Ugh where to start first time ever doing something like this. But I’m going to put my self out here.…
Ugh where to start first time ever doing something like this. But I’m going to put my self out here. I found out that my husband of 9 years high school sweet heart 13 years together has been cheating on me for the last 4 months. We have 3 children together 11g,5g and4b. I am have kicked him out but and completely lost I could never afford three kids and our house bills on my own as he is the one who pays most the bills my teacher salary is what we live off child care, groceries,gas house hold money. I feel like I’m in a life time movie that no one in my life would ever believe my husband would do this amazing father most friendly and helpful person. But it did and I caught him. Then he confessed. What do I do not confront the female who has wrecked out life’s. Allow him to stay in the home we built move on and move out attempting to provide for my 3 kids alone . I mean where do I start. so I guess I’m writing this to see if I’m alone? Where should I start? When did we end? What did I do?
krys·
Мама троих детей
Thank you for your kind words. Yeah I don’t think I could ever confront her. I’m just not that person.
Malika Walker··
Мама двоих (1 год, 3 года)
Ik I'm super late but ima say this ik that shit hurt so bad but you love him and honestly you a hurt more if you just say you done and walk away. You will never forget but for you soul and your heart and your kids can you find yourself forgiving him no day. Even though say you stay and yall have a disagreement that's gone be the first thing that come to mind and come out your mouth. When it comes to her yes it's true the real issue ain't with her it's with your husband so most people a say it's no point in confronting her he did it he knew/know he married with a family. But me personally and from previous experience no its really not worth it to confront her cause he is the one who fucked up bbbbuutttt she played her part she knew he was married and got a family so she proud to be a side bitch but on the other hand its not worth it cause hoes llloooovveee when they found out about and the wife confront them. They love it they been waiting on the day to come honestly. Then say you confront her side bitches these days real disrespectful and she go talking crazy and you put your hands on her. You gone feel worse cause not only did your spouse your bestfriend your world cheat but now you sitting in jail waiting to post bail but the whole time you in there all you can think about is what was going on when you was free so now you locked up and he free and she free all thats on your mind is you really know they together while you wait. I just feel ik it hurt but you a be able to forgive if you really want to and make it work one day. Just to throw the towel in I don't feel that's the answer I was always told as a child by my grandmother who had been with my papa 74 years they day she died. IF YOU REALLY LOVE SOMEONE AND KNOW YOU DO YOU NEVER GIVE UP YOU STAY THROUGH THICK AND THIN AND FIGHT NO MATTER HOW HARD IT IS😘😘😘😘
cherise·
First off I want to say YOU did nothing wrong. HE did. I'd start off with therapy to help you find coping mechanisms. Then, I would file for divorce. You're married, he will have to pay alimony and child support and you stay in your house if you want too! As much as you want to blame the other woman ultimately it's on HIM. HE chose to do what he did. Be angry, use that anger towards your feelings to him if you ever find Your blaming yourself. YOU can overcome this and be strong mama your little ones need you. I'm sorry this has happened to you, he doesn't deserve you!
Emma·
I’ve been with my husband since school (1 years now) and I can’t imagine how devastated and betrayed you must be feeling. I would say that, if he’s willing to as well, then to go to couples therapy because 4 months of stupidity from someone you’ve known intimately for 13 years and have 3 children with isn’t worth throwing away without trying.
I’m so so sorry you’re having to go through this
Emma··
@mom_of_, so you knew about it and he carried it on?
krys··
Мама троих детей
about three months I saw a text on his phone all it said was how was your night I asked him about it he said it was a friend and it was nothing I never saw any thing again
Emma··
😞 what has he said since you found out
krys·
Мама троих детей
I honestly have no clue what I want I love him so much he is was I don’t know my best friend. I think what hurts the most is that I never ever would have thought he would cheat didn’t even notice him messaging her or going to see her and I feel the betrayal I could never forgive or be around I would rather feel the loss. The pain of the sorrow then even be with him and not have the trust for him.
krys·
Мама троих детей
This is going to come as a total shock to every one in our life family friends and our children no so far who know believe it happen have asked me for proof on if he really did it which scares me more like was this that big of a secret in his life that no one knew
krys·
Мама троих детей
Could I have maybe forgiven a one night stand drunken fight we had he strayed maybe in a couple years I could forgive him I can never forgive him for having a full on relationship with some one else
Melissa ·
Мама сына (3 года), беременна (38 нед.)
Only you can decide what to do.
Do you still love him?
Is he remorseful?
Is he willing to do whatever is necessary to fix it?
Can you see yourself forgiving him?
krys··
Мама троих детей
I do still love him he is my best friend . Like I said I am completely shocked by this although we had normal issues we talked every day we laughed every day we have a very active sexual relationship I and I don’t know in shock
Melissa ·
Мама сына (3 года), беременна (38 нед.)
Guess you pretty much answered those questions.
But I kinda agree with pp. If this was me I would want to try to forgive him and heal and stay together. After over a decade and three children I couldnt and wouldn't give up without a fight.
Sorcha·
Im sorry you are dealing with this and all alone. I agree with some of these other women. My husband and I have been together 15 years. Based on what you've shared and what has happened. Maybe a mutual discussion is in order. If it were me, in a similar situation, my instinct is to break ties. He wanted to have a long term (4month, or more) relationship, then he can have it. But not us too. I'd change the locks. I'd file for divorce. I'd let him know what I was doing and why. Because my husband is also my friend, I'd treat it much like I would a friendship that isnt working. I'd offer for us to be civil, and friends of he wants that, but he would not be invited into my space. If temporarily he needed someplace to stay, fine.... the couch or the porch is all yours. I'd seek out a lawyer and a counselor (for yourself and the kids). His family might be shocked and yours too, but that's on him. It's hard but I would also let close family and friends know, so you can be supported.