I haven't changed any of my regimen. I go in to see my Maternal Fetal Medicine OB tomorrow and I was warned over the phone that they will likely admit me to the hospital for a few days to get my blood sugars down and stable. I know that being admitted is something I have to do for my son and I'm okay with that part, what I'm struggling with is the feelings of guilt. how can I expect to be a good mom for him once he's out of me if my doctors make me feel like I can't commit to being a good mom while he's inside of me! I know I love him and so does anyone that talks to me for more than a few minutes, my whole world revolves around this little boy, but I can't help but wonder if I'm his best chance. :'( I'm so terrified to go see my doctor tomorrow because he's not very good with bedside manner, he's very blunt and no nonsense, the last time I cried in his office he simply walked out on me. I love my son and I only have 10 more weeks until he's here, but I am FREAKING out over this.

sorry ladies I don't mean to unload on you like that I just can't post this to fb.