I'm about fed up with the way my boyfriend is about our son. He NEVER helps. I change him I feed him I hold him when he cries I put him to bed I bathe him... everything. He holds him every now and then in public. When he holds him at home he just puts him on his chest and plays Xbox while our son cries and squirms so I end up getting him and actually holding him. His off day is today and he said he'd give me an off day but didn't get our of bed until minutes ago (it's 130) and I'm still tending to our son while my boyfriend lays on the couch. I'm tired and upset and I need a shower badly. I don't eat during the day cause my son has been crying a lot and won't let you put him down. That also goes for showering. I can't tell you when the last time I showered was. I feel so gross and worn out :'(
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Omg!!! I completely agree with you @lyndsie94 when it comes to not letting your baby cry and scream. Don't apologize for tending to your child and showing them love. You are by no means spoiling them. Studies have shown that babies who have their needs met become more independent and confident because they know someone will be there when the time comes. I grew up in a very old school type if family and I would never want that for my child. @brooklynnesmommy1203
I'm sorry I'm not the type to let my baby cry and scream while I just sit there. I want my baby to know if he needs me I'm there. If that means he's spoiled and I have to make some sacrifices for a while so be it. I have severe anxiety issues and panic attacks because of never having anyone when needed. I had it all throughout pregnancy and I passed anxiety to my son. He has separation anxiety. The doctor even said rats the case. Has since day one. So it's not me "spoiling him" or anything like that @brooklynnesmommy1203
And thank you ladies for your help @deviildeee @madyline @ausipipilo @babyvicky2016 @aidensmommyy
I know this is kind of completely off your topic.....and I'm completely for picking your baby up when it cries (eventually)....but if you continuously do it you son or daughter will learn all they have to do is cry or whine and you will run to tend to them....I was raised in an old-school type of family.....where a baby needed to learn that just because he or she cries doesn't necessarily mean mommy is going to come running.....this may be why you don't have time for even a shower.....oh and put your foot down with your man
exactly you need to be firm! you both made that baby so now it's both of your responsibility to take care of him! I'm sure it's not going to kill him to entertain the baby for a little bit while you shower or eat. if he wants to be a baby and act mad just because you want to do something do the same back. act mad that he's not helping you it has to be fair!
I agree with @ausipipilo. I would definitely put my foot down. That's just ridiculous. I haven't had my baby girl yet but I already bought a Moby wrap and practiced tying it and it really wasn't that hard. I just watched a video. You should try it and if you don't like it just return it. I hope things get better for you. I'm really sorry.
Don't ever be afraid to ask him for help, even if he whines and complains about. You just birthed his child, and that is not something anyone should take lightly. So, if you want to take a shower, you should damn well be considered enough by him to let you do so without complaining. And if he complains, just realize that that is his own problem and that he needs to grow up, bc raising a baby takes a lot of work and if he wants to be a part of you and your babies life he better step up. Sorry if I am being so harsh, but never take no for an answer if you need help with something like showering or eating food my dear.
I've talked to him about it. I even reached a point I told him I'm leaving. he started helping a lot more for like 2 days then slipped into his old habits again. I didn't get a Moby wrap cause they kinda scare me cause of having to tie it. He's heavy and I wanna know it supports him. My boyfriend huffed and puffed yesterday when I asked if I could take a shower. He acted mad. So I just said nevermind and took my son back.
I definitely understand, my boyfriend was the same way until I talked to him about it. About the baby never wanting to be put down my EmmaLee is the same way. He works ten hour shifts, so the only way I ever get anything done is using my Moby wrap. It keeps her on my chest in a natural position and let's me be hands free so I can eat/clean or get some work done (I work from home) if you can find one is totally suggest it.
Have you tried talking to him the way u feel.. And how the baby doesn't get much attention from him and might cause problems ..
you guys are getting way to offensive for first time mom's....I never once said sit there and ignore you child and let them scream for hours at a time did I???? no exactly....so in the end there is no reason to make it out like I would leave my. child in her bassinet to scream no I wouldn't most definitely not.....