Kathleen
kathleenc
Kathleen ·Мама двоих (младенец)

Does anyone else not take their baby to like baby groups or mum and baby groups? My health visitor always goes on about them but they’re just not my thing. I have really bad anxiety. It’s made worse when I’m around strangers and groups. They’re just not for me🙄

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casey19
Casey·Мама двоих (младенец)

I used to hate the idea and we do local toddlers now, just lived in December so knew nobody but it helps. I love seeing my boy play and learn social skills among others he wouldn’t normally see. The first week my boy was refusing to sit for snack without me so several mums offered a hand as I was feeding my youngest.

It gives you time and conversation which I think is the way to mummy sanity

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kikar
Kika·Мама сына-младенца

SAME HERE. Since the first day my health visitor was trying to convince me to see other mums as most of the time I’m alone with Dominik. And I always said no as I’m scared af.. so last time when she was here she pushed more and more till I said- okay. 😫 still waiting for her to message me about them🤦🏽‍♀️

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erincharlieconor
Jessica-Louise ·Мама троих детей

With my first I was made to go by the family nurse as part of my “recovery” from PND I hated it so much I even made my NaN come with me and I still felt awful, I couldn’t even go into a shop at that point in my life though!

I haven’t gone with the boys, Have taken them to parks , went soft play once and fun fairs but I dread going anywhere on my own because Charlie can be a handful. I do feel guilty us mums always feel guilty about stuff but if it’s not for you it’s not for you, once they start nursery they are at a better age and understand more and soon pick up things and learn. Xx

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casey19
Casey·Мама двоих (младенец)

I used to hate the idea and we do local toddlers now, just lived in December so knew nobody but it helps. I love seeing my boy play and learn social skills among others he wouldn’t normally see. The first week my boy was refusing to sit for snack without me so several mums offered a hand as I was feeding my youngest.

It gives you time and conversation which I think is the way to mummy sanity

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kathleenc
Kathleen ·Мама двоих (младенец)

They sound really nice. I went once before Harrison with a friend and her baby and it was probably the most awkward I’d felt in a long time. My friend went back a few more times then gave up. She felt they had all already formed a group and she was an outsider so she stopped going😕

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casey19
Casey·Мама двоих (младенец)

@kathleenc, I did get lucky I think. The local schools reputation is why we bought a house here. So think I knew the mums would be ok. All except one who looked me up and down and said oh you’re breastfeeding, almost as if I wasn’t the type 😂

Are there any other classes more structured ones?

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kathleenc
Kathleen ·Мама двоих (младенец)

@casey19, Not really. They all seem to be more aimed at mums getting together to be honest. I hate people like that! The one time no one wants to be judged it when they become a mum! I don’t really have anything in common with other mums. I don’t like the same things or have the same hobbies so I find when I do come into contact with other mums I don’t have anything to say😂

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tais01
Taisia·Мама двоих (1 год, 3 года)

Do your health visitors force you to participate in baby groups? So unusual for me! In my country we don’t have the same pieces of advice from hv. Contrary the can advice to abstain public places if there is an epidemic or smth like this. Anyhow in your daughter’s age she doesn’t need communication with other children.

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kim1995

Iv never been and my health visitor is the exact same ect but my Hv is rubbish , it’s just a shame that we all live far away from each other we would be fine if we went to one together 🤦‍♀️😣

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kathleenc
Kathleen ·Мама двоих (младенец)

I would go if I knew someone there or had a friend there. I hate being in a room full of people I don’t know😒

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kikar
Kika·Мама сына-младенца

SAME HERE. Since the first day my health visitor was trying to convince me to see other mums as most of the time I’m alone with Dominik. And I always said no as I’m scared af.. so last time when she was here she pushed more and more till I said- okay. 😫 still waiting for her to message me about them🤦🏽‍♀️

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kathleenc
Kathleen ·Мама двоих (младенец)

My partner actually had to tell my HV to back off a bit as she kept talking about it and I literally was not sleeping at the thought of having to go on my own😬 I’ve still not backed down. I just don’t want to🤷🏻‍♀️

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ginah
Gina·Мама дочки (2 года), беременна (23 нед.)

I didn’t go til she was about 8months old and I always got there early so I’d be first because I find it daunting to walk into a full room of strangers but Erica loved it so I just continued for her and gradually built up and ended up going to 3 or 4 a week. I’m the loner mum cause I everyone seems to know each other but I don’t care, it’s good for Erica so that’s all that I care about and I’m not really interested in making friends!! I now only do 2 groups and she’s in Nursery 2 mornings and we do a music group and a singing group- I prefer structured groups as it’s less chit chatting shit and Erica learns more too! I think it’s worth trying a few out! Xx

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kathleenc
Kathleen ·Мама двоих (младенец)

I HATE small talk and people asking me questions! It makes me feel so anxious! Harrison has no reaction to other babies😂 he’s around family babies and he doesn’t react to them either🤷🏻‍♀️

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sara-lou86
Sara-Louise·Мама двоих (2 года, 5 лет)

I didn't do many mum & baby groups with Morgan. I took him to baby sensory every week but because I had a few friends on maternity same time as me, I never felt the need for the other groups. As we met up all the time. However when we moved & I had Max I didn't know anyone. It was almost impossible to meet up with friends regularly because we lived further away. So I did look into various groups and tried a bunch. Some I preferred to others so I'd try to go to those every week. More for the boys than me. I never made any friends 🤣 But it was nice to get the boys out & doing something. So definately worth a go. If not for you then for your kids.

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amy89

I struggle with anxiety more so since I moved to Bradford cos I don't know anyone and people here just don't seem that nice tbh always get shit eye and stared at which makes me feel worse. I have been to playgroups with my other children wasn't really my thing but tried to go to a few sessions each month for kids sake, not been yet with Noah but I intend to when he's more active like crawling/walking not looking forward to it but I'll give it a go for Noah x

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em90
Emma·Мама двоих (3 года, 6 лет)

I never used to go to any. I've only just started going to one specifically for SEN children, and it's a lovely little group and obviously having other mums with children with SEN they are so unstanding and helpful. I guess what I'm saying is if you find the right group, it's really good to go to.

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colls2018
Colleen·Мама дочки (1 год)

I'm the same 🙄 x

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mariapb
Maria·Мама сына (1 год), беременна (18 нед.)

Set groups are awkward because you’re all kinda forced to get along. If they’re not your thing normal playgroups are different, because it’s usually more about the kids playing together rather than the parents socialising together. Soft play is the same, the kids can decide to play together or not and you’re not forced to make small talk if you don’t want to.

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mrsbodell
Kate Bodell·Мама четверых детей

I used to think they weren’t for me. My anxiety would be through the roof and I’d do anything to avoid them. I persevered and pushed myself to go. It gets easier and you will eventually find you will drop into conversations with other mums. We do three a week now and I love it!

Your HV will go on about them as it’s good for your little one to interact with other children outside of your family unit and in a different environment. It gives them a chance to develop social skills like sharing in preparation for nursery. Plus it’s nice for you to meet other parents.

If you find stay and play sessions a bit daunting I would recommend trying groups that have themes like music groups or swimming. That way you are following instruction rather than just sat whilst your child plays.

Don’t shrug them off too soon! They are a very valuable resource! You may grow to love them 😊

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mariapb
Maria·Мама сына (1 год), беременна (18 нед.)

I agree with this as well. I used to take my boy to water babies. It’s awkward at first but everyone is in the same boat, but if you don’t want to socialise you don’t have to because your focusing on instructions.

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zainab.1995
Zainab·Мама четверых детей

I don't go to playgroups. I have social anxiety so i will feel so awkward and feel like everyone is watching me lol

I do take them to indoor play areas when the weather isn't good but i fee like baby and mum groups are more about socialising which is a no no for me xx

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kathleenc
Kathleen ·Мама двоих (младенец)

Yeah I don’t want to be mean if I went but I’m not into socialising either. I have my friends and family that I know well who don’t make me feel anxious and I’d like to keep it that way👌🏼

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tammyxx
Tammy ·Мама двоих (младенец)

Me 🙋‍♀️ I've never ever been to one and so many people tell me about it and it makes me feel guilty that I don't take him so am guna try over come my own fear of going n try give it a go am still unsure what one to go to I don't think he's guna be interested either he just wants to shut doors all day 🙄😂 xx

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jodiedillon3
Jodie ·Мама двоих (младенец)

I dont either they are just not my sort of thing I did try but I really couldn't do with everyone staring and not talking to me and Harvey is a little behind and likes to do strange things the other children all just thought he was an alien so I dont bother and make sure we socialize with the familys children because they understand him more so I think it's okay alsong as they get some sort of socialization somehow 🙃 x

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