Sorry for the rant, but it seems this message board is the only sort of communication i have to talk about these things. my fiance keeps stealing my body pillow (my saving grace for a good sleep and a not so painful day with my hip killing me) because he wants me to cuddle with him instead of the pillow. if im lucky I'll wake up later, and he hasnt been laying on top of it, and steal it back. he's been bugging me for sex too after he gets off work, but im apparently expected to shower and shave down there beforehand. (I shower at night, so I dont really find myself to be uncleanly 8 hours later when I've just been laying around the house.) So not only am i being asked for something im not in the mood for since pregnancy has pretty much killed my libido after the first trimester, but I also cant stand the razor burn I get, so the second part certainly isn't happening. (it's also only been a little over a week since we had sex, and he's back to bugging me every day for it) I've tried talking to him about it, but he just sees it as I dont find him attractive anymore. Then that leaves me feeling guilty because it isn't the case at all. Am I just losing my mind thinking that this is kinda unreasonable?
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it is so rare to get a man who understands things outside of his own bubble. I got really lucky and my bf reads everything I do about baby and sometimes finds stuff for me to read. this is pregnancy number 5 and he was the one who pushed me to take a test. I thought my body was just being wiered again. it is really different to have a guy who gets it. he even just moved our recliner into our room so when my hips are hurting I can sleep in it. I'm not really trying to brag just to illustrate how rare it is. this is his first child. he is 29. my x husband dad to the rest of my kiddos was the self centered all about me guy. he wouldn't even help put together baby furniture and complained about having to carry laundry baskets up and down the stairs for me. so yes ladies I feel your pain.
I TOTALLY understand what you mean @lilman1115 my husband is the exact same way!!!! He constantly asks for sex every night. It hasn't even been a week yet and when I say no. He's all like why don't you let me love you? I just wanna make love to my wife. Why don't you want me. Blah blah blah. And it makes me feel bad. But I can't help it if I don't want to I don't want to. And he doesn't understand that. So I feel you! All you can do is deal with their whining. Pretty soon they'll be dealing with another little whining and you can tell him that's how you felt. Lol
yeah. apparently I am supposed to have reasons when I cry and when I get upset...hormones excuse doesnt really work anymore and I just get made fun of for it. I just try my best day to day with him and deal the best I can.
Boyfriends or finances* thought it in my head forgot to type it lol
husbands will never fully understand a pregnant women nor will we ever understand a males perspective of the other end. Just try and talk to him let him know how you feel and if you have to blow up at eachother then kiss and make up aftet. what my husband and i had to do because it got to the point i bottled everything up (emotion wise) and so did he. Let him know why you need your body pillow and try to reasonable when he asks stupid questions cause i can gaurentee that will Def happen lol
hah, I doubt he'd read the book if I got one. I do my reading online mostly like on whattoexpect website and stuff. sometimes he almost seems bothered by everything concerning the baby, and other days he's happy to bring up the topic himself and talk about after baby is here moments. he forgot about the maternity ward tour when I had reminded him daily for a week leading up to it. I had to work that morning, got home and he was already drinking. he told me if he would've known, then he wouldn't have been drinking. Since he had, he couldn't go. I was left to be the only one there without their partner. im also in that crazy nesting mode, but when I ask where im supposed to put the baby's stuff, he says he doesnt know. we just dont have the space. (we do, but it's going to be tight. we are in a 1bd apt. 2 adults, 3 lizards in two very large tanks, and "his desk") he is insistant on his computer desk, his two lizards in their tank, and our bed belong in the bedroom. that leaves my lizard and his tank on the floor in our living room and all the baby stuff I have so far piled in the corner. it is driving me insane!!
And stealing your body pillow is just wrong!!
Okay the whole shaving thing ridiculous. Wtf.. And it's only been a little over a week he won't die. That's why there's "self pleasure". Luckily I haven't really lost my libido. But there are days where my hubby is in the mood and I'm not and he is completely understanding. Your husband should understand that your body is going through hectic changes therefore when u say u don't want something it's not really in your control. Do u have pregnancy books cause my hubby read these books when we first found out we were expecting and because of that he knows what I'm going through and understands a lot better. Who knows maybe in a week you'll want him everyday and he will be exhausted lol. Pregnancy is odd like that. Good luck
I think that they either get it or they don't. try talking to him and make sure to use the words I FEEL a lot.