Angela
preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

So I need advice (no judgment, I know what mistakes I’ve made and I’m trying to correct em) my soon to be 13 yr old has been giving me problems about doing chores, anytime I ask him to do something he complains or questions it before doing it. I know I’ve spoiled him to much. He has a dirt bike that I spent 3 grand on last year, a $400 hooverboard, a laptop, Xbox one and some other stuff. He used to help me so much but lately he has an attitude. He’s very active in sports since he was 5, playing 2 sports at the same time so he hardly did chores. He’s not currently in anything till football starts and he jus has this attitude like I have to do the things I do for him. Even cooking for him! I recently told him that if he wanted name brand clothes for school he needs to work for them by doing extra chores. Like our yard. Of course he started fussing about it and I jus got so mad I made him take everything out of his room but his furniture of course and some clothes. I told him if he wanted all the things I worked to buy back he’s gona have to do chores and if not then he gets nothing. He said he would rather have nothing so we will see how long that lasts because he’s always on his stuff. I also said I wasn’t goin to but him any fast food or snacks anymore. Besides what I buy for the house. Let me add I don’t give him allowance but if he asks for money not much I give it to him or if he wants to go somewhere with his friends I pay. So my question is am I being to harsh? I just need some advice from moms of teens that have had this problem. Is there anything I should do?

Комментарии

mhbb29
Melissa ·Мама сына (3 года), беременна (18 нед.)

@preciouslove

I had a lot of chores growing up and we did not get an allowance at all. At 15 I got a job and paid for my own expenses and even gas to my mother. I didn't always like it but looking back it was good for me. I'm my opinion parents who don't give their children responsibilities and consequences are doing them a disservice

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sassybitch
That Bartender Girl·Мама двоих (3 года, 11 лет)

@preciouslove That's just fine. I was thinking the same thing!

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@sassybitch, same here! I’m definitely gona keep in touch with u if that’s ok!

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sassybitch
That Bartender Girl·Мама двоих (3 года, 11 лет)

@preciouslove I hope it works for you too! It's so nice to know that I'm not the only one who struggles with a tween with a bad attitude!

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@sassybitch, Girl I feel you. The only thing my son is expected to do on a daily basis is keep his room clean throw out the trash, and even then I have to remind him to do so. He also takes out the trash can to the curb once a week. Which I also remind him to do most times. I’m definitely gona do that. My kid is so ungrateful sometimes he tells me I didn’t ask for the dirt bike or he says why do I have to do chores? I told him today that the only thing I need to do for him is feed him clothe him and give him a bed and that i will not do anything extra for him until he wants to help. I’m jus fed up he used to be the sweetest boy and lately he’s been a brat. He said he shouldn’t have to help me with his lil brother and sister because he didn’t ask to have them. All I’ll ask is he hold em once in a while I make a bottle or grab a diaper and such.

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callatelaboca
·Мама двоих (4 года, 5 лет), ждёт третьего

@preciouslove Nope I wouldn't it's still a privilege to do so , he can't listen I wouldn't

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sassybitch
That Bartender Girl·Мама двоих (3 года, 11 лет)

I've had the same types of problems with my almost 12 y/o over the years. He's also spoiled, but very active in sports and he excels in school. Last year, I felt like it was one battle after another. I stopped paying him for his chores because he was doing them every 2-4 days instead of every day. Now he only gets paid if he does his chores when he's supposed to without me having to ask. I also put restrictions on his phone and Xbox...I keep his charger and controllers. He automatically gets one charge on his phone a week. If he wants more than that, he has to do more than expected. He gets game controllers for one hour a week. Again, if he wants more, he has to earn it. Trust me, even with these restrictions, he's still living the good life!

Oh, and the only chores expected of him on a daily basis are to keep the kitty litter clean, take out the recycling, and empty the dishwasher. This kid has it SO easy!

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@xo_parkersmommy_xo, @itsmely, @sarinasmomma, @peppa., @glencoco, @mhbb3, so do I still let him go play with his friends or ground him. I initially said he’s not allowed to go out and play because he can’t do nothing at home.

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@mommamia18, lol yea that’ll be him love I already know.

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mommamia18
Marie Rose ·В ожидании первенца

You don’t sound wrong mama. My grandma used to do this to me it made me change real quick lol at first I was like I don’t need it keep it my whole attitude changed by mid week 😂😂

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@mhbb3, I won’t I get so mad that he acts like I have to do these things!

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@glencoco, He doesn’t start for a month. :/ He definitely does care he’s jus trying to act like he doesn’t right now lol

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@peppa., exactly he needs to learn now before he’s older!

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@sarinasmomma, yes ur right girl for some reason he thinks he’s the boss smh

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@itsmely, yupp I’m not going to girl he will get tired of it I’m sure!

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preciouslove
Angela·Мама четверых детей

@xo_parkersmommy_xo, thank u hun I’m trying!

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mhbb29
Melissa ·Мама сына (3 года), беременна (18 нед.)

I think you are on the right track. He just has to learn if he acts like a brat he doesn't get rewarded. consistency is key so don't give him anything back until he shows he deserves it.

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glencoco
K·Мама двоих (младенец)

If he doesn’t care about getting he stuff back then I wouldn’t even let him be on the football team or maybe talk to the coach and make him work harder at practice. 🤷🏻‍♀️ he’s definitely feeling entitled.

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tatsandcats
Erica·Мама дочки (1 год), беременна (2 нед.)

I don’t think you’re being too harsh. He’s a teenager this stage is always hard for both parent and child. I don’t have a teenager but I helped with younger siblings and at this age she was awful. And I was too. He just needs to learn who’s boss and he needs to help around the house to be rewarded! You’re doing a good job momma!♥️

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callatelaboca
·Мама двоих (4 года, 5 лет), ждёт третьего

nope and I definitely wouldnt take gim anywhere either. can't abide by the rules then you don't get privileges. also my Brother has a 4 uear old and when he doesn't listen and decides to hit etc. he gets all his toys taken out of his room and is not able to do anything he likes inculding tablet time.

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