I used to do the same thing for my oldest until my family and friends told me to stop. After that my ex told me that he didn't even care about my oldest and didn't want anything to do with him.

If his father has him then his father is responsible for the supplies (clothes, diapers, wipes, formula, toys, etc.) you should not have to send him with anything really except for any medications that his father should be giving him. Aside from that file for child support if you're not getting any help. They say it has a fee but I filed mine online and had the head office of child support in the state help with the paperwork and didn't have to pay anything. His father will be paying for child support and the filing fee. If you two aren't together and he isn't helping at all and expects you to give him everything he needs then don't let him see him because that's not being a parent it's being a babysitter. I don't know if when he has your son if his mom is there with him all the time but he should be able to take care of him on his own without relying on someone else to be there with him.

Thank you everyone ! It’s so hard because they are definitely taking advantage of me ! I have to provide so should he! Period. I just wanted to make sure.

I’m really trying not to be judgemental here, but as women especially women who are acting as single moms, it’s up to us to create the boundaries that the fathers are supposed to follow. They shouldn’t be allowed to have sex with us and then treat the situation in a bad disrespectful and irresponsible manner. There’s a human involved now and with that comes responsibility. If he can’t handle that without your resources then he needs to be on the sideline until he can figure it out for himself. It’s hard to grow up sometimes but we all gotta do it...

I would just send pictures of what brand you use and tell them they can pick up their formula for their own house. If they can't afford formula for him, I would keep him home honestly. And as @fairykarmamomma mentioned, what about diapers, wipes and clothes??? He needs to already have those things at his home. I'm sorry girl 😭

I’d be saying “hmm maybe if you can’t afford the food he needs, you don’t need to take him with you” but that’s just me cause I’m a petty asshole. But I’d definitely be telling him that. It’s not you job to supply HIM with shit when he has the baby since he doesn’t help YOU. He wants to be a dad, to be a dad and buy your child what you need for him.

I would inform them, that if they wish to have him for Christmas, then they must provide everything for him during that time.... otherwise, it’s not happening. That is absolutely not fair to you.

It’s not fair. You shouldn’t even have to send a baby bag, he should already have everything he needs for these visits beforehand and shouldn’t be hitting you up about it. I’d send a picture of the formula he should buy and let him know that yes two cans should be enough and where to get the best deal. Remind him of clothing sizes so he can have those, diapers and formula ready. He’s not paying child support so he needs to at least come correct with that. If he isn’t correct then he doesn’t get his child. I know that sounds really harsh, I do but...To continue to allow this to happen and giving into what he’s asking for is actually enabling his behavior, so it must be stopped in its tracks early before it gets out of hand. He doesn’t get to demand like that when he’s not a financially participating parent but it’s gonna take you standing up to him and laying down the rules and boundaries.

Why is it your responsibility to give him formula when he can provide it himself?

I would give one like PP said and make him by another and let him know that when he has the baby, he needs buy what the baby needs while baby is with him.

Hey buy 2 cans of formula thanks

I would say “I will pack one can THIS time. But from now on he needs to supply formula for HIS child”