How does your baby daddy/boyfriend/husband get ready to go somewhere or get ready to end the day?
How does your baby daddy/boyfriend/husband get ready to go somewhere or get ready to end the day?
Like , does he get up and get ready like breakfast, hygenine so on. Or does he get up and leave MAYBE change but usually not?
I don't know how to bring this up to my kids dad. He is very sensitive and he always comments on how I always pick on him or say this and that that I don't like. And he is always defensive. How will he know if I don't say anything too. My daughters dad is very lazy when it comes to his appearance. Like he'll wake up maybe brush his hair. And maybe change. But he wears a crappy falling apart hat most days. Holey clothes out in public. Work shirts all the time which are usually stained. Wont cut his hair which I've been asking him to. I don't know how to mention things without him getting down or mad because I'm saying something he doesnt like or he thinks I'm picking at him. Honestly just don't know what to do. All I know is I'm tired of it. Doesnt wear deodorant most days because "he doesnt stink he needs a wake up call. He works in construction so I und6the clothes but going to the mall pr beach or park. Fucking come on it bothers me sometimes too much.
sherry S·
Is he depressed? Maybe take him to a men’s barber shop that they specialize in haircuts ,beard trims , if you have 3 kid’s with him and with him this long you should be able to communicate that you want him to feel good on what he wears and how he looks for himself 1st , some men don’t match for the life of them so help him pick out some new outfits
Amanda··
Мама троих детей
He was diagnosed with severe depression but he doesnt get help for it. I try talking to him but he doesnt communicate with me much. Omly when "he feels like it" and never about anything important. But I was thinking of getting him new clothes for his birthday maybe a hint because I dont want an argument and he can get a hair cut. I make him every holiday at least anyways..
sherry S··
my mom suffers from depression she’s on meds but,at times she won’t shower “my middle sister lives with her “ so I understand your frustration that’s why I asked if he’s depressed he may not be aware either ,my middle sister is bi polar and UN medicated so yes at times I’ve had to stay away from my mom because,I have children to put first and can’t have her act anyway she pleases in front of my children,hope things get better “does he dress like that for work ? Holes ,dirty clothes because,most jobs have dress codes and hair too . Yes maybe early bday gift of new sneakers and clothes “throw his old shit out” I couldn’t sit back and watch my man dress like a bum
Amanda··
Мама троих детей
that's very good you do that. He is bi polar and has depression and anxiety. But doesnt do anything to maybe help with it and uses it as an excuse (at least it seems) so I'm not too sure on how to handle it.
Saera·
Мама троих детей
Maybe he is depressed? My husband showers and brushes his teeth ect mornings and nights
Amanda··
Мама троих детей
He is. He is constantly doing things so it confuses me about what's going on
Saera·
Мама троих детей
Sorry just read the comment above that he does suffer from depression
sherry S·
My man showers 2-3 x daily every morning, then cooks breakfast he’s with our toddler while I work in the morning ,when I come home from work he will be showered again dif clothes &he works in the evenings also and my son will have had a bath too and in clean clothes always, we both clean the house daily we are clean freaks so it helps in our home we both do laundry,etc whatever has to be done for the family and he shave s his bald head daily and fixes his beard too ,my teenager gets haircuts maybe every 3 wks to fix his lines on his hair and his beard trimmed. Professional probably 1-2 a month and shower also 2-3 daily pretty normal
Amanda··
Мама троих детей
Wow that's great
Your Worst Nightmare 😘·
I’d probably tell him stay away
What's It To You?·
First thing is try not to compare it to you or others. Especially if he struggles with severe depression. Depression can drain you to the point you just don't care or just don't have the energy to care for yourself yet do other daily tasks. Not everyone is verbal about their struggles and some even try to hide it by continuing their routine without caring for themselves. Try to avoid flat out telling him, ect.
I read an article earlier that said:
“Patience and compassion can help your loved one know you care... Offering hope is probably one of the most powerful things you can do.”
Maybe try something subtle so he doesn't dig his mental hole deeper than it already is. Buy a body wash you think he'd like and say something along the lines of "Hey I bought some body wash I think you'd like, try it out and let me know if you like it so I'll know when I go shopping for stuff next time". For deodorant maybe buy one that's on sale or something and say "Hey I got this on sale for you". If budget can allow it, buy a couple new shirts for him and buy an outfit for you or the kids.
Amanda··
Мама троих детей
Thanks
Melinda Westad·
Wow that’s crazy! My husband showers every morning, shaves every other day, puts on work clothes, makes breakfast, and brushes his teeth. He’s always been very clean. If he ever started to slack off then I would definitely bring it up and try to find out why. Maybe there’s something deeper going on.
KLove·
I’ve been following and I know your situation with this guy. There’s no easy way to tell him. He will ALWAYS be defensive. Always! There’s no way to tell him anything without making him mad or him acting like you hurt his feelings just so you feel bad.
In all honesty, I’d stop going out with him. Sit your ass in the couch and say I didn’t sign up for this. If you’re not getting ready, I’m not going 🤷🏽♀️ When you go out, you represent us as a collective.
Oh and cut that ugly ass hat into pieces girl. What are you waiting for??
He’s mean and verbally abusive to you. There’s no excuse for that. Here you are STILL trying to take care of him...if that’s not love, it’s a trauma bond...which explains why you’re afraid of bringing it up. I just lost my little brother. Life is too short. Not just that sentence, but literally!! Stop wasting your life on him if he’s not loving you back!
Feeney··
This 👏🏼👏🏼 I’m also familiar with your situation and he is abusive. It’s not worth it girl. I’ve been in your place and I’m so much happier. Please think about your happiness
Amanda··
Мама троих детей
Thank you. And I'm sorry for your loss
Audrie Del-Angel·
Мама двоих (2 года, 10 лет)
My hubby gets up plays with the kids as they're waiting for breakfast and then he will eat breakfast with us then take a shower . He usually take 2 to 3 showers a day on his days off he will take the girls on a walk on the park trail