Damn feel so emotional .

My son is 3. 3 years old and needing my attention super hard lately since his sister has been born.

Any time I have to feed/ hold Divina he starts acting out and doing Anything to get my attention.

He’s also been very bad lately , not listening and acting out on porpoise . I feel like a terrible mother because today I have lost my shit.

I screamed , and cussed , and cried .

I felt overwhelmed and depressed.

My daughter was having gassy tummy and for 3 hours just cried and wanted to be held . My son wouldn’t stop saying mommy , and needing me to do stuff and I lost my shit. I put my daughter down and screamed as I walked into my room cussing at the day and stars . And then I cried .

I cried because I love my family , but I miss my man all the time .

I miss having energy and really just feeling like myself . Today my postpartum brain, body hit me hard .

I’m not perfect , but I try to be the best mom / wife I can be .

I wish I had more patients , more energy.

I wish I didn’t scream . But instead I could deal with all the situations in a calm way . I wish I had the ability to not show emotion but instead handle it with care .

It’s hard sometimes because i know I can do better , but I feel so overwhelmed at times I’m blind to how little and fragile they are .

My son is 3 and sensitive . But I’m a load person, I’m Cuban and used to it. But sometimes when the overwhelming feeling hits and my son acts out and I have had a long stressful day x it’s not fair that I dont know how to be better or hold my emotions in .

I don’t want to scream, or cry, I want to be able

Be the best super mom I can be. Vocally , emotionality, lovingly , physically .

Today I wasn’t perfect and my emotions showered out .

Today I wish I could get a hug .