Okay please no hurtful comments I’m only assuming but I really think my SO’s niece might have like a…
Okay please no hurtful comments I’m only assuming but I really think my SO’s niece might have like a touch of autism or something. I’m almost certain she at least has ADHD. I’ll give some examples and y’all tell me your opinions.
1. She literally can not sit still. Her feet,hands, fingers.. something has to be moving.
2. She has “fits” where she throws herself to the ground or beats her head/face
3. She mumbles like we’ve been working with flash card on “sight words” like “car” “bee” and such and she literally can not say them. She will try sometimes but you can’t understand what she’s saying.
4. She’s aggressive when she gets the slightest bit frustrated or agitated like she balls her fists up and shakes and 90% of the time she was just pound anything close to her (including the other kids)
5. She seems like she can’t hear good or something like I have to literally say the same thing about 20 times before she’ll even look at me which usually that’s all she does and still continues whatever she’s doing. And she literally 90 MPH all day long like she doesn’t stop for ANYTHING
I don’t know much other than what I see and what google says which I know is a terrible resource and I don’t want to bring anything to the parents attention if it’s not necessary. If there is a possibility that she has autism or ADHD or something I’d like to at least know so that I can learn other methods to help her. I’m at a loss and don’t know how to teach her or help her because it’s as if she doesn’t understand or hear me. She’s 3 BTW.
*Edit*** She also doesn’t like things to touch her and she freaks with certain sounds and such. Example: we were doing finger paints the other day and when she put her finger in the paint she flipped out. Tightened her fists, screamed bloody murder and threw herself backwards on the floor...
Tabetha Ann·
Мама двоих (1 год, 6 лет)
Sometimes loss of hearing causes adhd symptoms. Only reason I say that is cause my son in order to get diagnosed had to get hearing tests to make sure that wasnt the issue.
Casey··
Мама дочки (1 год)
Sometimes I really believe she can’t hear me like even when she looks at me she just has a blank face like she has no idea I’m even saying anything
M H K S·
Personally, I'd say she should be evaluated! I'm not saying shes autistic or ADHD, however if my child was acting this way, I'd want to be able to help them properly if there is an issue, such as Autism or ADHD or pretty much anything!
Casey··
Мама дочки (1 год)
I believe they should at least get her evaluated because if something is going on she may need like a special therapy or something
M H K S··
@caseyann19 yes, I agree. 3 of my 4 children started speech therapy at 3! My oldest was actually evaluated for Autism, she doesn't have it. But it didnt hurt to make sure. Have the parents mentioned concerns to you?
Casey··
Мама дочки (1 год)
@witchy_momx4, no they just say that she’s a wild child. Which I know toddlers can be VERY wild I mean sometimes I’d swear my daughter was actually a loose animal from the wild 😂 but I just really believe the issue is a little deeper than that and I may be wrong about the autism or adhd and I hope I am but I wouldn’t even know how to bring it to the parents attention without causing issues because I know that’s a touchy thing to some people.
Sorcha·
It could be a few things. Ask parents if she has had her hearing checked. That would be a first step.
If she can't hear well she will be very frustrated.
How is her verbal skills? Can she talk.
Sight cards are good but even ECEs and kindergarten teachers dont used them with kids until they are 5 and 6 years old.
She might be under stimulated. She might need more outdoor play time or time to be physical. Kids at 3 are busy. And being on the go is normal. There attention span is 10-15mins. And that includes alot of movement.
From your description it doesn't sound like either disorder. But also not enough context and information.
If she is hard to manage definitely speak to her parents.
3 year old frustration can and definitely does show as being physical, both at themselves and at others.
Casey··
Мама дочки (1 год)
I’ll have to ask if she’s had her hearing checked! She’s not very verbal she can say maybe a handful of simple words like momma and such but they’re kind of different if that makes any sense like they don’t sound as plain as just “momma” this probably doesn’t even make any sense 🤦🏻♀️ the only reason the flash card thing was mentioned is because (and I know all kids develop at their own pace) is because my almost 2 year old daughter and my other 3 year old that I babysit can do them and I noticed that my SO’s niece struggles really hard with them and I didn’t know if she should be able to say some of them or not. I do highly believe that she’s under stimulated and needs more out door activities and such because I know her parents very well and I 100% know that they don’t do things like that with her like she doesn’t do any crafts, she’s BARELY outside, she doesn’t go around other children unless she’s here at my house and such. I just don’t know what to do to help her.
Sorcha··
@caseyann19 I'd let parents know you're concerned.
I'm also the type to find out if there is a children's hearing screening happening in your area. Therefore you can give them all the information in one shot.
I'd let them know that you recognize that their child is an amazing kid but that they seem to be struggling. And that you've noicted that they are struggling with hearing you and their peers. And that you are worried that her struggle is making it hard for her to feel comfortable and happy. I'd even preface the conversation by saying that you want to ask and share some concerns that You understand they might not want to hear but as a parent you would want to know. Then ask if they had ever wondered if she might have a hearing impairment. And if she was ever tested. And could they maybe look into it again. I'd also state that this is a conversation you'd rather not have but you feel that it might benefit her. I'd let them know that you aren't judging or criticizing, but are concerned and want what's best for her. And that you are sorry you are even having to bring this up.
*its hard for any parent to hear another person has noticed something that might not be perfect about our child. Its hard for us not to feel blamed and guilty for not noticing or recognizing. It's hard for us to acknowledge we might not see an issue. So tread lightly and acknowledge that this is hard for them too.
If you suspect hearing issue or autism. PECs are awesome tools. Same with sign language. PECs are pictures that represent items, feelings, or requests. Also visual schedules help kids with learning routines and prepare for changes. These are tools used by educators. For her age simple picture schedules are wonderful. I always use pictures and simple words for this age.
Casey··
Мама дочки (1 год)
thank you so much for you’re awesome advice!! I mentioned it all to my SO and he ended up calling his mom and come to find out she’s notice a lot of it too but just hasn’t said anything. I know I’m eventually gonna have to talk to the parents which there is a family dinner Saturday and I think afterwards I’m gonna try to let them know my concerns. Hopefully they won’t take it the wrong way cause I’m really not judging or anything I just really do worry about her and want to see her achieve so many things and right now with her having these issues I know she has a hard time and it makes me feel so bad for her. Maybe it’ll go well and they’ll at least have her hearing checked and I’ll at least know if she can hear me good and such. Then we’ll go from there. Thanks again for being so tremendously helpful in my really difficult situation 🥰
Leah·
Have her parents ever mentioned that she snores at night? My older son started having some behavioral problems and then I read an article about sleep apnea and realized he definitely has it. It can cause adhd symptoms and behavioral problems because they don't get a restful sleep. They're just constantly exhausted.
Casey··
Мама дочки (1 год)
No they’ve never mentioned ANYTHING they honestly just say that she’s a wild child. Which I know toddlers can be extremely wild but that’s all they’ve ever said
Steph·
She definitely needs to be tested. My 4 year old gets speech and OT and it truly makes a difference! If she is having difficulties etc, the best thing to do is have her evaluated by a specialist. My son has tubes put in which was affecting his speech. I know she isn’t your child but the first step should be a hearing test.
Steph··
@caseyann19, if you are comfortable taking to your SO’s parents then that’s what I would do. No one wants to hear, that there could be something wrong with their child but she can get so much help if there is a problem! I live in NJ and my son is in a preschool program here and he gets speech and OT from the school. He just started in Sept and went from not talking much to speaking so much more. I can truly see a difference.
Casey··
Мама дочки (1 год)
the grandmother has already noticed some of the same issues I have. The mom is a little more touchy like she doesn’t like for anyone to point out things about her daughter which I understand that but sometimes it’s really necessary I know if it was me I’d rather someone come come and tell me they think I should have my daughter checked that maybe she has some issues hearing or something than for me to just not ever notice and my daughter struggle with no help. Hopefully I can get this sorted and she’ll get evaluated and we’ll know exactly what’s going on! I’m glad to hear your son is doing so well!
Steph··
@caseyann19, oh ok. I hope everything works out and if she needs some help, she gets it! Believe me, I didn’t want to think my son needed some extra help but seeing how much improvement he has made makes me feel better! A hearing test can even be done at the pediatrician’s office. My son had lots of ear infections so we had to see a specialist but my oldest had his hearing tested as part of his checkup. Not hearing correctly can delay speech.