@mj21on3 My man works and don't really want me working since I had our first wanted me to stay home. I was gonna but ended up going back cuz working what I did. I'm not the type to not be active but I'm so thankful this Pregnancy I have been able to stay home tho it's been much easier pregnancy than the other's but still has the complications just not as bad.

@autism.mommy you gotta do what you gotta do for your kids❤ in all honesty if i could make the money i do at my job by working at home I'd quit in a heartbeat! Lol my sons dad is primarily a stay at home dad, he works on my days off sometimes for extra money, but 90% hes home and i definitely prefer it that way lol he does too.

@mj21on3 Yes, that's sad she is doing that. My one friends get like lil under $200 a month and uses ir on both her children and lives wirh her parents also. Claims she can't work due to medical issue's and need this test done but has nobody to watch her youngest. I habe offered to watch him for how ever long needed so she can do the week long test and recovery for free all I asked was she brougt his basic needs.(Clothes, toothbrush and anything else I might not have here for him) she has yet to make the appt and this was like a yr ago.

Honestly, it's driving me crazy being a SAHM I rather work but I know my kid's needs are more important.

@autism.mommy i completely understand. I have a bestfriend who is turning 25 on Saturday that just had her 3rd child, has not worked in 5 years and is living at home with her mom with all 3 of her kids. She complains CONSTANTLY of hating being at her moms and being a SAHM but she will not get a job!!! Up until she had her newborn both of her older kids are in school 8-4 and with their dad every weekend. But she will make EVERY excuse in the book of why she cant work and blah blah blah BULLSHIT. And she now is getting an outrageous amount of money from her 2 older kids dad and has been bragging for months about how her and her boyfriend (the new baby's dad) are going to buy a house now since "she can afford it" because shes getting child support. It drives me crazy!!!! Lazy lazy people that have no desire to support their own damn selves. I personally just simply cannot stand not providing for myself and having to rely on someone else to make sure me or my children get what we need. Shouldnt be that way.

@mj21on3 Yes, Sadly I know many women who live off CS and refuse to work but yet complains their baby needs this and that but don't wanna work. They claim they can't but no doc note to back it up..... My son doc has sigh a form for me to currently not work to met all his needs. Meaning his appts and all that I was having issues meeting cuz I was working. I still have not once ever asked his father for any money or anything but to sigh the papers to be seen... Yes, I'm still a SAHM and my man is supporting 2 kid's that are not his, one that is and the one on the way and he pays CS for his child who the mother left him to get with another man. Than left him and filed for more child support cuz she left that dude and he has no job to help support the other dudes kid as well to get with another man. Yes, confusing and grimy and not even a week after the bitch had brand new $700 phone but she needed more CS for the child. Makes no sence..... We only know cuz she contacted him saying she had a brand new phone said the phone and when my man looked it up was expensive n she paid full price that's not including the activation fee and service cuz she changed back to another carrier

@mj21on3, preach!!

I totally agree with what you're saying. I get child support from my 2 year old's dad (because unless he has jail held over his head he wouldnt help me with a single dime) anyways i have never once ever put money he gave me for my daughter into any of MY bills. The way i see it is its my responsibility to pay my own bills to take care of my kids (two of which are not his so why would his money go to our rent or lights?) Every dime i dont use on diapers/pull ups, and essentials for my daughter goes into savings 100%. I have an account in my daughters name that will be hers on her 18th birthday, i have ALL the extra money her dad has ever given me for child support in that savings account.

It pisses me off so much that people use child support as their only income and its an excuse to not work for your own self! That money is FOR THAT MANS KID ONLY they are the only one that should benefit from it! Child support is good in many many ways but its also so unfair to the fathers most of the time. A man shouldnt have to pay their babymama's bills for 18 years just because they made a kid TOGETHER.

@kesh-kesh ,I get it and I know this sounds messed up but HE should've thought about that before he started having babies with multiple ppl. That means daddy needs a second job. That's why they say it's cheaper to keep her. They slack up on their kids bc they have to pay rent elsewhere but the mom's have to get multiple jobs and all the stress. The man really isn't responsible for the mom's rent but I spend a lot on the girls and me and Shun have these debates a lot and feels like you... What if I was paying rent elsewhere? I'm like that isn't my issue, we have two small children and the childcare alone will be 1k/mo, insurance $400/mo, they eat about 200/mo grocery, transportation 200/mo... Even if I pay my own rent, buy the clothes and pay for the extracurricular activities.. You'd still owe me $900/mo and I could care less about your other obligations bc I'm handling mines so you should handle yours.

@kesh-kesh The boy's dad litterly does nothing and I'm fine with them. I left him due to some issue's he refused to get help or work on and I realized it was time to go... I have Full Physical Custody of them but if he can be civil. I will let him see his boy's but never once have I ever asked him for Child Support only to sigh paper's for his boy's to get see at Doc's cuz some do need both parents concent and he knows a head of time and his gram will know as well.

Now I will add if the mother has health problems or has a specials needs child she has to stay home with then I completely understand having to use child support for rent. Especially if this was something that was known before hand.

@autism.mommy, my girls dad is active in their lives and we are together but there was a time we went through something and weren’t. I did my part he did his. Never needed child support.

@kelley.blue, I agree food for kids, camps, anything for that child he should be responsible for. I’m not saying he shouldn’t help with his kids if he pays child support but he shouldn’t be paying for anything for the mother. Now paying half your rent cool but I said Mother’s who put it all towards rent and mothers who have fathers on child support but he already takes care of his child as he should. Now you have a man paying child support and doing for his child as he would if the child lived with him. How do oh expect him to survive? What if he has other kids?

@kesh-kesh , I agree but their child support is rarely half. I know ppl that pay over 1500/mo for one child and I know ppl that pay $150/mo for one child. My friend has 5 kids and if one dad is only paying $150/mo for his child, how can she not need extra help somewhere else? The dad was mad bc she asked for help getting school supplies! Like come on dude!

@kelley.blue, if it’s for the child he should pay half if it’s something you would of had to have or had before kids no.

Ps. Let me say this, I get the fact that once you've put him on child support your mindset should be that that's probably all he's gonna do bc legally that's all he has to do. But my so/father of my kids pays his older kids mother a set amount each month yet, when things come about such as extracurricular activities, back to school, Christmas, summer vacay or even if we see them and "I"don't feel that their hair or something is up to par then he's going to do extra just bc they are his kids and we know what it really costs to take care of children. Their mother's home is paid for to top it off. She rarely gets the girls new clothes or get their hair done so we know she's probably spending that money on some other bills but we know the kids are benefiting from that as well... If she's using it on food and lights, they're benefiting.

@kesh-kesh , if you didn't have children you could be paying $650/mo for a 1 bedroom oppose to paying $1200/mo to house children that you all made together. Also, what if he's only paying $150/mo in child support? Would that cover $600+/mo childcare, $200+/mo grocery (not counting if they need formula), $50/mo diapers, clothes, doctor appt co payments, transportation costs (we pay for our daughter's transportation to school bc of our work schedules)etc??? As a parent, he should want his children to be active so what if the children do extracurricular activities (karate alone costs us $125/mo, and ballet $50/mo) Not counting the upkeep costs for the child's hair (I spend $50-100/mo on that). So even if you were to split that ticket he would still be way off. There would definitely be a need for more. Men think their little $300/mo really makes a difference... Not so much!

Well technically... There is more to it than that. In my situation, my 2yr olds father and I aren't together anymore and he pays child support and has weekend visitation. The reason we aren't together is because he was abusive and I left him when my son turned one. He has 2 good paying jobs and all I can ever seem to get is part time, minimum wage jobs since the only experience I have is maintenance and customer service... With a part time, minimum wage job, I cannot afford child care and my mother who is the only one capable of watching my kids, works a full time job and is 64yrs old, and can't handle a newborn. So the only option left is being a sahm, which is only possible because my boyfriend brings in and ok amount of income, but half of my child support goes to paying half of rent and utilities, technically speaking, that is being used for my child, since having a roof over his head, running water, and electric is a necessity for his survival.