Two weeks ago I realized P had actually dated a woman that we see regularly back in 08 and never told me. I felt a…

Listen. I’m going to be very blunt and hope you really think on this. This “man” ain’t the one. He has disrespected you countless times while you’re carrying his child, he showed his ass saying the baby wasn’t his, the baby look tf just like him. He still paid hundreds of dollars for a DNA test. He hid a MARRIAGE from you. He has shown you time and time again why you shouldn’t be with him. I understand you are in love. I understand he loves your kids. I understand he is the father of your child, however this man isn’t a young cat. He isn’t going to change. You need to love yourself and know your worth and kick his ass to the curb. You are giving him your all to not receive the same in return. My heart breaks for you. It truly does because he is dragging you down and making you doubt yourself when you should be doubting him. Stand in front of the mirror and remind yourself how strong, smart and beautiful you are. You don’t need him. Much love. And I mean that.

😳hiding a marriage? I would wonder what else is being kept from you.

All my w2s are in and I'm thinking about using my refund to leave.

If I were you, I would consider googling the clerk of court where they got married and searching for the divorce decree. Has he produced it yet?

Listen. I’m going to be very blunt and hope you really think on this. This “man” ain’t the one. He has disrespected you countless times while you’re carrying his child, he showed his ass saying the baby wasn’t his, the baby look tf just like him. He still paid hundreds of dollars for a DNA test. He hid a MARRIAGE from you. He has shown you time and time again why you shouldn’t be with him. I understand you are in love. I understand he loves your kids. I understand he is the father of your child, however this man isn’t a young cat. He isn’t going to change. You need to love yourself and know your worth and kick his ass to the curb. You are giving him your all to not receive the same in return. My heart breaks for you. It truly does because he is dragging you down and making you doubt yourself when you should be doubting him. Stand in front of the mirror and remind yourself how strong, smart and beautiful you are. You don’t need him. Much love. And I mean that.

I'm not sure. For the most part he's a good guy. He's great to my son and our baby. He's a good provider. He doesn't game or party.

But I think he takes me for granted sometimes. I believe he loves me and the boys but our relationship is not good right now even before this.

He didn't think he could have kids and even dna tested our son. 😡I made a couple posts about it. So during my pregnancy I was soo depressed. I still have resentment for that. He as there physically but emotionally it was garbage.

He's still struggling with the past too. The difference I changed my whole life to show him that he and the boys are priority. I cut out anyone that was destructive. I can't ask him to do that. And now I can't help but think back to all the family functions and phone calls and times. He wasn't just talking to friend it was his ex wife!

I dont want to talk to her about it because I dont want her to see how devastated I feel. He's been totally supportive about the rage/devastation/ betrayal/ humiliation I've expressed. I just dont even know what to say anymore.

I'd actually ask her for proof that they're divorced. He hasn't been upfront with you before, so probably won't now. I would be talking to her about the situation and say you've found out and want to know if they're actually divorced or not. I know you feel differently, but I think for me, this would be a massive dealbreaker! It's a huge betrayal on you! I'd be upset enough knowing they had been in a relationship and he'd hidden it all this time, but to find out they were married and he kept that from you is insane! And the fact he hid it so he could still be in her life is just mind blowing to me! I'm sorry your going through this and I hope you find answers.

He has lied so much, the only real proof you have is that he is married. I'd 100% ask for proof of a divorce. He's lied so much, what's one more like for him?

Sounds like you guys need to have a serious conversation and ask if he’s still married, and if there’s anything else he’s keeping from you.

Whaaaaat!

Yikes, I'd ask him if he's still married. Or, I'd try to find out in my own if the marriage is still in effect

Here's the thing, he didn't come forward, he didn't admit this to you. How do you move forward from such a huge secret and violation of trust? Did you find a divorce decree? Are you sure he isn't still married? What else is he keeping from you??

It is a huge secret, and he's had years to bring it up. And the other night I told him I didnt want to be someone's girlfriend forever and he said he didn't want to get married again! Granted he said , never was extreme but still. Two years ago I wanted to get married. He said he wasn't ready.

Oh damn. That's a HUGE secret to keep. I'd be really upset about this.

😳hiding a marriage? I would wonder what else is being kept from you.

I want to be able to accept it and move forward. But all I'm doing is thinking about it, all the times we've saw her at family functions, comparing myself to her.

Wow. Talk about a huge violation of trust

Wowza, that definitely wouldn’t go over well with me.

Wow! You’d think he would mention that at some point. How long were they married??