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thoughts on not being married, still pretty young, and not …

thoughts on not being married, still pretty young, and not knowing how things are going to turn out between the two of us. who's last name should baby have moms or dads?


— the last name gives no legal bearing whatsoever. its the acknowledgment of paternity that does if you're worried about custody.

— both of my older children have my last name. now with this little one dad wants his last name. I'm hesitant cause right now I can't stand him. and I'm pretty sure we won't be getting married anytime soon. so all 3 of my children will continue to have my last name. maybe once we are done with the hormones I might have a change of heart. if anything I'll have to pay for the 3 of them to have there last names hypenated.

— I made the mistake of giving my boys their biological father's last name. I won't do it this time with my daughter. My boys biological father is no longer involved in their lives, but the court won't allow me to change it. My daughters father isn't going to be involved with her either so she is getting my last name.

— i thought the men would have rights as long as they sign the birth certificate.

— I feel that if you don't give the baby his last name and y'all do stay together, it might cause a huge problem between y'all that could've been avoided. It's honestly all about if he's going to be their for his child or not.

— yeah that's what ive been feeling. its good to know other people are on the same page. thank you for your help 😊 @motherlotus

— I feel you on being scared about him having leverage on you... My daughters dad is an asshat like that too.. It sounds to me like you should give baby your last name. Especially if you're feeling like that now!

— its up to you momma my first two kids have their dads but my last baby won't so its your choice

— I'm just afraid that if anything were to go bad between us that he would have leverage over me, and what goes on with the baby because she has his last name. idk if that's me just being paranoid, its just he and I have a rocky past and as much as i would like to say we'll end up being together I honestly have no idea how its going to go. @rockysmommy @showersoverflowers @lilfree16 @motherlotus

— I was 17 and my daughters dad wasn't around when she was born, but she took both of our names. He's now around and has visitation and tells her she has his last name and it's SO annoying.. I wish I gave her just mine. But at the same time, that is her family and it's who she is. I figure when the time comes she can decide which one she wants to use when writing it down on school papers and what not. My son born in June will take my boyfriends last name. We plan on staying together but if we didn't I won't be upset that he has his dad's name. He's going to be in his life. If he wasn't, I'd give him my name.

— if the father is in the baby's life ...why cant the child have his name? i think its petty if hes going to be there.

— my son has my name! I am married now and I still haven't changed my name. I will hyphenate this baby's name. My husband doesnt like it but I want our boys to have the same last name

— I think that if you know even if things don't work out the father will still be in baby's life, it should be dads. It's his child too and that's just how things are in my eyes. But if it's not going to work out and hes not going to be around the child, give him yours.

— I had my mom's until my step dad adopted me.

— I say moms. Don't do both, my mom did that and I absolutely hated it. And was pissed at her for years because of it.