Is It Selfish to Want Opposite Shifts When Your Partner Works Long Hours?

I guess my question would be when would he sleep on those days that you work? I feel like a lot of the time in these scenarios the person working the night shift has it hardest because they come home to kids just starting their day

I truthfully think it depends I don’t see it as selfish I see it as maybe you’d like to get out and work which there is nothing wrong with sometimes I really miss working,but my DH also doesn’t want the children in daycare or a babysitter so I stay home with them, he also works nights 12 hour shifts 6pm-6am and I know it’s hard for him when he gets home he usually stays up for only and hour or so before going to sleep. what shift would you be working? Is he willing to watch them while you work?

Would he be able to get some sort of sleep before his next shift.?

Do you need the money? I ask because volunteering is very satisfying and you can have a flexible schedule to work around the family needs.

I don't see it as selfish. My biggest concern would be when would he sleep if he works all night then comes home in the morning and has the kids.

It kinda would be a lot on him. I wanted a job and worked those overnight hours. It was hard coming home already drained and then my daughter would get up and I was half ass taking care of her. I only did it about a week because I was physically and mentally drained

My husband and I did it. It was hard because he would have to use that time to sleep some, but my boys also still nap. He did feel like he wasn’t giving them his full attention though.

It’s not selfish but with his hours it would be a lot on him. Unless you work in the afternoon part time that way he has a few hours to sleep when he gets off.

I was going to say go for it, but I read these comments about when would he rest. I hope you do whatever suits both of you 🙏🏽 I miss working too!! I really need some time away too mama

Yeah not selfish to want to work but I imagine that would be really tough to not get proper rest on a consistent basis.

It's not selfish but it sounds REALLY complicated. Unfortunately parents in the military have to sacrifice often one being home with the kids for this very reason. If he isn't willing to put baby in daycare or have a sitter then he must be willing to help when the time comes. He can't have it his way or the highway, you have to be able to make a living and live your life too.

I don't think it's selfish at all but it is hard. When my 3 year old was a baby I worked part time. I went in when my husband got off work and then got home when he was asleep. I felt like I never saw him except for when we both had days off.

Thanks everyone. So he is the one who suggested that if I want to work to work a shift when he is home because he says we have better options besides a sitter. I have a small transportation business that I started a few years ago. I have a few employees that are driving so I can be at home with the kids. Sometimes I schedule myself to work a few hours just to get out but I want to actually clock in to someone else’s job. I have taken all of yalls advice. I also didn’t consider that they randomly have training and he doesn’t really get an advance notice besides be here at this time and place. I’m going to talk to him to see if he would reconsider a sitter. Maybe even his mom but if not I’ll just have to keep doing what I’ve been.

Concentrix, arise, and rat race rebellion have work at home jobs. Im with arise now and ive done concentrix before too