My son will be three in October and he doesn't listen no matter what we do. Time out doesn't work,…

My son will be three in October and he doesn't listen no matter what we do. Time out doesn't work, taking away toys, TV, etc doesn't work. Talking him through things has zero effect. Neither me or his dad believe in hitting for any reason ever. We were both hit as kids and we don't want him to grow up afraid to make even the tiniest mistake in fear that he's going to get hit like we both did. Hitting is absolutely not an option and that includes "light taps" it's still hitting. But he just doesn't listen. I could say no, or stop, or don't do that a thousand times and he will just completely ignore me. Same thing with his dad. He won't listen to either of us. Ive tried redirection and that isn't working either. Ive tried explaining to him WHY he can't do things or why he needs to stop and it doesn't help. We have an 8 week old now and this can't continue. I'm at my wit's end with him not listening to me. He screams bloody murder when I have to take something away from him and if i offer him something else to do he screams that he doesn't want to at the top of his lungs or he will slap or throw the object off whatever it's on. He throws himself at the ground and will purposely hit his head on things over the word no or if I tell him he can't have/do something. He will cry for over an hour over the tiniest things like if I ask him to pick a toy up and he doesn't want to. I seriously don't know what to do. He just doesn't listen at all.