Trigger. Lost baby

Went in for my 20 week check up and found out our son had passed away. Nothing was wrong, my pregnancy has been going great. I'm so numb right now. I'll he delivering him later this week. I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. Not before Christmas. How am I'm going to tell my kids?? My dear sweet baby boy. Why did this happen?

Please help!

My doctor is trying to induce me before 40 weeks because she's going to be off on my due date and says my placenta is starting to look old. How do I get labor started?? I don't want to be induced for no reason and I'm thinking I won't have a choice. Please help. What do I do to get things going?

I'm going to a dance club tomorrow night. For the first time in my adult life ?. I'm really excited. What outfit should I wear?

Birth Plan Rant

I used to be all about getting an epidural, but after research and thinking about it more I want to have an unmedicated birth (this is my first baby). What annoys me is when I say that I'm going to TRY my hardest to have a natural and unmedicated birth people always feel the need to say that I'm crazy or that I'm going to change my mind when I get in that position. Or that epidurals are the best. I do realize that plans change, but why can't people be supportive and encouraging?

Took this lastnight...and I'm not sure how I should feel. I've made a terrible mistake by having sex so soon after having a baby but it has made such a precious thing. I really don't want to have an abortion but my Fiancé does. I understand why he wants to go that route but I just would feel absolutely terrible about doing that. I cried all night...I really don't know what to do. PLEASE NO JUDGING IM ONLY POSTING THIS FOR SUPPORT.