So I’ve been staying in my mL house for a week because of money issues. I’m in the process of getting back on my feet by…

I think I’m on the other side of things, or maybe it was just how I was raised. But MIL is already providing a roof over your heads. I get that money is tight but when she agreed to take you in was she also aware she would be providing everything for the 3 of you?

I feel like bringing in your own food/toiletries would be the respectable thing to do, since she’s already done so much by letting y’all stay there.

We stayed with my MIL while saving to buy our house and absolutely didn’t expect her to buy anything extra for us, even though she too has the money. We were already just very appreciative of her letting us stay with them so we could save up some money.

There’s a huge difference in feeding one extra person, and feeding an entire family.

And if “no one else is providing” for your own kids, you’d be living in “your own” house. She doesn’t have to feed you. She doesn’t have to let you live in her house. If you have problems with her guidelines, get your own house.

I’ve had both my fil and bil live with my husband and I, and it almost drove us to divorce, when I ended up doing laundry, cleaning up after, and cooking for two extra people when I have my own shit to do. And that’s why I will never again allow ANY other family member, his or mine, to live in our home.

@xomarylee if she was doing everything for you that's another story. But if you provide for yourselves and she invited you to stay i think it's rude. She also is saying baby you and her son. As a grandmother though she should be willing to give the clothes off her back for the baby. She shouldn't have even asked u to stay. Again if you were not helping to provide id understand she can't take care of you all but considering u do and she told you to come it's rude. Or she could have went about saying that in a better manner to not make u feel like shit.

@beakymcspence, yeah we never told her we wouldn’t pay rent.. because we are planning to.. plus it’s been a week not like we are living here for months laying around. In a week I’ve gone to the store twice for snacks, juice, bread etc little stuff and that’s what we eat pretty much. And I don’t do laundry here or anything so I don’t use her stuff up.

@mrschanandlerbong95, I keep mentioning this.. we rarely stay in the house to begin with.. because of our jobs and how we spend our think working on getting a place. I also provided food for the house and me and my dude clean after our selfs and our baby.. she doesn’t even pay water or light and we don’t even eat up her all her food.. so idk why she was complaining about it and told us “there’s no food for you guys in this house” when the house is always stocked up because me my dude and her... she don’t provide anything for our daughter and I don’t expect her to. I just felt weird after she spoke of FOOD like that... to her our son and granddaughter

@xomarylee, It can be super awkward when there’s that tension. When we had to ask his brother for rent (which never happened) or to pay his utilities it was so frickin awkward it required wine after lol

@ddsr, another mom said that also and I’m thinking about doing that but I was just mentioning how uncomfortable I got Over the situation.. it’s like damn so no good for your granddaughter either.. it just really got to me.

@xomarylee, It’s your business regarding your kids and how close together they are and therefor it’s also your business to provide for them..not your MIL I believe that was her point. Regardless your MIL could have been more tactful with her approach regarding her concerns! Living with family can be so stressful! We have done it and it damn near split us up. Was a bit different though his brother was renting our basement suite and they never paid rent it became a real burden. A year later and we still don’t speak to his brother and the girlfriend over it because they’ve never paid the thousands it cost us in lost rental income.

There’s a huge difference in feeding one extra person, and feeding an entire family.

And if “no one else is providing” for your own kids, you’d be living in “your own” house. She doesn’t have to feed you. She doesn’t have to let you live in her house. If you have problems with her guidelines, get your own house.

I’ve had both my fil and bil live with my husband and I, and it almost drove us to divorce, when I ended up doing laundry, cleaning up after, and cooking for two extra people when I have my own shit to do. And that’s why I will never again allow ANY other family member, his or mine, to live in our home.

Buy a mini fridge and keep your family groceries there. That's what I did when my SO and I lived at his parents house.

@scruffy.nerf.herder regardless of how you interpreted @xomarylee post what gives you the right to start judging her? Not a damn thing🤷 you have an opinion cool good for you, keep it to your self. The whole point of this app is for mother's to vent and complain about whatever their heart desires and not once in her post did she ever even mention about being ungrateful for anything🙄 let her do what she has to for her family and let her be like why are you trying to make her feel worse when she's already not having a good day? You wouldn't want someone calling you an "entitled brat" for feeling uncomfortable in a situation so why call her that💁

@scruffy.nerf.herder, that’s how you view it 😂 it’s ok. You don’t live my life or go through it with me to know how tf I really am. My post was about how uncomfortable I felt because never in my life will I deny my family food.. ESPECIALLY IF IM LETTING THEM LIVE AT MY HOUSE.. especially if I notice they help out is so many different ways.. when she lived with us we never denied her anything jet alone FOOD! But I guess I’m feel entitled.

@xomarylee, see my previous post “Life can be so positive when we practice gratitude”.

You sound like an entitled brat tbh 🤷‍♀️

@scruffy.nerf.herder, well first of all I have kids so dam close together because it’s my fucking business! No one else is providing for my kids but me and my dude. And you can’t be talking or judging because one day you could be great and the next day is never promised.. we have money and all but because of house issues we couldn’t stay in the house and are looking for a better place but we aren’t rushing to just be anywhere because our kids safety matters. I am very greatful to her plus we do for her all the time!!! I was just raised differently especially about food WHICH THIS POST IS ABOUT !! FOOD! It’s just if I ever have people in my house I wouldn’t be so damn stingy and tell them people I’m helping that “THERES NO FOOD FOR THEM” when she knows we provide food for the house also.. we don’t go around eating all her groceries and leave her with none.

How is she being petty or inconsiderate or rude? It’s her house. Maybe you and your boyfriend shouldn’t be having kids so close together if you can’t provide on your own for those kids. I think you should be grateful for having a roof over your heads. Life can be so positive when we practice gratitude

@modom16, no she doesn’t buy for us.. like I said I buy groceries also..

SUCKS that will treat you that way after the fact that they gave you the “OK” to even come into their home in the first place.. i hope that something works out for you so that you &’ your family won’t have to live there anymore..

Groceries for an extra family is a lot of money and a lot to expect of someone

She could have been more polite, but I can see her side. If your not able to help provide reach out for some community supports, food bank, emergency funding for rent etc. I personally don’t see it as offensive I mean as adults we are expected to provide our own food and toiletries and maybe she can’t afford herself to help you with everything? I mean she is putting a roof over your head so it’s not like she’s being horrible to you.

@xomarylee ..she is super rude! What does your man her son say..i was raised to help also and if your in my home even to visit I make everyone feel at home..and cook for them...just how I was raised...you have her grandchild and are pregnant..she should voice her concerns with her son....i would leave asap..sorry your going thru that hope things get better..Make a a plan..do you and your husband work? They have organization s that can help with rent deposit s to move

@xomarylee, I feel you. I would do the same thing. You should sit down with her & tell her you feel uncomfortable now or it’s gonna be a long month feeling the way you do.

Now if you’re living with someone not paying rent or helping out with anything & expecting shit then I can see her saying that BUT like you said y’all try to help out as much as y’all can so I don’t see why you couldn’t eat what’s in the house !?

@xomarylee, if you’re helping buy food as well, and not eating hers, I’m not sure why she said something to begin with? It’s good you’re not expecting her to provide for you. But maybe that was her way of letting you know she can’t afford to buy groceries for herself and you 3. All I was saying is, she shouldn’t have to and I think it would be unfair to expect her to. That being said, my mom would starve before she let my DD not eat 🤷🏻‍♀️

@dope.ass.mom, I feel like doing that but at the same time it just got to me.. on a different level. Like if you feel that way about food I won’t even want to use your water, your light .. your space .. your tv you’re plates like am I thinking to much because I would give my meal to someone in need just because it’s FOOD, get what I’m saying .. like I can’t deny people food or water..

@ek620, I’ve just been on both sides of this. We stayed with MIL and also had my brother stay with me for a month. My brother doesn’t work or drive etc so my parents bought his food,toothpaste etc. he used our shampoo and didn’t wash his towels or dishes. So our electric went up, water went up, he was using our WiFi, ran out of shampoo faster and had to do even more laundry. All while being pregnant,working a full time job, and taking care of my 4yo. I work hard for my money and the roof over my head, to keep my lights on and water running. Idc to help someone out but I won’t be taken advantage of 🤷🏻‍♀️

@xomarylee, Na I get where you’re coming from! I experienced something similar acouple yrs ago. Can you tell her how you feel? Or is she set on what she said? Cause it is fucked up especially if she allowed y’all in there in the first place & you’re pregnant ? Na I’d get my own damn food & keep it away from her!

@ek620, I guess I was just brought up differently.. I never had to ask to open a fridge when I was little and when we helped out people it’s because we knew we had enough. I’m not expecting for her to let us live here for weeks free of charge. But if you’re being petty about food when I have a little kid and stock up the fridge also it’s just plain rude to me.

@garay88, @xibkhadiia, @dope.ass.mom, @lauren_leigh, I completely get what you guys are saying but we are never in the house to begin with and don’t have money for a place but we have always helped her putt and provided for her when she needed it .. and still provide food for the house also. I just think it’s completely wrong to say something like that when it’s only been a week. It’s like if she doesn’t want us here she could of not even let us stay the first night. I just also think when you HELP Someone out you don’t tell them there’s no food for you guys. Like it’s different with your own expensive shampoo and body wash ... NOT FOOD!

@lauren_leigh, I agree 100%.

If someone fell on hard times & needed a roof over their heads then expected me to provide food for them just because I buy myself expensive snacks I’d be beside myself. I’m happy to help out with food but to be expected to help out? Nope. 🙅🏼‍♀️The ungrateful attitude would be enough for me to ask them to leave.

I think I’m on the other side of things, or maybe it was just how I was raised. But MIL is already providing a roof over your heads. I get that money is tight but when she agreed to take you in was she also aware she would be providing everything for the 3 of you?

I feel like bringing in your own food/toiletries would be the respectable thing to do, since she’s already done so much by letting y’all stay there.

We stayed with my MIL while saving to buy our house and absolutely didn’t expect her to buy anything extra for us, even though she too has the money. We were already just very appreciative of her letting us stay with them so we could save up some money.

I would just stock up on food for you & the baby & get yourself a mini frig for now..that way she can’t say shit about y’all eating whatever’s hers & the same goes for her with your food! And just keep to yourself until you leave. I was in a position like that at one point before getting our own place, it sucks but you have the end of the Month to look forward to.

She is fucking rude inconsiderate and unhelpful your pregnant she should think about that

@xibkhadiia, that’s she can also eat idk if she eats from what I bring or not** but it’s all together in the house.. or was I just raised differently

@xibkhadiia, I just thinks it’s so wrong.. they act like they care and say they want to help but they don’t even help. And to even talk about food!! Like come one!! You’ll stock up on groceries but me and my baby can’t eat. Am I over reacting?? When I also bring some food to the house.. bread, juice, fruits, cereal, snack.. that she eats also.